​When I was pregnant, I wrote love letters to my babies.  After they were born, I continued this on their birthdays, Christmas or other days that I felt I had something to share with them.  Some were ushy, gushy with words of adoration.  Some were letters of frustration when I felt like I was failing and flailing in the world of motherhood.
This week is my son, J.T.’s 34th birthday and the 12th year he has celebrated in heaven.  Every year I write about him to celebrate his creation.  I thought this year I would write a letter “TO” him. 
​~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My J.T.,

I have written you many letters beginning when you were part of my body.  I knew you would be the last soul that would share my human space.  I wanted to feel every kick, every roll and every heartbeat.  I continued writing to you until you passed from this world.

Today it is time for me to write you one more letter.
​
Thank you for the sparkle in your eye when you were born that lit my heart and frightened me at the same time.  Thank you for choosing me to be your mom for the 22 years that you were given on this earth.  

​Thank you for your patience with me as I stumbled through the journey of motherhood.  My attempt was not always pretty, not always right and far from perfect.  Thank you for understanding that being a mom is a learning process where I hold pride for the times I was successful and regret for the moments I can’t do over.

I am sorry for any moment of your life that I (or anyone else) didn’t make you feel accepted, loved or cherished.   You never deserved to feel anything less than the special gift you were.  You were Good Enough!  You were more than that… you were extraordinary!
​
It took years of trying to get you to understand the correct way to live before I realized you were teaching me that there is more than one path to follow in life.  You taught me that not everyone needs to follow the societal expectation of going to college, getting married, having 2.5 children, driving a minivan, owning a house and a 401K.   I came to realize that if you can buy your own lunch and are happy then who am I to insist on what trail to take?
​
Thank you for filling my life and my home with music.  When J.T. & The Basement Boys played downstairs my house shook with the vibration of joy. And when you sat alone on my patio playing your guitar and singing, my heart melted with the depth of your talent. ​

​
Thank you for your daughter.  When you told me you were going to be a dad at such a young age, when you weren’t doing a great job of taking care of yourself, I was afraid for you.  When you came out of the surgery room carrying that tiny bundle with the same sparkle in her eye that you had she lit my heart and freighted me at the same time.  She was nine months old when we said goodbye to you.   I held her tightly then and continue to do so now- grateful to have a glorious piece of you.  Thank you for teaching me there are no accidents in life.  Your beautiful M&M is supposed to be here because you aren’t. 

Thank you for the hard lessons in patience, acceptance and forgiveness. Thank you for the wondrous lessons of joy, gratitude and love.  All of which you and I must have agreed to accomplish in a space and time prior to being joined in this life.  This bound us together so deeply that I felt what was happening (good and bad) in your life before you told me.  Our hearts shared thoughts and a mystical silent language.

Thank you for understanding my meditation, my thoughts on the Universe, life, death and everything in between. 

​Thank you for our last in-person conversation when we sat in IHop eating pancakes and doodling pictures of ourselves on scrap paper.  Not drawings of our outward looks but our inner souls. You were so intent when you listened to me explain how we shouldn’t look at how tall or short, how large or thin a person is – that we should look deeper at their spirit and their soul. 
​
​You laughed when I drew a star for myself and put sparkles on it because I like stars, diamonds and sparkly lights.  We watched the people come in and out of the restaurant and described their souls. 

The conversation was about life, God, and love.  It was deep.  It was strong.  It was powerful.  You were introspective in a way I had never felt before. 
​You knew.  You knew you were leaving. 

​Thank you for the dreams, the manipulation of music, electronics and license plates that you use to send me delightful messages from the magical space you are in now.  At times I feel you brush by me and stop to give me one of your unmistakable glorious hugs that only you could share – and I thank you for that.

I believe souls are joined to help us understand the value of love.  My love didn’t stop on the day you left.  My love has grown every day from the first moment I knew you were part of my body and continues to grow with every breath I take.  The golden cord that I believe connects a mother to her infant is not severed at birth.  Nor is it disconnected at death.  The thread that connects my heart to yours holds strong.
​
​The tattoo that says, “Love, J.T.” in your writing that I carry over my heart reminds me of what I always told you – we are joined at the heart. 
Always have been.
Always will be.
 
I Love you so,
                           Mom

​Dear Special Friend,
​
I have struggled with the concept of being Good Enough my entire life.  I have written about it and it is one of my main speaking topics.  I order my Good Enough cards by the case and have given hundreds away. 
 
