Pennie Hunt
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WHAT I LEARNED IN A DARK MOVIE THEATER

1/28/2017

2 Comments

 
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WHAT I LEARNED IN A DARK MOVIE THEATER

I bought one ticket.
I bought the large popcorn and drink combo.
I sat in the last row.  Middle seat.
I had never done this before.

There is something about seeing movies in a theater.  The big screen mesmerizes me.  The sound swallows me.  The popcorn tastes like it could be the last gourmet meal of my life – to me it’s that good. I love going to a movie theater, but I had never in my life gone alone.

There was a movie I wanted to see. The timing wasn’t right, no one wanted to see it with me, so I thought I would have to wait until it was out as a rental.

The movie chased around in my thoughts.  It was about someone who had lost a child.  Of course that is what drew me to it.  The common thread.  The curiosity.  I wondered if the movie would portray my thoughts and feelings.  I wondered if I would learn something I didn’t know about grief. 
It followed me around pulling my heart along, not allowing me to push it away.  I couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to see the movie.

Driving an hour to the shopping area, my whole body smiled.  The entire day was mine. A day of “me” time.
After a little shopping and lunch at my favorite place, the movie flashed in my mind.  I quickly looked on my phone.  It was playing at a budget theater nearby and I had just enough time to make it there. 
But…I had never done this before -- gone to a movie alone. 
Is that weird?
Is it weird that I am kind of afraid to do this? Is it strange that this movie has such a grasp on me, constantly taking space in my thoughts?
My fear played ping pong with the movie. 
The movie won. 

The back row wasn’t bad.  It felt safe.  No one could see me – or the giant bucket of popcorn I balanced on my lap.  At 1:00 in the afternoon on a weekday there were 6 other people there to share my theater.  None of them came alone.  Except me.

I shut off my phone.  Two hours went quickly.  The movie was amazing. 
I cried.  I hurt.  At times I wanted to shout at the screen. There were moments I wanted to pray.
I understood why I needed to see the movie.  The message was for me.
I sat in my seat until the last credit rolled, the lights were bright and the workers came in to clean up any abandoned popcorn buckets.

A few things became very clear.
It was clear to me that I would not have received the message the movie brought to me if I hadn’t listened to my heart pushing me to see it.

It was clear to me that although going to a movie alone may seem like a silly fear to some, it was real to me.  Walking into that theater was empowering. 
It was clear I had missed opportunities in my life when I allowed fear to win.

It was clear to me that I did need to see the movie.  I needed to see it alone.  I needed to be able to cry alone.  I needed to absorb the meaning of the movie’s message --alone.

Life is magical how it manipulates us, bringing us messages we need to hear, putting us in places we need to be, pushing us to do things that we are afraid to do. 
All of it done with the intent of giving us clarity. 

And yes, I ate the entire bucket of popcorn….

Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Listen when life is pulling, pushing and prodding you to do something that stirs fear.  Until you walk into it, you will never fully gain understanding, clarity and strength.”

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YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to walk into your fear.  Don't allow it to keep you from the clarity it brings. 

Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                Thank you!  
                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
                                    All Rights Reserved
                      Copyright © 2013-2017 Pennie Hunt
            This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
                           Feel free to forward this post.
             Please keep the entire message intact, including
                   contact, logo, and copyright information.
       If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint              permission please email: [email protected]
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MEDITATION SAVED MY LIFE!

1/20/2017

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MEDITATION SAVED MY LIFE!

I began meditating over a decade ago during a very stressful time in my life.

I was certain my mind and body would explode from the pressure, as I tried to handle many highly emotional life situations. Desperation set in as I struggled to gain some essence of control in my world of chaos.

My first attempt at gaining relief from this tension was when I sat down, closed my eyes and  with the sound of rain falling in my headphones said to myself over and over and over again,

     "Clear my mind...

        clear my mind...

        clear my mind."

I didn't know what meditation was, nor did I realize that was what I was doing.   I just knew I needed peace in my mind, heart and soul

I lasted about five minutes, before I jumped up believing I had failed as my mind hadn't cleared at all.

Determined, I continued this routine daily and soon I became more and more successful.  Some days I could actually sit for the 5 minutes and my mind would clear.  The minutes turned to ten, then fifteen and at times I would sit for hours. 

Meditation saved my life.

