Maybe it is a little voice you hear inside telling you what to do. Maybe it is a twinge in your heart or a tightening in your stomach. Maybe it is a sudden outbreak of goosebumps, shivers, tingling, chills, a glimmer of a vision, or just an overwhelming knowing. Your inner compass has a way of communicating with you. It tells you what is right and wrong. It points you in the direction that is meant for you.  

These messages come to us in times of despair and depression. In times of uncertainty and confusion. In times of difficult decisions and changes in life. If you listen, you will always be given the answers, and your inner compass will give you the next step. Your inner compass will lead you to the path forward, the path of self-discovery, and give you a sense of intuition of what your next step should be.

This is not a new concept. In 1933 the psychiatrist, Carl Jung wrote letters to people who asked him how to get through life. He wrote,

“…if you want to go your individual way, it is the way you make for yourself, which is never prescribed, which you do not know in advance, and which simply comes into being of itself when you put one foot in front of the other. If you always do the next thing that needs to be done, you will go most safely and sure-footedly along the path prescribed by your unconscious. Then it is naturally no help at all to speculate about how you ought to live. And then you know, too, that you cannot know it, but quietly do the next and most necessary thing.”
“…In every littlest thing you do in this way, you will find yourself. [Everyone has] to do it the hard way, and always with the next, the littlest, and the hardest things.”
Notice that Jung said your unconscious will tell you what the next most necessary thing to do will be. Your inner compass gives you the direction.

Go forward 86 years to 2019 and listen to the lyrics of the song, “Next Right Thing” from the movie Frozen II. Some of the lyrics are:

This grief has a gravity
It pulls me down
But a tiny voice whispers in my mind
‘You are lost, hope is gone
But you must go on
And do the next right thing’…
…And with the dawn, what comes then
When it's clear that everything will never be the same again?
Then I'll make the choice
To hear that voice
And do the next right thing.

Who would think that decades apart a psychiatrist and a children’s movie would both be speaking about listening to our inner compass? They would both be speaking of our path forward. The path toward self-discovery led by our unconscious. Our inner voice. Our sense of intuition. Our inner compass.

Whether it is a little voice, a twinge in your heart, a tightening in your stomach, goosebumps, shivers, tingling, chills, or a knowing- your inner compass has a way of communicating with you. It catches your attention and nags at you until you listen. And every time it is telling you to do the next most necessary thing. The next right thing.

When you listen and follow the directions you will feel content. Life will feel right. When you ignore your inner compass long enough you will feel off balance, uneasy, and continually feel like something is missing or wrong.

Your inner compass doesn’t lie. Do you listen?
                               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                  Pennie’s Life Lesson:
                                            Listen to your inner compass.
     Do the next most necessary thing – even if it is just taking one step forward.
                                  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

“What if we have been forced to slow down? To listen. To see things again- the things we take for granted and the things we miss in our hurried lives.”

I was feeling lonely, isolated, and confused. It was three weeks into the Covid shutdown of 2020 when I wrote a column titled, “What If?” I wrote about all the things I was missing. Hugs from my family, lunch with my friends, date nights with my husband, and running to the grocery store without thinking about risking my life. It was an unusual, frightening, and confusing time.

One day I ventured outside for a walk. A walk that spurred me to write this:
                                                    ~ ~ ~ 
I looked up to the bluest sky I have ever seen that was speckled with cotton-white clouds. In the silence of not hearing traffic or the noise of daily life, I heard birds. Birds singing glorious songs with their choir of friends. I saw carefree bunnies scampering through yards. 

It felt slow. 
It felt quiet. 
It felt peaceful. 
It felt fresh and new. 
It felt different.

What if this is the message of this virus? The message to slow down. To listen. To see things again- the things we take for granted and the things we miss in our hurried lives.
What if the speed at which our life and world had gotten to was spinning so fast that we were heading for an implosion? What if this is it?
What if we needed a shake-down? A wake-up call to be grateful for what is important.