Yesterday was one of those days that I felt FAR FAR from Good Enough! 
It began by me trying to sew on my sewing machine.  I hadn’t used it in several months and I immediately plugged it up with thread. I had to take it to the sewing center to have it fixed and receive a lesson on how to use it. 
 
Then I looked in the pool room and a plant had fallen over and there was dirt everywhere!  So, I think well, while I clean that up, I will multitask and put bleach in and add water to the pool.  I put the hose in the pool and turn the water on too fast.  The hose quickly reared up like a cobra snake flopping around striking at me and soaking me while flooding the room. Now I had 2 messes to clean up. And a load of towels to wash when I was done. Also, during the chaos of chasing the hose monster, bleach splattered all over me ruining the new top that I was wearing. 
 
Later, things settled down and I was telling my husband about my crazy day.
Then, I almost killed us!  
I had the Instant Pot on the ceramic stove top warming up the leftover roast I made the day before.  I had turned a burner on to make gravy.  We were sitting at the table eating salad, when I began smelling something.  Thinking the gravy had boiled over I jump up to see smoke bellowing out of the Instant Pot.  I had turned the wrong burner on- the one UNDER the Instant Pot!  It totally melted the bottom off the Instant Pot.  I unplugged it, grabbed it and ran to the garage.
 
It could have blown up as the entire bottom was melted off and all the electrical insides were exposed.  Melted plastic covered our stove top and I thought it was damaged beyond repair.  Our entire house filled with smoke - probably toxic from melted plastic- so now I am sure we all have cancer. Every window in the house was open and all fans were on for hours.   Our dogs hid in our bedroom far away from the craziness.
 
I wrapped the Instant Pot in a green yard bag and plunged it to the bottom of the garbage can while my husband worked for an hour on the stove top. He scrubbed and scraped until he had removed all the melted plastic and polished it like new again - he is a miracle cleaner!  
 
We ate a bowl of cereal and I went to bed with a blazing headache.  
~ ~ ~
Today is a new day.  
Although, I am still beating myself up for being stupid, not thinking, doing dumb things.... yes, self-talk is devastating!  
As with most of my life experiences this has turned into a shareable moment in the form of this writing for all to see. I realize how lucky I am and that many people would love my life even on one of my worst days, but yesterday I felt like a loser and far from even close to feeling Good Enough. 
I want you to know that no one has a perfect life.  Stress, frustration and accidents happen to everyone.  
Even I have days that I am challenged to still Love My Life- NO MATTER WHAT! 
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
Pennie’s Life Lesson: “We all have times of stress, frustration and feelings of not being Good Enough. – Love yourself and your life anyway!”  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ​

YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to admit that my life is not perfect.  I am not perfect.  I am just like you! I have days where I am challenged to love my life! 
​Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.

YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to release the expectation of perfection during this holiday time.
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below .  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                Thank you! ​
               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2018 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.

***In preparation for the new year ahead, I thought I would remind you to be thinking of your "One Word" for 2019.  Here is a revisit to the word I picked in the past.  I will let you know what my "One Word" for 2019 is the first week in January.  

    I HELD JOY
   IN MY HAND

I purchased holiday door hangers that said, “JOY” for my friends and delivered them with notes that held my wish for them to have Joy in their lives for the New Year.

I found a special ornament that said “JOY”during a shopping adventure, brought it home and hung it in a prominent place on my tree.

I even read the popular book that taught me how to declutter my closet by keeping only things that bring me “JOY.”

Every year I choose a word.  A word that will guide my life for the next 12 months.
This is different than a resolution.
It doesn’t cause me guilt or shame when I give up the diet I promised myself I would maintain or the exercise program that typically lasts a month.

This is a word I try to live by for a year.
I begin thinking about it around November.  Some years I struggle to find the perfect word.
Last year it came to me during a meditation.
This year it slapped me right in the face.  Over and Over and Over again. 

It took me a while to catch on.
Why did I decide to read the book in November that caused me to begin really thinking about what does bring me JOY?

Out of all the thousands of ornaments for sale in the stores, why was I drawn to the one small JOY ornament to bring home for my tree?

Why did I choose the JOY door hangers for my friends?

While shopping a few after-Christmas sales it flashed before me like a beacon guiding me to open my eyes.  Everywhere I turned in the mountains of left over holiday items covered with words, sentiments and greetings - JOY jumped at me.