I learned how to separate myself from the world outside of my body and control my emotions, thoughts and feelings.  I could handle the stress of all that was happening in a clean, clear and calm way.

After years of learning about the many various types of meditation, I have settled in to what works for me.

I believe you do not have to follow a certain meditation dogma or philosophy to receive an emotional and physical benefit.  The basic premise is to quiet your thoughts and allow calm, contentment and peace to fill the space of your mind and body. 

Now, whether I want to relax and release tension or concentrate on one thought, I turn to daily meditation as my life saving method.
               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
Pennie's Life Lesson:
           "Quiet your mind and allow calm,
          contentment and peace to fill you." 
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to find your own place of quiet, place of solitude, place of peace. 

Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                Thank you!  
                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
                                    All Rights Reserved
                      Copyright © 2013-2017 Pennie Hunt
            This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
                           Feel free to forward this post.
             Please keep the entire message intact, including
                   contact, logo, and copyright information.
       If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint              permission please email: [email protected]

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SOMETIMES I DON’T WANT TO THINK ABOUT YOU

1/14/2017

6 Comments

 
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  SOMETIMES I
  DON’T WANT TO
 THINK ABOUT YOU

Sometimes I don’t want to think about you.
I want you out of my mind.  
I want empty space.  
I want a white screen. 
I want a fresh canvas.  
I want a blank page. 

I don’t want to think about the day you were born.  That look in your eye telling me more joy and pain than I could ever imagine was ahead of me. 

I don’t want to think about your blonde baby hair and those killer brown eyes.

I don’t want to think about watching you ride your bouncy horse-- boots, chaps and hat on, swinging plastic guns and yelling, “Giddy up” as you flew across your imaginary world.

I don’t want to think about how many skateboards you went through, how we hung the broken ones on your bedroom wall like trophies and the surgical stitches that became your scars of honor. 

I don’t want to think about home runs, hockey goals and potential.

I don’t want to think about fishing, hiking and camping trips.

I don’t want to think about balloons, parties and 22 years of blowing out candles.

I don’t want to think about the drumming, the singing, the music that spilled from you – and the music left inside.

I don’t want to think about the jokes, the joys, the fights, the I’m sorrys and the I Love Yous.

I don’t want to think about the days of celebration and the long nights of worry. 

I don’t want to think about how your hugs felt. How your laugh sounded.

I don’t want to think about the phone call that ended the memory stream. 

I don’t want to think about how you leaving shattered my heart.  The strength it took to mold it back together and the unrepairable cracks left open where pain whistles through with every breath I take.

I don’t want to think about the tears, the regrets and the hurt. 

I don’t want to think about that oak box, 
the baskets of flowers
and your silent guitar.

I don’t want to think about everything that has happened since.

I don’t want to think about how many years I have ahead without you.

Sometimes I don’t want to think about you.  I don’t want the constant pain.  I don’t want the reminder of what I no longer have. I don’t want memories attaching to my every experience, my every move and my every breath.

I want empty space.  
I want a white screen. 
I want a fresh canvas. 
I want a blank page --to rewrite the story.
​
Sometimes I don’t want to think about you.…
     And then, I do. 

              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
     “Hold tightly to the people you love.          
           Someday you will only hold
​                     thoughts of them.”

J.T.
Jameson Tanner

​1-14-1985  - 9-13-2007

                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to hold the ones you love tightly. Because, you never know...

Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                Thank you!  
                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
                                    All Rights Reserved
                      Copyright © 2013-2017 Pennie Hunt
            This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
                           Feel free to forward this post.
             Please keep the entire message intact, including
                   contact, logo, and copyright information.
       If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint              permission please email: [email protected]
6 Comments

THE WALK

1/6/2017

0 Comments

 
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THE WALK

I began this year with a walk.
I had walked around this lake many times, but this time was different.
It was cold. The wind raw.
Not my typical walking weather. 
I bundle up in layers of protection and begin. 

A wind gust stings my face and I think of January of 2016 when my dog, Yogee, passed.  Like the wind, the memory stings my heart.  I draw my scarf tighter around my neck and dig deeper to pull warm memories of her around me.  Happy memories of her.

I turn a corner and remember March, when a new joy filled my heart. I named this fur child, Gracie.  I smile at the way she has added love, energy and, yes, Grace to my life.