As the days go by, I realize how grateful I am for simplicity. How grateful I am for food, water, and the shelter of my home. How grateful I am for the security of love from my family and friends. How grateful I am for dinner and movie dates with my husband at home with our sweet dogs snuggled next to us.

I realize what I miss. I miss smiles and hugs. I miss cheek kisses. I miss the touch of my loved ones and voices that are not muffled by technology. I miss the freedom to move in whatever direction I desire.
The uncertainty of not knowing how or when this will end is nerve-racking and I don’t have the answers. I do know that the most important lessons are taught in the most difficult of times. I do know that the sky is bluer, the birds are singing louder, and the world has slowed to a pace that we need to remember when this time of hunkering down ends.
What if it is time to listen to the quiet?
What if it is time for you to take a walk?
                                                 ~ ~ ~

That was four years ago. Some thrived in the quiet and the slowing of time. Some felt financial and mental pressure to the point of disaster. Either way, life changed.
Relationships changed. People got divorced. People got married. A spotlight was put on mental health care. The way work is done changed. Working remotely and flexible work arrangements became more common and acceptable. The supply change disruptions of food and products caused us to plan better and adapt and adjust to cost, availability, and delivery times.

For me, I believe the most important changes are the ones I feel. The time of quiet and solitude that the pandemic forced us into has become a memory. The learnings of being grateful for what we have and slowing down the out-of-control speed of our lives have faded. I feel an undercurrent of anger and a weakening of trust. Uncertainty has become a feeling we carry. Skepticism and suspicion nip at our feet. The speed of life is back or even increased, and we cannot predict or prepare for where it is going.

It has been four years, and now more than ever we need to realize that we are all in this life together. I still believe that the most important lessons are taught in the most difficult of times. And I feel these are difficult times.   

What if we have already forgotten the lessons?
What if this is still the message? The message to slow down. To listen. To see things again- the things we take for granted and the things we miss in our hurried lives.
What if the speed at which our lives and the world move is still too fast?
What if it is time for you to take a walk, find some quiet, and once again be grateful for what is important?
 
What if it is time to remember what we have so quickly forgotten?
                               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                  Pennie's Life Lesson:
            The most important lessons are taught in the most difficult of times.
​                                          ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

​I think a lot about life.
The highs and lows.
The successes and failures.
The pleasures and pains.
The suffering and celebration.
We travel through these stages at different times and for different reasons, but we all travel through them.
 
I remember a time when my children were young and the innocent moments of floating on air mattresses on the lake or living room floor picnics held the magic of the simplicity of happiness. Hard struggles were happening in my life, but in those moments I didn’t notice. My head was up enjoying the sunshine and the flowers of my life. When things are going well even weeds can look like flowers and life seems grand.
 
I also remember a time when my dad was suffering from a terminal illness at the same time my son was struggling in life. I was so deep in the weeds that I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t think. And at times I gasped for a breath. Good things were going on in my life during this time, but I couldn’t see them. My head was down, and my heart was buried in the weeds. When life is difficult it is as if the weeds smother the flowers and hide them from our view.
 
I have witnessed this many times in life- in my friends, in my family, and in myself. It may be the loss of a loved one, loss of a job, or a physical illness that causes us to become so lost in the weeds that we hunker down pulling ourselves closer to the dirt of the situation. We tuck our hearts inward for protection and close our eyes to block the pain. In doing so we become deeply lost in the weeds.
 
When life is so heavy with heartache it is hard to see the flowers. They are there, but the burden of carrying pain makes it difficult to look up. Every step is a step through the thickness of weeds. The roots are tough and treacherous wrapping themselves around our ankles and the stalks grow tall and surround us so that all we know, all we feel, and all we see are weeds.
 
The reality is life is a mixture of flowers and weeds. Some years we have gardens full of bright colors, blooming in our lives. Some years we have more weeds and are bogged down in the trenches of walking through them. We all get a combination throughout our lives.
 