One piece pulled me closer with intentional force.  I reached through the crowed isle to pluck the simple glittery word from the shelf.
I stood in the middle of the store holdingJOY in my hand.
At that moment the golden statement sunk into my heart. 

   THE WORD IS JOY! 

JOY had been trying to reach into my life in small and quiet ways.  It had been whispering to me,
      “Wish ME to your friends,
       bring ME into your home,
       allow ME to fill your heart!”    

The in-my-face synchronicity was not to be ignored.
    THE WORD IS JOY!
    MY WORD IS JOY! 

I brought the golden JOY home and hung it in my office as a reminder to live the New Year in JOY.
To only bring things into my life that bring me JOY.
To seek experiences that bring me JOY.
To share JOY with others in every way and every day.
To be mindful enough to learn what really does bring me JOY and love myself enough to settle for nothing less than a JOYOUS life and a JOY-filled year!

Feeling very satisfied with my decision, I moved on to my daily routine of opening the mail.  The last envelope was a holiday card that had most likely been delayed in delivery.
I reached in the red envelope.
The silver glitter covered card reflected the sun magnifying the message into a blinding validation.
The card had one simple word on it- JOY!
Of course it did….
   THE WORD IS JOY! 
                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Love yourself enough to know what brings you JOY and welcome it into your life!”  
                     
                           ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to experience JOY in the new year and share it with others.  What is your word for the new year? 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below .  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                Thank you! ​

   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
         All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2018 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.

​It held my children, grandchildren, cousins, neighbors and dogs. It has been a rocket sliding down a hill, a snow wagon and a photo prop.
It caused laughter, delight and joy.  It caused fights, bruises and tears.

I am not even sure if I remember the day it arrived in our home.  Most likely it was delivered in a sleigh by a man in a red suit.  I do know the sled has been around for decades. 

I ran across it in my garage propped in a corner.  The runners once bright and shiny red looked rusty.  The wood worn, the original twine colored rope long ago replaced by a red version.

With the outside temperature too cold to turn on the garden hose, I did the next best thing – I brought it in the house.
I gave it a shower.
Leaning it against the tile I took the shower sprayer down and began cleaning off the years of neglect. 
​
As the cobwebs ran down the drain I saw my children – dressed in snowsuits, hats, mittens and boots.  Hardly able to move due to the layers of protection. The only skin showing was their faces with the glow of their cold blushed cheeks. 

The water poured brown and dirty as years of memories flashed through. 
​
The year it was taken to the lake while the men ice fished and the kids would take turns having sled rides across the frozen water.

The hill that seemed Alpine-big and served as the daredevil challenge for those days when the sled was ridden until little fingers were frozen and the draw of a warm bath and hot chocolate waiting at home became strong enough to end the fun.

The year my brother’s St. Bernard pulled the sled filled with squealing kids across Grandma’s yard.

Drying the sled off, I rubbed the runners to polish every inch while memories continued to reach every corner of my heart.

The way I felt as I watched my three most important loves, hearing their squeals of delight as I held my breath hoping they would reach the edge of the snow safely.

The way I ran to them when an unseen rock would derail their speed causing a tumble, a spill and tears.
The arguments over who would get the next turn.

Tying greenery and a plaid bow around the wooden slats, I remembered…
The day my daughter perched her babies on it to snap the perfect holiday  card photo.

The Sled.
​​Now instead of the dirty corner of the garage, it stands in a place of honor next to my antique sewing machine surround by twinkling lights.
The red and green bow a crown of appreciation for work well done.

I walk by it and see those chubby snow kissed faces.
I hear the squeals of joy.
I think of how my children are grown and their children are taller than me.
I wonder how time has slid by so quickly --
year by year,
snow by melting snow,
and one quick ride down the hill at a time.
             ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Pay attention to the little things in life
​     – they slip and slide by quickly.” 

YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to think about the special memories in your life...what object spurs them?
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below .  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                Thank you!  
                   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                              All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2018 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.

TYPOS ARE NOT TATTOOS 

Through the magic of text messaging I was ranting to my daughter about how I had found a typo in one of my Facebook posts.  Text only posts are impossible to edit.

I was upset with myself, after all how could I have missed something so simple and hit the post button which instantly transported my mistake to the world of Facebook and its billion users? 

After a few back and forth acronym filled interactions, she hit me with, 
          “It just shows u r human and anyway 
             people are already liking your post.” 

We were both traveling in different parts of the country and I had little time to fuss with it, so I closed my Ipad and went on with my day. 
But—the typo continued to harass my mind.  Her text, “It just shows u r human,” played mental push back to my self-inflicted criticism.  

