Every year I make name card holders for the grandchildren’s Christmas table. It makes dinner special as they find their assigned seat and giggle over what is holding their name. A few years ago, I had a grand idea of using snowman ball ornaments on top of three candy canes and the loop of the candy cane would hold the name card. My grandson, Riley, is always so excited about holiday decorations, so I asked him if he would like to help me make them. After a visit to Hobby Lobby in search of small candy canes, scouring the lights and decorations, and a stop for lunch, we went home to create! We found the photo on the Internet of a similar idea and started unwrapping candy canes. I thought it would be awesome. Riley was skeptical. It didn’t take long to realize that Elmer’s glue on candy canes creates something like peppermint slime. Who knew candy canes and glue don’t mix! My mind quickly began thinking of what I had in the house to improvise and save this disaster. What will look like a snowman? What will not melt with glue? What will make me look a little less like a loser in the eyes of my grandson? Well, when all else fails, bring out the marshmallows! Big, GIANT marshmallows! I thought it would be awesome! Riley, who by now had eaten enough candy canes to have rosy cheeks and watery eyes from a little too much peppermint, was still skeptical. By the end of the afternoon, we had used toothpicks and glue to attach the bodies, stood them on a base of red and green felt, given them ribbon scarves, and added buttons. It wasn’t until I broke a toothpick in half and pushed arms in the first little puffy man that I saw Riley smile. “Now, that is CUTE!” he said. We had snowmen! Once again, I had received a lesson in acceptance. My idea of the perfect card holder failed. It took a little flexibility to improvise a new concept. They were not perfect. But by the time Christmas dinner was ready the marshmallows were hard as stone. The snowmen stood strong with the name tags sitting in front of their fat bellies. My grandchildren laughed and compared who had the funniest snowman. Since then, I have made gnomes out of old makeup containers, painted pinecones, and this year will be small shiny red and green bells that will be shaken and rang to the point of irritation to all the adults. What I have learned is to be flexible. Flexible with my expectations. Flexible with my creativity. And Flexible with the outcome. Peppermint slime and marshmallow snowmen taught me a huge lesson. Card holders, like the entire holiday, don’t have to be perfect. If there is laughter, if there is joy, and if there is love, there is success. Pennie's Life Lesson: Holidays don’t have to be perfect. Flexibility in the process may turn out to be the best part of all. YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information.
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"Relax and allow the process of life to occur." When I said that to a friend of mine, I felt the intensity of her response ripple up her back forcing her to stretch upright and lean forward. "Relax and allow life to occur? What about work, my kids, my husband? We have basketball games on the weekends, ballet practice after school, I volunteer on Wednesday night, my husband is out of town for work this week, and my in-laws arrive for a visit this Sunday. I have gifts to buy and wrap, cookies to bake, and my tree isn’t even decorated. Relax? The next thing you are going to tell me is to sit with my legs crossed and just be. Are you crazy?" I could see she was desperately trying to control the pace and rhythm of her busy life. By doing this the scope of her world was overwhelming her. I know the symptoms of overwhelm because I see them often and I have felt them many times. The symptoms are typically similar - the tired, drawn look with heavy under-eye circles from skimping on sleep; the extra 10, ok, 15 lbs that are always trying to be lost, yet increase due to eating on the run; the endless checking of emails, texts, and phone calls; the continual list-making of tasks and responsibilities required to get through the day and the week; and the quick defensiveness of why all of it is necessary and important. This causes life to be crazy and out of control. Sitting with legs crossed is not necessarily the answer, although the “just being” part is close. This continual out-of-breath pace that life forces us to run is counter to what we are meant to do. When we are out of breath, we cannot allow life to occur, let alone relax to a place of enjoyment. Breathing is important, but remember the only breath that is significant is this one; the one we are taking right now. The last one is over and the next one has yet to fill our lungs. And it won't unless we successfully inhale and exhale the current one. You see, you can't take more than one breath at a time and the only important one is the one you are breathing right now. If you use this concept in life you will learn to slow down and experience one event at a time. View each event and experience as a breath. Just as you will begin to focus on the breath you are taking, you will also begin to concentrate on the event you are experiencing. . . not the ones on your list for tomorrow or the responsibilities you have to others. It is this breath right now, this experience right now that is important. Life will unfold. Maybe not in the vision of perfection that you hope, but it doesn’t have to be. You