The Corner of Spirit & Brave

THE LESSON I LEARNED FROM REALITY TELEVISION – The Cost of Judgement by Pennie Hunt

3/29/2026

I am not a real fan of reality television. I will admit that in the last few years, I have sporadically watched a few. I haven’t watched the famous families or housewives. From the trailers, I always felt they were about drama and tearing people down.
The ones that I have watched are about building relationships. Sure, there is drama, and at times I question the reality of it- is it real or is it scripted, scheduled, and staged?

One show has the premise of ‘dating’ without seeing each other. The question is, do looks really matter? Can they fall in love with another human without seeing them? And then, when they do, will their looks matter and change the way they feel?

The second show is similar. Couples meet, but they don’t know each other's age. They get to know each other and build a relationship before they ever find that out. The age difference between couples ranged from 17 to 30 years. When that reality hits, will it matter? Will it change the way they feel about each other?

The combination of these two shows has me pondering. With all the arguing, disagreements, and issues in our world, what if...

What if we didn’t know what people looked like? What if we didn’t know their age? What if we didn’t know their beliefs, their past, their mistakes, their struggle, or their fears?

If we didn’t know these things about another person, would we build a better relationship? Would we see them differently? Would we see their hearts rather than their outward looks? Would age really matter? Could we look at a person as a person and not judge them?

Judgement is the real concept. The deeper concept. How many times have you judged someone by their looks before you even knew their name? And would their name cause more judgement?

Sometimes we judge people as being too young to have the experience required to know much about life. They are too young to pay attention to.

Sometimes we judge people as being too old to bother with. Too old to listen to. Too old to spend time with or learn from, after all, they are not up to date or up to speed on life anymore. They are dated, obsolete, and disposable.

Then add these to this list of judgements. We judge them on their past, where they grew up, what kind of house they live in, and their personal style of dress. We judge quickly and lock in our judgement. Is that fair?

Then we find out more about them, and we build more judgement. When we find out the mistakes they have made. Oh… they are divorced. Oh, they are a different religion. Oh, they went to rehab. Oh, oh, oh. We lock in our perception of what this means and lock in our judgement even further.

Should any of this matter? Depending on the situation, maybe some of it should. And some of it shouldn’t.

What if, for one week, you looked at people by looking at their hearts? Not their looks, their age, or their beliefs. Just look at their heart. Get to know their heart. Reach the spot where you realize that without the facts that create judgement, we are all the same. People. Just people. Can you, for even just one day, see the reality? See the person?

Pennie’s Life Lesson: The reality of life is that judgement clouds our view.

YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at:
[email protected].
Thank you!
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THE MESSY MIDDLE OF YOUR MIND By Pennie Hunt

3/22/2026

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Join me in an exercise. Sit or stand tall with a straight back. Put your arms in the air, stretching above your head. Now intertwine your fingers and bend your elbows a bit. Notice that your arms are forming a circle around your head.

The inside of this circle represents your life, your world, the universe you live in. Notice, there is only one thing you can physically see in your circle. That is your head… your mind.

Here is the problem. The space around your head, the space between your arms and your head, represents everything outside of your mind. The events in the world, the actions of others, the circumstances of life, and even the weather. You cannot control any of that. We worry about it. We give advice. We try to manipulate and maneuver a way to control everything.

We complain about situations in the world. We tell others how to live their lives and how they should act, think, and speak, according to our ideals. We become disillusioned, disappointed, and discouraged about events in our lives. Our minds stew in anger, worry, and fear.

Then we become frustrated that we are not changing things, and our self-talk kicks in at full speed. After all, we are not good enough, smart enough, or capable of fixing everything.

All of this causes us stress, tension, health issues, and more problems to worry about. It is a brutal loop of destruction.

There is only one thing in your circle that you can control – your mind. Your mind is the messy middle of your circle. The place where you imagine things that haven’t happened yet. The place where you exaggerate the things that have happened. The place where your self-talk sabotages everything you can control.

The only thing in your control is what your mind produces…your thinking, your thoughts, and your beliefs. It all begins in your mind and leads to your actions.

Here is the tricky part. Our mind wants us to believe that we can control the circle around our head. Our minds want us to believe that worrying and exaggerating help. It wants us to believe that we can fix everything for everyone in that circle. And then, and here is the messy part, our mind beats us up when we can’t. It is a crazy kind of mental mess.

Here is what I want you to think about. Look at yourself in the mirror with your arms circling your head. Take a good look at that circle of space around your mind. Then imagine looking deep inside your mind. It is like a computer filing everything you see, hear, touch, and taste. Everything you like or dislike. Everything you know and have learned in your lifetime. There are a million files open.

