When was the first time you felt like you belonged somewhere? Does the memory push you all the way back to your childhood? Your family? Elementary school?
When was the last time you felt like you didn’t belong? Was it recent? Were you embarrassed? Sad? Lonely? Afraid?

Are you part of a group, a team, a school, a club, a crew, a tribe, a family, a religion, a generation or a community? Of course you are. We are all affiliated in some way to a collection of others with a common interest or bond. Humans have a need for inclusion and connection. We fear and avoid isolation. So we join. We conform. We wear the uniform. We know the handshake, the secret knock on the door and the private password.
 
We are taught to mirror the actions and mannerisms of another person so they accept us as a reflection of themselves. We want acceptance and approval. We want to fit in. It is why as a teenager you may have tasted your first beer when you were at a party with friends. You probably hated it but kept sipping it until the taste was tolerable. You felt like you belonged. You felt like you were part of the cool kids. 
 
We mimic the actions of others because we don’t feel worthy to be accepted and included unless we do. We adapt and accept the expectations that the group has for us to be a member. 

Some of this is necessary. In kindergarten we learned how to stand in line, raise our hand, wait our turn and share in order to function in a space of civility and kindness. As we grew, we learned the basics of polite and compassionate living to be accepted as a member of our human society. 
 
For many people the need to belong is an instinct - a requirement for human survival. It can push us to act in ways that feel uncomfortable or are out of character. When we bend and mold ourselves to be such a contorted version of who we are that we don’t recognize our own reflection in the mirror, it becomes a problem. 

What if we could be ourselves? Our crazy, goofy, wild authentic self? 
What if we looked at each other not with our eyes, but with our hearts? Can you drop the expectation you hold for yourself and others and be open to the exploration of who YOU are… of who THEY are? 
 
Stand in your own light and learn to accept yourself. Find the people who will see YOU and love YOU. You may lose some people from your life who only liked you for who you were pretending to be. But when you step into your light and let yourself free to be who you really are, you will attract the people who should be standing with you. You will attract the people that love and adore the real you. You won’t have to work so hard to fit in. You will finally feel like you belong in a way you never have before.  
 
Pennie’s Life Lesson: When you allow yourself to be the authentic person you really are, you will attract the people you are meant to be with.

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

​My grandson drew a picture with a caption that read,
 “Peace Feels Like Sitting in a Warm Chair”
At six years old, he understands his Place of Peace. It is a place where he feels safe, loved, centered and warm. His place of peace is in the safety of a chair with the sun warming his heart and looking into the magical wonders of the ocean.

At a time when the news is filled with the opposite of Peace, our children – and all of us -- need the security of knowing what Peace feels like. We need to know what Peace sounds like. We need to know what Peace looks like. We all need to know where our place of Peace is.

When I saw my grandson’s drawing, it reminded me of my meditation chair. It is growing old and tattered and with the wisdom of age. It has become softer, safer and stronger.  It has held me for years of long hours of meditations, journaling and prayers.  The spirit of these practices layer into every aging wrinkle of the chair’s fabric.  I feel a sacred sense of love and kindness every morning as I sink into its safe arms… settling into my Place of Peace.

What does Peace feel like to you? Where do you feel safe, loved, centered and warm? How often do you visit this sacred space to relax your heart and center your soul? If nothing comes to your mind, it is time to find your sacred space. It is time to find your place of Peace.

Find a place to nestle into like a baby bird nestles into a feather-lined nest. It may be a space in your home or backyard. It may be your favorite coffee shop. It may be a park or library. It may be the top of a mountain after a long hike or floating down a river in a kayak. Or it may be a beach chair with the sun on your face as you look into the wonders of the ocean. You may be one of the lucky ones who has honed the ability to close your eyes and shut out the outside noise to find your place of Peace within - anytime and anyplace.

Everyone has a different idea of Peace. It doesn’t matter where your place of Peace is. What matters is that you have one and you visit it often. It is in this quiet reflective space that you rejuvenate your ability to live in the moment you are given. To relax into the humanness you were meant to experience.  To tune into the inner calmness without the distraction of the world outside of us.