The longer we live the more distance we have to look back on. The miles of happy times and the rough terrain of pain. When we look back, we see from the vantage point of an experienced observer. We can see the pattern of life and the lessons we have learned.
 
There have been many happy times in my life. There have been many times of sadness and pain in my life. I have now come to a space of understanding that we need both. Both happy and sad. Both the weeds and the flowers. We will all face suffering and setbacks. Without pushing through the weeds, we would not appreciate the delicate beauty of the flowers. We will all experience joy and love. Without the flowers we would not be motivated to survive when we are lost in the darkness of weeds, knowing that beyond the difficulties of life, there will be the sweet blooming once again.
 
Start thinking about life.
The highs and lows.
The successes and failures.
The pleasures and pains.
The suffering and celebration.
 
Where are you standing in life?
Are you lost in the weeds or are you smelling the flowers?
                                             ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
                                                       Pennie’s Life Lesson:
                        When you are lost in the weeds, begin looking for the flowers.
                                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

​When was the last time you were angry? How long did the anger last? Sometimes when you are angry for a long time you can’t even pinpoint what you are angry about, so you become angry about everything.

To identify the core reason that you are angry, you need to ask one question… What are you afraid of?

For example, are you angry when your spouse shows up late for your work event? Or are you afraid your boss will notice? Dig deeper. Are you afraid your boss will notice or are you afraid you will be embarrassed when your boss notices? Being embarrassed may be one of your biggest fears, so anything that happens in your life that may cause you embarrassment will light that fire of anger.

We build walls to protect us from our fears. If someone tampers with our walls our fears strengthen. Our mind tells us, “I knew it, my fear is coming true.” Anytime the wall gets bumped the protective reaction is to fight. We get angry. Your spouse being late was never the reason you were angry – your anger was a reaction to your fear. You feared being embarrassed.

When you struggle with what you are afraid of you create your suffering. Your suffering will only last as long as you let it. Repeat - Your suffering will only last as long as you let it.

Pinpoint what your fears are. Remember times in your life when you have been angry and examine it until you find the basis of fear. After you find one, keep digging, what else are you afraid of? Once you know your core fears, take down the walls. When you do, you will learn to control your anger and not let it last long. You will still have experiences that may trigger your fears, but you will begin to see them as part of life. You will begin to see that everyone has fears, and everyone learns from them.

Let’s look at filling in the blank in other ways. If you are tired, being tired will last as long as you let it - until you rest. Loneliness will only last as long as you let it. Disappointment will only last as long as you let it. Do you see the pattern? You are in control.

Now this is where it gets good. Flip this in the direction of happiness. What if you realized that happiness will only last as long as you let it? Let’s say you are at your wedding or a holiday celebration. You feel happy. But what is making you feel happy? What is the core reason for your happiness?

Are you happy because of the decorations, the party clothes, or the cake? Is it the presents that make you feel happy? When you dig deeper, you may find that what makes you feel happy is the feeling of love from family and friends. When you pinpoint the core reason for your happiness you will understand how to control it.

When the wedding or holiday celebration is over, your happiness does not have to end. Just because your family and friends are not gathered in a balloon-filled room, doesn’t mean they don’t love you. Knowing you are loved by them becomes a core reason for you to be happy every day. Happiness will last as long as you let it.
Fill in the blank with positive emotions. Joy will only last as long as you let it. Peace will only last as long as you let it. You have more control over the emotions you feel than you believe you do.

We can’t control everything that happens in our life and there will always be ups and downs, but if you want permanent happiness and permanent joy you must understand the core reasons for your happiness. You must learn that these core reasons are with you all the time, not just situationally. It won’t matter if it is a Monday, if the weather is gloomy, or for whatever reason you have allowed to take away your happiness in the past.
Remember, happiness will only last as long as you let it.  
                            ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                 Pennie’s Life Lesson:
           Once you understand the core reasons for your emotions,
                              you will have the power to control them. 
                               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

​YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                                                 Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2024 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.