may be surprised to find that you CAN relax and allow life to occur. Pennie's Life Lesson: "When you focus on the moment you are in, you can relax and allow life to occur." YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. Today I donated my old Christmas tree. For three years I have wanted a new tree. I had become annoyed with the amount of glitter and white artificial snow that fell from it. I would find it all over the house well past Valentine’s Day. I had become frustrated that I could never fit it back into the tree box the way it came out. The days that I put it up or took it down became days of dread that left me looking and feeling like a glitter-covered wrestler that had lost the match. For three years when the stores clearanced all holiday items after Christmas, I looked for a new tree. One that was easy to assemble. One without glitter or snow. One that I felt was beautiful enough to take over the role of center-of-attention for my holiday season. For three years I failed. This year I didn’t wait for a clearance sale. This year I began searching the ads right after Halloween. I visited stores. I took photos of trees I thought I would like. I studied assembly options, light lumens, and branch counts. Then I found her. The perfect 7’ 6”, 800 light, 4,335 branched tipped queen of my future holidays. She sits in my living room all aglow displaying shiny blue ornaments and family memories. The decorations sparkle enough that I do not miss the glittered snow branches of my old tree. I am in love with her. I didn’t want to let go of the old one until I had the perfect new one. Now sufficiently in love, it was time to say goodbye to the glittered glory of the past. Her box is tattered and not worthy of the sweet tree inside. I printed a photo of what she looked like in all her grace when she is up and decorated. I taped it to the old box, so the new owners would understand that the container was not an indication of what was hidden inside. As I searched for the perfect photo and relived memories of the last ten Christmases, I remembered the year she came into my life. She was an after-Christmas clearance find. I remember the January day I brought her home being so excited I put her together just to see how beautiful she would be for the next year’s holiday. She dripped glitter and snow on the floor, but I didn’t care. She was stunning. I carefully put her away and waited in anticipation for the December snow to fall and the sound of jingle bells to fill the air so I could bring her out of the box to decorate her. I saw photos of her that first year where she reigned like a queen surrounded by beautiful packages and shiny ribbon. I saw photos of her with new babies and toddlers laying under her in awe of the magic held in sparkly lights and holiday secrets. Family photos of us perched in front of her. Photos of our sweet dog who is no longer with us and new dogs with red bows and holiday sweaters posing patiently in front of her. I felt guilty that I ever grew tired of her. I felt shame that I was giving her away. My heart hurt. To the new owners- I hope you love her, enjoy her, and take care of her. I hope you realize that the energy of our family goes with her. The love, the joy, the compassion of us lives in her branches and her sparkly white lights. It was time for her to leave us, but every light of her works, and she still has enough glitter to sprinkle joy in a new home. Be gentle with her. Cherish her. And maybe you can find her a new box worthy of a queen. Pennie’s Life Lesson: Objects carry memories and the energy of love. YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. You planned for a year. You sent out invitations, ordered a cake and said “Yes” to the dress. The day comes and it is spectacular. It is the fairy tale wedding of the year. Even the honeymoon was perfect. And then, you came home to a new life with a partner and Now What? Now, things like laundry, negotiating finances, and toothpaste in the sink become reality and you are not adapting well. You didn’t plan past the wedding cake. You brought home one or two, maybe more, sweet-smelling bundles from the hospital. You bathed them, fed them, and nurtured them through talking, taking their first step and all the steps after that right until they walked across the stage- cap and gown on, tassel dangling and your pride beaming. You help them pack their car, you make sandwiches for the road, and tuck cash in their hand. The door closes on your child as they drive off to a new life leaving you in an empty nest and Now What? Your purpose has just driven away and what will you do now? You didn’t plan past parenting. The turkey is bought, or jellybean baskets are filled, or the tree is up, and presents are wrapped- whichever holiday it is, you have prepared for the fun, food, and family. The house is filled with laughter and joy. The day after comes and Now What? The house is quiet and empty. Your heart sinks from sudden loneliness. Your festive holiday adrenaline is drained and has puddled on the floor. You didn’t plan past the holiday. The dreaded school reunion is 6 months away, so you work out, diet, lose those 30 pounds, and fit into that little black dress. The day after comes and Now What? You sleep in because working out is overrated, a cheeseburger and fries sound good for lunch- after all you haven’t had them in 6 months and so it goes. Soon the little black dress is tucked in the back of your