WHAT I LEARNED IN A DARK MOVIE THEATER
I bought one ticket. I bought the large popcorn and drink combo. I sat in the last row. Middle seat. I had never done this before. There is something about seeing movies in a theater. The big screen mesmerizes me. The sound swallows me. The popcorn tastes like it could be the last gourmet meal of my life – to me it’s that good. I love going to a movie theater, but I had never in my life gone alone. There was a movie I wanted to see. The timing wasn’t right, no one wanted to see it with me, so I thought I would have to wait until it was out as a rental. The movie chased around in my thoughts. It was about someone who had lost a child. Of course that is what drew me to it. The common thread. The curiosity. I wondered if the movie would portray my thoughts and feelings. I wondered if I would learn something I didn’t know about grief. It followed me around pulling my heart along, not allowing me to push it away. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to see the movie. Driving an hour to the shopping area, my whole body smiled. The entire day was mine. A day of “me” time. After a little shopping and lunch at my favorite place, the movie flashed in my mind. I quickly looked on my phone. It was playing at a budget theater nearby and I had just enough time to make it there. But…I had never done this before -- gone to a movie alone. Is that weird? Is it weird that I am kind of afraid to do this? Is it strange that this movie has such a grasp on me, constantly taking space in my thoughts? My fear played ping pong with the movie. The movie won. The back row wasn’t bad. It felt safe. No one could see me – or the giant bucket of popcorn I balanced on my lap. At 1:00 in the afternoon on a weekday there were 6 other people there to share my theater. None of them came alone. Except me. I shut off my phone. Two hours went quickly. The movie was amazing. I cried. I hurt. At times I wanted to shout at the screen. There were moments I wanted to pray. I understood why I needed to see the movie. The message was for me. I sat in my seat until the last credit rolled, the lights were bright and the workers came in to clean up any abandoned popcorn buckets. A few things became very clear. It was clear to me that I would not have received the message the movie brought to me if I hadn’t listened to my heart pushing me to see it. It was clear to me that although going to a movie alone may seem like a silly fear to some, it was real to me. Walking into that theater was empowering. It was clear I had missed opportunities in my life when I allowed fear to win. It was clear to me that I did need to see the movie. I needed to see it alone. I needed to be able to cry alone. I needed to absorb the meaning of the movie’s message --alone. Life is magical how it manipulates us, bringing us messages we need to hear, putting us in places we need to be, pushing us to do things that we are afraid to do. All of it done with the intent of giving us clarity. And yes, I ate the entire bucket of popcorn…. Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Listen when life is pulling, pushing and prodding you to do something that stirs fear. Until you walk into it, you will never fully gain understanding, clarity and strength.” 
YOUR TURN...
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to walk into your fear. Don't allow it to keep you from the clarity it brings. Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2017 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint permission please email: Penniehunt@gmail.com
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MEDITATION SAVED MY LIFE!
I began meditating over a decade ago during a very stressful time in my life. I was certain my mind and body would explode from the pressure, as I tried to handle many highly emotional life situations. Desperation set in as I struggled to gain some essence of control in my world of chaos. My first attempt at gaining relief from this tension was when I sat down, closed my eyes and with the sound of rain falling in my headphones said to myself over and over and over again, "Clear my mind... clear my mind... clear my mind." I didn't know what meditation was, nor did I realize that was what I was doing. I just knew I needed peace in my mind, heart and soul I lasted about five minutes, before I jumped up believing I had failed as my mind hadn't cleared at all. Determined, I continued this routine daily and soon I became more and more successful. Some days I could actually sit for the 5 minutes and my mind would clear. The minutes turned to ten, then fifteen and at times I would sit for hours. Meditation saved my life. I learned how to separate myself from the world outside of my body and control my emotions, thoughts and feelings. I could handle the stress of all that was happening in a clean, clear and calm way. After years of learning about the many various types of meditation, I have settled in to what works for me. I believe you do not have to follow a certain meditation dogma or philosophy to receive an emotional and physical benefit. The basic premise is to quiet your thoughts and allow calm, contentment and peace to fill the space of your mind and body. Now, whether I want to relax and release tension or concentrate on one thought, I turn to daily meditation as my life saving method. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie's Life Lesson: "Quiet your mind and allow calm, contentment and peace to fill you." ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ YOUR TURN... My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to find your own place of quiet, place of solitude, place of peace. Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2017 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint permission please email: Penniehunt@gmail.com 
SOMETIMES I
DON’T WANT TO THINK ABOUT YOU Sometimes I don’t want to think about you. I want you out of my mind. I want empty space. I want a white screen. I want a fresh canvas. I want a blank page. I don’t want to think about the day you were born. That look in your eye telling me more joy and pain than I could ever imagine was ahead of me. I don’t want to think about your blonde baby hair and those killer brown eyes. I don’t want to think about watching you ride your bouncy horse-- boots, chaps and hat on, swinging plastic guns and yelling, “Giddy up” as you flew across your imaginary world. I don’t want to think about how many skateboards you went through, how we hung the broken ones on your bedroom wall like trophies and the surgical stitches that became your scars of honor. I don’t want to think about home runs, hockey goals and potential. I don’t want to think about fishing, hiking and camping trips. I don’t want to think about balloons, parties and 22 years of blowing out candles. I don’t want to think about the drumming, the singing, the music that spilled from you – and the music left inside. I don’t want to think about the jokes, the joys, the fights, the I’m sorrys and the I Love Yous. I don’t want to think about the days of celebration and the long nights of worry. I don’t want to think about how your hugs felt. How your laugh sounded. I don’t want to think about the phone call that ended the memory stream. I don’t want to think about how you leaving shattered my heart. The strength it took to mold it back together and the unrepairable cracks left open where pain whistles through with every breath I take. I don’t want to think about the tears, the regrets and the hurt. I don’t want to think about that oak box, the baskets of flowers and your silent guitar. I don’t want to think about everything that has happened since. I don’t want to think about how many years I have ahead without you. Sometimes I don’t want to think about you. I don’t want the constant pain. I don’t want the reminder of what I no longer have. I don’t want memories attaching to my every experience, my every move and my every breath. I want empty space. I want a white screen. I want a fresh canvas. I want a blank page --to rewrite the story. Sometimes I don’t want to think about you.… And then, I do. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Hold tightly to the people you love. Someday you will only hold thoughts of them.” J.T.
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