For me, I agree with the wisdom of a six-year-old, - Peace makes me feel loved, centered and warm.  Peace Feels Like Sitting in a Warm Chair.

Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Find your Place of Peace. Visit it often.” 

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

Goals. We hear about them all the time. Goals at school. Goals at work. Goals for the new year.  Goals for our finances, our love life and our status. Goals, goals, goals!

This is not a lecture on how to write a goal and stick to it. I want you to think about the goal that matters the most – your Soul Goal.  

You may already be neck-deep in your life goals. You are probably already measuring them, tracking them and think you have everything under control. Yet, are you experiencing a little gnawing inside? Is there a tiny whisper nibbling at your heart?  Has it been there for years, but you have hushed it?

That whisper is your Soul Goal. The good news is this is one goal you don’t have to write down, track or measure. You just need to listen to your heart because it is already there.

I believe the soul is the script of all we have been and all we will be. It has drama, action, comedy, heartbreak and love coded into this personal documentary. Yes, there is an intended outcome to the story. I believe the ending to your script is to successfully learn how to love yourself and others. The Soul Goal is our personal method of how we accomplish that. 

Have you always had a desire to paint, work with animals or heal? 
If we are here to learn how to love ourselves and others and your inner desire is to paint, then you learn to love yourself by painting. By painting you create art that is a gift you can share with others. In doing so you touch their hearts. You love others by creating your art.

If your inner desire is to heal, you may become a doctor, nurse, counselor or Reiki Master. You love yourself by following your inner voice and by doing this you heal and love others. You touch their hearts. You love others by healing. 
Do you see how this works? Your Soul Goal is the technique by which you reach the outcome of loving yourself and others. 

Listen to your whisper. Pay attention to the gnawing. If it is unclear what your Soul Goal is – pay attention to when you feel the most alive, happy and content. This is the criteria for your Soul Goal. This doesn’t have to be difficult. 

I am a writer and a speaker. While working through other careers in my life, the whisper and the gnawing was always there. I would attempt to incorporate snippets of my Soul Goal into my work. I would speak about my work topics and I would write heart-filled stories and give them as gifts. I knew when I was doing this I felt the most alive, happy and content.

My Soul Goal is simple. It is one line: To share my life lessons through speaking and writing.  In the process, I love myself by doing what makes me feel the most alive. I love others by reaching out my heart to touch theirs.   
  
I’m not suggesting you give up all of your other goals. School, work, family and life goals matter. I’m not suggesting you quit your job to become a starving artist.
What I am suggesting is that you listen to your heart as it whispers your Soul Goal. I am suggesting you find a way to incorporate this whisper into your life.

You don’t have to create ideas that you format into action steps and turn these into strategies and objectives. None of this is necessary. You can tiptoe into accomplishing your Soul Goal.  Take a painting class one night a week. Volunteer at an animal rescue center or a nursing home.  Whatever your whisper is calling you to do, find a place and begin.

Remember, your Soul Goal makes you feel alive, happy and content. It should be fun! It should bring you joy! It just takes loving yourself enough to do what your soul is asking you to do.

Pennie's Life Lesson: When you fulfill your Soul Goal you feel alive, happy and content.

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

Years ago when my husband and I were dating I learned a powerful lesson. He would occasionally say something like,
“I need a couple of days.”

What? I immediately took this personally and thought something was wrong. What did I do? What did I say? He must be angry at me. I would call him and stop by his house to see if he was okay, after all I must have said or done something to upset him. He would assure me I hadn’t and that it didn’t have anything to do with me or “us.”

I soon realized he was right. It didn’t have anything to do with me. It didn’t have anything to do with us. He was not angry. He was not upset. We just have different ways of recharging. He needs downtime. He needs a quiet respite to rest, relax and regenerate. He needs to do this alone.