closet with the other too small clothes. You didn’t plan past the reunion. It happened. Rehab. A little too much drinking, pills, gambling, or whatever your addictive vice is. You can do the 30-60-90 days. You do the counseling, the group sharing, the journaling, and inner work. The day comes when you finish. Your mind is clear, your body cleansed, and the world looks bright and possible again. And Now What? You return to the old life, the old friends, the old habits, and you are pulled further and further away from the protection of rehab and fall into the familiar arms of your vice. You didn’t plan past 30-60-90 days. This is how we do life. We look at the gold ring. We reach for it. We get it. And then what? We don’t plan the next step. We don’t plan the next goal or the maintenance of our accomplishment. Without planning past we will suffer from the slow slide back into the darkness of depression, or relapse into old habits and routines. Planning past should become as much a part of your process as your steps to success. Plan past the wedding cake – visualize and talk about how your shared life will be. Plan past parenting. Do not curl into a tight ball of depression disappearing into your empty nest. Look at it as a new adventure, time for YOU to fill this newfound space with the experiences YOU want to pursue. Plan past the holiday, so that after the presents are gone, the tree is put away and leftovers are eaten you have scheduled what is next on your calendar to fill the quiet. Plan past the reunion. Don’t lose weight for a specific moment in time. Get in shape for yourself, your health, your longevity. You will look and feel great for every event… not just one reunion. Plan past a program. The 30-60-90-day programs might work for the time you are there, but you need a life program. One that doesn’t end when you walk out of a facility. One that is engrained in your belief system 100%.... then it becomes YOUR program. Your way of life. Your success! Be proactive. Look at your life in long-term successes. Short-term goals are great steppingstones, but to be successful in life you must not look at a goal as the finale. Always be prepared and have a vision for what comes next. Only then will you walk a life-path of achievement knowing that each successful step you take creates a trail of confidence behind you and a road of determination ahead of you. Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Don’t stop when you reach a goal. Plan past the achievement. Have a vision for what comes next.” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. I have always been fascinated by hands. The chubby hands of an infant. The strong hands of a man. The gentle feeble hands of the elderly. The power, the history, the stories that are held in the lines and scars of hands. The sanctuary of holding hands around a table of prayer. Whose hands do you hold? Whose hands comfort you when you are in sadness? Whose hands are thrown up in the joy of celebration when you succeed and pat you on the back with the comfort of encouragement? When I look at my hands, I see the continuation of my grandmother. The reflection of her mirrors me with the same fingers, wrinkles, veins, and lines. I see my hands hold the frosting tube the way she did as she taught me to create roses for a wedding cake. I see them cup during meditation the way hers folded for prayer. The language of hands goes far past waving goodbye, clapping for joy, or the blowing of kisses. Hands go straight to the heart, the head, and the mouth in immediate reaction to cover our pain, our cries, and our sorrows. Our hands carry impressions of our ancestors; the work they did; the burdens they carried; the imprint of who they lifted and who they pushed down; the strength of who they fought and who they protected; and the love of who they reached for and who they let go of. Our hands hold the heart-print for generations of the future. The calluses and the gentleness are saved like the treasures we tuck in our pockets, to be reached for and pulled out by new hands. What we feel and have felt lodges in the lifelines of our family palms. The top of my hands with the wrinkles and veins brings me to a place of respect for the hands that came before me -- who they held and who they loved. The palms of my hands are the soft newness of generations ahead waiting to experience and explore. The spaces between my fingers hold the secrets of the past and the anticipation of the future. I am careful of what I hold with my hands. Dirt is never completely washed away as my hands melt into the hands of the future. I am intentional with who I hold with my hands as the love will pass forward as a compass for compassion. My hands are my grandmother’s hands. I guard and cherish my hands with reverence for the past and hope for the future. Whose hands have you been given? ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie's Life Lesson: “Our hands carry impressions of our ancestors and heart-prints for generations yet to come." YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. It’s that time of year again. You know, the time when you wear color coordinating outfits, sport fresh haircuts, display shiny smiles, and hug each other for that family photo. The photo that goes on the cover of the holiday card that you mail to your friends and family. Who is in your holiday photograph? Is it a photo of one or a frame for two? Is it the first photo with the new pink or blue bundle that makes you a family of three? Does it include grandparents, cousins, grandchildren, aunts, uncles, and the family dogs and cats? Is it a group picture of your circle of friends? You may hate this tradition. The matchy-matchy uncomfortable clothes. The inconvenience. The idea of creating a Norman Rockwell portrait of a happy family just isn’t your favorite way of spending an afternoon. However, think about the people who would give anything to have a family, or even one person, to stand next to and pose for a holiday card. They probably dream of their fantasy family. They can visualize the smiles and feel the love they wish for oozing out of the picture. They dream of who they would love to have in their photograph. Many of us have lost a loved one we wish were still here to be in the photograph. Some of us have fractured families. Families separated by geography, illness, division, divorce, or death. If it hasn’t happened yet, there will come a time when the family photo changes. There will come a time when grandparents are gone, children move away, and change happens. When this takes place, the photographs of past years become precious possessions. A snapshot of a time that will never happen again. A moment that becomes a memorialized memory. Right now, if you are lucky enough to have a spouse or family that is planning a family photo shoot and they want YOU in it, stop begrudging it. If no one is planning it, jump in and be the planner for your family or your group of friends. Orchestrate the occasion. Get that haircut. Wear matching colors or crazy sweaters. Stand in front of the holiday tree, cozy up on a couch, or kick up some dirt in an empty field. Cross your fingers that the babies don’t cry, and the dog sits still. Smile the biggest smile you can conjure. Make fun poses. Crazy poses. Be happy. Be joyful. Be proud. Create a memory. Understand how lucky you are to have someone standing alongside you in a photograph and in life. Understand how lucky you are that someone wants YOU in their holiday photo. Be grateful. And when next year comes around, do it again. Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Don’t miss an opportunity to stand with those you love. Take the photo!” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. “Let’s name her SPIKE,” J.T. said with a grin as he dangled a tiny black spiked collar in front of me. “We are not naming this cute little puppy that will be all of 12 lbs full grown, SPIKE!” I snapped. My son’s grin told me that was the point- the humor of a tiny fluffy Shih Tzu with a name that conjured visions of an attack dog. She was named Yogee, and yet even after both my son and Yogee passed away, everyone remembers the Spike story that followed her through her 15+ years. The sadness of losing a pet after that long opens up a thought process of do we want another dog? Can we handle puppyhood? Did we want the responsibility? When should we think about it- is it too soon? Can we handle saying goodbye in another 15 years? Loss is hard, but with everything in life, as they say… the beat goes on. The heartbeat of love and life goes on. I researched Shih Tzu breeders and found three, in three different states. All of them had a detailed process of applications and background checks before they considered the forever homes for their puppies. The waiting lists were 9-12 months, so I filled out the applications and put it out of my mind. The crazy chain of events that happened next was, I believe, Grace in action! It began with a simple text message from my daughter that read: Brady just said, “Yogee is in heaven and Grandma is going to get a new Yogee puppy –on TUESDAY!” Is he correct? This made me chuckle coming from my 4-year-old grandson. I responded with, “Well, everything except Tuesday… maybe late summer.” A few nights later I had a dream that Yogee had puppies next to my bed. The dream was clear, in color, and felt like it was REAL. I reached down and picked up a white and copper brown one – the color I hoped for in my next Shih Tzu. I knew there were other puppies in the dream, but I could only see this one. Yogee was walking away. I called to her saying over and over again that she needed to come back and take care of the puppies. She just shook her head and kept walking away as if she knew I would do it. The extraordinary clarity of the dream spurred a long conversation with my husband the next morning about what it meant and why Yogee brought a puppy to me – the exact color that I wanted. couple of days passed, but the comment from my grandson and the dream lodged in my mind. Watching TV one evening, I received an email to my phone from one of the breeders saying she had a female puppy available and wanted to know if I was interested. The picture attached was of a white and copper furball of cuteness. It was her eyes that drew me in. As I stretched the screen on my phone I saw familiar eyes. They were Yogee’s eyes looking deep into my heart. Tears welled and I heard the word, “Grace.” Not wanting my husband to see my tears, I forwarded the email to him. I waited for his reaction. I saw him enlarge his screen to see the very thing I saw. The eyes. He looked at me and said, “What are we going to do?” I didn’t know. We had resigned ourselves to wait and allow the loss of Yogee to settle. To enjoy a bit of freedom without the responsibility of a dog. And yet, the messages were clearly being laid before me. My