Remember, the only thing in your control is what you are thinking, your thoughts, your beliefs, and your actions. Close those files on what you can’t control. Close files about other people that are none of your business to worry about. Close the files of negative self-talk. It will take time. It will be difficult to release some files that you are used to having constantly open. But, for your health and happiness, close them.

Concentrate on controlling what you can. Be realistic. There will always be bad things happening in our world. If you can make a difference that matters, do it. If not, close the file and move on.

Control your thoughts. Keep them in a positive posture. Get your beliefs in order. Your values and beliefs should be something you measure your life by. Not other people’s lives, but your life. Only you can control you.

Your job is to keep the messy middle of your mind organized, calm, and at peace. When you do, your life will feel in control.
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Pennie’s Life Lesson:
The only thing in your control is what you are thinking,
your thoughts, your beliefs, and your actions.
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It Is ALL Temporary by Pennie Hunt

3/15/2026

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I was trapped. My eyes were tightly closed to protect them from the glass and debris. I tried a tiny squint, but all I could see was darkness. The strange silence was only interrupted by the sizzling of my car. The smells of antifreeze, oil, and gasoline mixed with the windshield fluid and the hot asphalt of the road.

I couldn’t move. I was physically and emotionally alone for what seemed to be forever. I thought death was an odd situation – if that was where I was.
Then I saw the light.

This was years ago, but I can recite second by second every thought, every feeling, and every minute of the hours that it took to cut my car apart, remove me, transport me by ambulance to the hospital, and endure hours of testing and fear.
When trauma hits, when life is difficult, when the world feels uncertain, it seems like it will never end. It will.

Everything is temporary.

We all go through difficult times of intense loss, transitions, and pressure. Some of the hardest times are the loss of a loved one, divorce, health issues, and financial stress.

The death of a spouse, child, or parent is statistically ranked as one of the most difficult experiences a person will go through. Grief and loss create a powerfully painful journey.

Transitions such as the loss of a job, bankruptcy, separation, or divorce cause major emotional stress and require regrouping and starting over.
A health crisis for you or someone you love can magnify the physical component of a stressful situation.

During any of these scenarios, the loss of control takes over. Being overwhelmed and stretched to your limit becomes your life. Temporarily.

Uncertainty flows through your veins. The fear of what the future will be financially, what your identity will look like, and where the rocky road is taking you, adds to the difficult times. Temporarily.

The withdrawing behavior of turtling away from the world and living in isolation may feel safe…temporarily.

Even during the most difficult of times, remember it is temporary. There will be light in your life again. Reach out to friends, family, and professional help. As hard as it is, try looking at the challenging time as a learning experience and an opportunity to grow. And focus on taking one moment, one day, one week at a time. Patience can be your friend during stressful situations.

That day, trapped in my car, hanging upside down by my seat belt, in the darkness, and engulfed by the smells I can’t forget, the pain and panic seemed permanent. Fear and uncertainty overwhelmed me. And then… a voice began yelling to me, the airbag that surrounded me was punctured from the outside, and I saw light.

When my car was dismantled, and I was lifted out by firemen and rescue workers, I felt the light of the sun and the heat of the hot summer day. Confined to a gurney by a neck brace and backboard, I was rolled down the hallway and once again squinted from the bright lights of the emergency room. After being in the darkness, light was comforting.

The recovery was slow and painful. I was forced to become very good at patience. I isolated for a while, but with the support of many medical professionals, family, and friends, that difficult time of my life was temporary.

Was my life forever changed? Yes, but it wasn’t over. I learned about myself. I grew. I changed, and I realized that there is light after darkness and everything is temporary.
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Pennie’s Life Lesson:
Everything is temporary.
There is always a light after the darkness.
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FORGET WHO HURT YOU – Remember who loves you by Pennie Hunt

3/8/2026

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Who hurt you?

If I ask you that question, I predict you could list a few people and circumstances. You might go way back to when you were young and work your way through your life. You might think of the neighborhood kid who bullied you in first grade. The person you went to the Jr. High School dance with and never called again. The friend in college who stole your boyfriend and married him. The boss who didn’t give you the promotion you deserved. I am sure you are mentally creating your own list of people who have caused you pain.

Our brains tend to hold on to these hurtful memories. As the list grows, the hurt becomes deeper. The scab is pulled off… again and again.

Now, think about this. Who loved you? Who loves you now? Who made or makes you feel loved?

Our brains hold on to these memories too. My list would begin with the kindergarten teacher who always wore a white beaded necklace and gave hugs every morning. My grandmother, who taught me how to paint, decorate cakes, and understand life. My lifelong friend, who for years walked with me in the early mornings, and together we solved the problems of the world. My husband, my children, my parents, my siblings, my friends, my dogs… I could go on.

What would your list look like?