Then it hit me – she was right! 
It was just a typo.
A slide of my finger that hit one letter over from the one I intended.
One hit of a key on my keyboard.
It wasn't as if that one keystroke was going to be tattooed on me as a permanent mark of shame across my forehead that read –
            "I MADE A MISTAKE!"

In an hour it was lost in the stream of Facebook banter and hardly noticed.  The Facebook users who received it had let it go in minutes, maybe seconds, and continued to move on through the river of messages that flowed through their screens.
So why didn't I let it go as well?

How many times in life do we turn simple forgettable "life typos" into permanently inked tattoos that mark us for months, years or longer?
So much of our life dramas are really small insignificant issues that we allow to be blown into tragedy by telling and retelling the story of how it happened, criticizing ourselves for why it happened and bemoaning the outcome as if it were a monumental life changing event.

Most of them are not.

We need to know when to call a typo just a typo and not a tattooed mark of shame
We need to allow ourselves to be seen as human. 
                              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
          “Release the small mistakes in life
                        – allow yourself to be human.”
                   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ​

​THE GRACE OF GRATITUDE

During this time of thankfulness I ask that we, together, place our hands over our heart center and recognize how different we are –and yet very much the same.

Whatever religion you align with or light that you follow –we can all move together toward a common goal of gratitude.

As you hold your hands over your heart center, recognize that whatever our talents, our dreams, our backgrounds, or our life situations we can all join in the grace of gratitude. 

Be grateful for our individuality and also for our common bond;

Be grateful for our families and friends who are with us and those who have gone before us;

Be grateful for animals, plants and all living things that love, nurture and nourish us;

Be grateful for our occupations and the impact our work has on others – and ourselves;

Be grateful for the beauty that surrounds us created both by nature and by human hands;

Be grateful for the smallest of moments and the grandest of experiences;

Be grateful for our bodies that carry us through the lessons we are here to learn; 

Be grateful for our breath and the rhythmic in and out of our life power;

Be grateful for the flow of pure love and the spirit of life that runs through us. 

May our love be strengthened and our lives be broadened as we move together - in grace - toward a common goal of gratitude.  

Blessings to us all. 
             ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Allow the flow of pure love and the spirit of life that runs through us all to fill you with the Grace of Gratitude.”
               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~

    IT ALL COUNTS
​
I came back from my walk frustrated. 

     “I forgot to wear my pedometer, so I’m
       not getting credit for my steps!”

My husband heard my grumbling and responded with,
     “It doesn’t have to be counted by a  
       pedometer.  Your body knows and gives
       you credit for it.”

He was right.  Just because a little tech device wasn’t calculating my steps and chiming when I hit 10,000 didn’t mean it didn’t happen. 

It made me think of how this relates in so many ways to our lives. How many times do you tell yourself stories like these…

   ~ If no one sees me eat a donut then the calories don’t count…. Wrong - your body counts them.

   ~ If I am speeding it is ok as long as there isn’t a police officer in site…Wrong – accidents happen when you speed and then the police will arrive.

   ~ I don’t have to show up for school or work today, I will just study and get my project done so it doesn’t matter if I was there…Wrong – It does matter.  Other’s notice if you don’t ‘show up’ for them.ALWAYS, ALWAYS, show up!

   ~ If I think negative thoughts  it’s ok as long as I don’t say them out loud…Wrong – thinking negative thoughts is just as damaging as saying them out loud… all that negative self-talk counts.

   ~ I don’t have to tell someone I love them, they should know.  Wrong again, don’t ever miss an opportunity to tell someone you love them.  Life is precious and brief.  There will come a time when it was your last chance to tell them.
​
   ~I’m busy so I can rush by people and not take the time to acknowledge them, thank them or be kind… Wrong! Showing kindness and gratitude makes a difference.  You put out energy with every action.  By projecting kindness and gratitude you put positive energy out into the world to be felt and mirrored back to you.  What you project you can expect. It all counts!   

Every step we take, every move we make, every word we speak counts – even if no one sees us do it, hears our words or charts our progress. It counts!
 
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Every step we take, every move we make, every word we speak counts – even if no one sees us do it, hears our words or charts our progress. It counts!”
                    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~

YOUR TURN...         
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to understand everything we do, think and feel counts.  Our actions, our thoughts and our emotions add up and make a difference! 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                         Thank you!  
                   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
​                                   All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2018 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.