For me, when I need recharging being alone makes it worse. I feed on the energy of being with people. Talking, laughing and companionship regenerates me, so of course when he would tell me he needed time to himself I felt pushed away. I thought there must be a problem. I took it personally.

How many times in life do we take things personally and the reality is that it has nothing to do with us? Whenever a stressful situation occurs many of us default immediately to the negative. We blame ourselves.

Let’s look at it differently. Let go of the immediate assumption and realize it isn’t always about us…it could always be something else that causes someone to be cranky, in a hurry or snap at us. It can always be another reason that someone needs time alone. It isn’t always about us.

Here is a trick to help with this self-inflicted internalization of blame and stress. Use this with your family, spouse, children and coworkers. Q-tip it! Yes, Q-tip it! Quit Taking It Personally!

As a reminder, take a couple of Q-Tips and tape them to your computer, your bathroom mirror, or your car visor. Look at them often and when something happens in life that sets off your internal blame game, remember to Q-Tip It!

The lesson I learned from my now husband all those years ago has saved me from many hours of needless worry. It isn’t always about me. And guess what? Now we recharge using what works for both of us. We recharge together, laughing, talking and in the quiet space of each other’s companionship.
We practice of the art of Q-Tipping It.  
​
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
                       “When the stress of life sets off your internal blame game, Q-Tip It! 
                                                           Quit Taking It Personally!”

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

I bought one ticket.
I bought the large popcorn and drink combo.
I sat in the last row. Middle seat.
I had never done this before.
 
There is something about seeing movies in a theater. The big-screen mesmerizes me. The sound swallows me. The popcorn tastes like it could be the last gourmet meal of my life – to me it’s that good. I love going to a movie theater, but I had never in my life gone alone.

There was a movie I wanted to see. The timing wasn’t right. No one wanted to see it with me, so I thought I would have to wait until it was out as a rental.

The movie chased around in my thoughts. It was about someone who had lost a child like I have. Of course, that is what drew me to it. The common thread. The curiosity. I wondered if the movie would portray my thoughts and feelings. I wondered if I would learn something I didn’t already know about grief. It followed me around pulling my heart along, not allowing me to push it away. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to see the movie.

Driving an hour to the shopping area, my whole body smiled. The entire day was mine. A day of “me” time. After a little shopping and lunch at my favorite place, the movie flashed in my mind.  I quickly looked on my phone. It was playing at a budget theater nearby and I had just enough time to make it there. But…I had never done this before -- gone to a movie alone. Is that weird? Is it weird that I am kind of afraid to do this? Is it strange that this movie has such a grasp on me, constantly taking space in my thoughts? My fear played ping-pong with the movie. 
The movie won. 

The back row wasn’t bad. It felt safe. No one could see me – or the giant bucket of popcorn I balanced on my lap. At 1:00 in the afternoon on a weekday there were 6 other people there to share my theater. None of them came alone. Except me.

I shut off my phone. Two hours went quickly. The movie was amazing. I cried. I hurt. At times I wanted to shout at the screen. There were moments I wanted to pray. I understood why I needed to see the movie. The message was for me.

I sat in my seat until the last credit rolled, the lights were bright and the workers came in to clean up any abandoned popcorn buckets.

A few things became very clear.

It was clear to me that I would not have received the message the movie brought to me if I hadn’t listened to my heart pushing me to see it.

It was clear to me that although going to a movie alone may seem like a silly fear to some, it was real to me. Walking into that theater was empowering. It was clear I had missed opportunities in my life when I allowed fear to win.

It was clear to me that I did need to see the movie. I needed to see it alone. I needed to be able to cry alone. I needed to absorb the meaning of the movie’s message - alone.

Life is magical how it manipulates us, bringing us messages we need to hear, putting us in places we need to be, pushing us to do things that we are afraid to do. All of it is done with the intent of giving us clarity.   

And yes, I ate the entire bucket of popcorn.

Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Listen when life is pulling, pushing and prodding you to do something that stirs fear. Until you walk into it, you will never fully gain understanding, clarity and strength.”

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 [email protected]. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​