It may be very different than mine. Both of our lists would be individual to our lives. Hopefully, your second list will be much longer than the first one. But the first list may receive the most attention from our thoughts. More attention than it deserves.

We are given love and feel love every day. They can be tiny glimmers of care that zap our hearts, but our mind doesn’t record them as important. We glaze by them – but they matter. Think about the barista who decorated your coffee this morning with a milk foam heart. When your cat lies on your lap and vibrates a calming purr that goes right to your heart. When your toddler runs to you when you pick them up from daycare after a long workday.

We are also given moments of hurt and pain. These zap our hearts, and our mind grabs them, thinks about them, and stores them so we can pull them out and allow them to punch our hearts, and yes, the scab comes off… again and again.
What if, for one day, you could forget the hurt and pain of yesterday? What if you could forget who hurt you? And what if, for one day, you could remember who loved and loves you?

It is a mind shift. It’s heart-clearing and mind-cleansing. You remove the memories of hurt and allow space for memories and feelings of love to fill the opening.

Begin your day by standing in front of the mirror and saying to that beautiful reflection, “I will forget who hurt me yesterday and remember who loves me today.”
You may need to say it more than once. Then step outside to begin the day and feel the glorious sun on your face. Do you feel loved by the warmth?

With every step of your day, with every meeting, with every smile you receive, remind yourself that you feel loved. You may need to repeat your mirror talk throughout the day to keep your mind set on love.

When you concentrate more on who and how you are loved instead of who and how you have been hurt, your day will be very different. Continue this pattern, and your life will be very different.
Now let’s see that list… who loves you?
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Pennie’s Life Lesson:
I will forget who hurt me yesterday
and
remember who loves me today.
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LIVE IN YOUR OWN WORLD by Pennie Hunt

3/1/2026

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Are you happy? Really happy?
Most people would initially say, yes. But after consideration, they may add a few qualifiers to their response. Like, I am pretty happy, but I will be really happy when… And then the requirements are added.

When I lose weight. When I get a better job. When I find the love of my life. When I buy a house. When. When. When.

When all of these requirements are lodged in your mind, it creates a life of conditional happiness. This state of conditional happiness is typically created because of comparison. We look at someone else’s life and compare it to our own. We want the house they have. We want the job and the income they have. We want the love they have. We want the physical beauty and health they have. We compare ourselves to them. We compare our happiness level to our perception of their happiness level.

Our happiness becomes conditional upon achieving what someone else has. In the process of constant comparison, happiness is blocked.

Here is a concept to think about. Live in your own world.

Did that sink in? We create our own conditional happiness by living in someone else’s world. We spend way too much time studying someone else’s life and not paying attention to our own. Yes, our neighbor may have purchased a new car last week. Yes, our friend may have a newer and bigger home than ours. Yes, our coworker may have lost weight and has a new wardrobe and a new love in her life. But why should any of that affect our happiness level?

It does because we create space in our mind for comparison to build. We live in a space of constant desire, anxiety, and frustration. Our mind’s rationale is this:
    If the thing they have seems bigger and better than the thing I have,
they must be happier than I am. Therefore, I must be less happy.

We are spending too much time in their lives and not living our own. What if the only house you knew about was your own? It would seem like a pretty nice place. What if the only car you knew about was yours, and it got you where you wanted to go- it would seem like a pretty nice car. What if the only life you knew about was yours? It would seem like a pretty nice life.

You would be unconditionally happy with your world because there would not be anything to compare it to.

So, the way to live in unconditional happiness is easy. Goals are good. Wanting to improve your life is great. But stop comparing your world to someone else’s. What is happening in someone else’s world is none of your business. Keep the qualifiers, requirements, and the whens out of your happiness. Keep your head, your thoughts, and your eyes on your life. Live and be happy in your own world.
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   Pennie’s Life Lesson:
Don’t wait for when.
  Live and be happy in your own world now.
  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

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THE LESSON I LEARNED FROM REALITY TELEVISION – The Cost of Judgement by Pennie Hunt

THE MESSY MIDDLE OF YOUR MIND By Pennie Hunt

It Is ALL Temporary by Pennie Hunt

FORGET WHO HURT YOU – Remember who loves you by Pennie Hunt

LIVE IN YOUR OWN WORLD by Pennie Hunt

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THE LESSON I LEARNED FROM REALITY TELEVISION – The Cost of Judgement by Pennie Hunt

THE MESSY MIDDLE OF YOUR MIND By Pennie Hunt

It Is ALL Temporary by Pennie Hunt

​FORGET WHO HURT YOU – Remember who loves you by Pennie Hunt

LIVE IN YOUR OWN WORLD by Pennie Hunt

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FORGET WHO HURT YOU – Remember who loves you by Pennie Hunt