A sequence of three planes fly over me.  I look at them remembering all of the flights I have been on, the trips I have taken, and the adventures I have enjoyed in life.

Couples walk by and I think of the paths I have walked.  Sometimes with a partner holding my hand keeping me stable, safe and secure.  Sometimes alone struggling to see the road ahead.  Equally teaching me and taking me to my next destination in life.

Cars rush by on one side of the lake and I feel the rush of my life.  How I have pushed through spaces in such a hurry to move on… missing the little things, the important things, the meaning of things.

I hear a squeal and turn to see children running across the frozen lake, their dog chasing them in a game of frozen slip and slide.  I reach for my heart fearing the thickness of the ice may not be strong enough to hold them.  Then I see myself, ice skates on racing across the ice, circling my brother as he ice fishes and my dog running close behind.  I feel the pain of the times I fell, laughed and bounced back up. 
When did I grow up?
When did I become afraid? 
When did I learn fear?  
When did I stop enjoying the game?

Halfway around the lake the bitter wind makes me want to turn back.  The distance ahead is shorter.  I’ve seen what is behind me.  My only choice is forward. 

And then I stop.
The sun is reflecting off the lake and shining in my eyes.  The frozen water dances like glitter and warms me.  I close my eyes and remember my times being at the ocean, watching the sun shimmer across the waves.  To me each sparkle from the reflection is a person who was here and gone….jumping and shouting at me,
“love this time, enjoy this life and even though you can’t see us we are still here!”
I feel them with me as I push forward.

Coming to the end of my circle I reach a bridge. Stepping on its wooden frame I see the bridges I have crossed when life gave me no other choice than to jump the gap below.  I see the bridges I have burned and the ones that have burned me. I am silently thankful for being brave enough to cross all of them.

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Running down the slope of the last hill the walk goes faster, the memories flash quicker, time speeds by.  I think of things I have done that I wish I could undo.  Things I have said that I wish I could take back.  I think of things I have accomplished and people I have helped and my heart hopes that my honorable actions outweigh my wrong doings.

January 1st is no different than December 31st or any other day. Sunrise to sunrise the days blur. 
The years pass.
The walk continues.
It isn’t the turning of the calendar page – its memories that turn time. It’s how we loved and how we were loved. It’s the hearts that met ours to create the scenery in our journey.

Geese fly over sounding their horns of celebration.  Celebration of joy, of love, of life.

I began this year with a walk.
t was cold. The wind raw.
I bundle up in layers of protection and continue. 

Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Be grateful for this walk you take through life.  Enjoy every fall, every bridge, and every step.”
 
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to experience this walk we take through life.  Be grateful for all the paths, the falls and the steps forward.
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                Thank you!  
                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
                                    All Rights Reserved
                      Copyright © 2013-2017 Pennie Hunt
            This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
                           Feel free to forward this post.
             Please keep the entire message intact, including
                   contact, logo, and copyright information.
       If you have any questions or comments, or for reprint              permission please email: [email protected]
0 Comments

    Author

    There is a certain magic about where I live both physically and spiritually – on the crossroads of Spirit and Brave. 

    It seems appropriate that my writings be found under the sign that locates my life.  I wish for all of you the ability to live in your Spirit to experience a life filled with love and gratitude and be Brave in the learning of your life lessons. 

    Enjoy!
            Pennie


     

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PLEASE NOTE: This page does not provide medical or legal advice, professional diagnosis, opinion, treatment or services to you or to any other individual. Through this site and links to other sites, Pennie Hunt provides general information for inspiration, encouragement and educational purposes only. The information provided in this site, or through links to other sites, is not a substitute for legal, medical, or professional care, and you should not use the information in place of a visit, call or the advice of your lawyer, physician or other healthcare provider.   

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 Copyright © 2012- 2024  Pennie Hunt -  All Rights Reserved
Photographs by Pennie Hunt and Materpiecebysarah.com 

Happiness Joy Love Grief Health Writing Motivational Speaker Author Columnist                        


  • Home
  • Speaking
  • About
  • Contact
  • Syndicated Columnist
  • The Corner of Spirit & Brave
  • Testimonials
  • BOOKS
  • Videos
  • Social media
  • Love-Life
  • Pennie's Ponderings ~ Quotes
  • Pennie's Life Lessons
  • Pennie in the News
  • Meditations
  • UPCOMING EVENTS