tears surged with every conversation about this puppy and with every photo the breeder sent. The messages continued. We were told this puppy was the runt of the litter. After sleepless nights of caring for the tiny pup and worrying about her ability to survive, the breeder wanted to keep her. Deciding she shouldn’t, she scanned her large waiting list reading the profiles of prospective families, and kept coming back to us. When we found out that the puppy’s mother was named Beah, I knew. I ran to the scrapbook I had created for Yogee and pointing to the registration papers I showed my husband. Yogee’s mother was named Bea! We made arrangements to visit the puppy. A sweet woman invited us into her home. She picked up the smallest of four puppies and laid her in my lap. She called her, Emma – mysteriously close to the name of my granddaughter Emmie – the daughter of J.T.my late son. She said, “There is something special about this puppy. I tell everyone I believe she is an angel.” The day we adopted her our home filled with joy. We heard the patter of paws running on our floors. We enjoyed snuggles and cuddles and puppy kisses. I was convinced she was brought to us through the mystical process of grace orchestrated by J.T. and Yogee … a process others may not understand or comprehend, but to me it was clear. We named her Gracie Beah. The next morning, I took her to my daughter’s home so Gracie could meet her family. As I was leaving I told them all to say goodbye to Gracie. Hugs and kisses irrupted and the last in line was Brady, the one who predicted the arrival of a puppy. He kissed her, looked in her eyes and said, “Goodbye Spike, Spikie, Spike.” Stunned, I asked him why he called her that. He had no way of knowing the Spike story. He simply shrugged and said, “I just felt like it.” My daughter and I smiled at each other. The last message had been given, and yes, the beat goes on. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie's Life Lesson: "Pay attention to the magical messages of Grace." ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. We don’t take time to celebrate. I know, you are thinking – What? We celebrate all the time! Yes, we break out the ice cream and cupcakes to celebrate birthdays and holidays, but we need to “cupcake” the little things in life. Do you take time to notice the things you are grateful for? Do you celebrate them? Every second of every day we are surrounded by things to celebrate. Some are obvious. A promotion at work or the birth of a baby are the green fields for the dance of celebration, but let’s dig deeper. I don’t think there has been a morning of my life that the sun didn’t rise bringing with it a glorious splash of love and light. That is cupcake worthy! The first smell of spring, the flower squeezing between two rocks to find the sun, or the smile on the face of an elderly woman as she watches a toddler walk – cupcakeable! The smell of coffee in the morning, the kiss on the cheek from someone you love, the note from a friend that says they are thinking of you, the tail wagging greeting from your dog and sliding into bed on clean sheet day – yep, cupcake with sprinkles! Watch for these moments and even sweeter, try to turn frustrating moments into a cupcake moment. It may be a red light that stops you when you are late for an appointment, but what can you celebrate as you take a breath? It may be that the pause that forces you to calm down to take the breath is worth a celebration in itself. A spring storm may require you to add snow shoveling to your already busy day, but those white snowflakes are crystals of beauty and the moisture will guarantee the green burst of spring in your yard. Do you see how you can turn frustrations into celebrations? Now, I’m not suggesting you start baking cupcakes on a daily basis. None of us have time for that and our waistline wouldn’t thank us for it. But imagine a cupcake celebration in your head when these wonderful life moments occur. Who doesn’t like a party? You can create one just by paying attention to these delightful moments. The mental confetti will spill, the balloons will bounce, the champagne glasses will clink with a “cheers it” as you begin to cupcake the small things in life. Begin now! Start taking time to celebrate freely. The month of gratitude has begun. November is the perfect time to celebrate gratitude. Do you take time to notice the things you are grateful for? Do you celebrate them? I call November my month of gratitude. Every day I pick someone, a place, an experience…something I am grateful for. I talk about it, share it on social media, and publicly celebrate gratitude. Join me by celebrating this month of gratitude! What will you cupcake today? ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie's Life Lesson: Take time to celebrate the small moments in life – cupcake them! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. Are you tired of being in the decision parade? Every day we make decisions about: What clothes to wear; should we walk or bike to work or school; do we stop to get coffee and once there do we want coffee, latte, cappuccino, one shot, two shots, decaf or regular; what meetings do we attend; which project do we work on; which applicants do we hire; which emails do we respond to; which Facebook posts do we read; and should we Tweet? Take a breath. And then. . . After work do we exercise and what does that look like? A walk, Yoga, do we use a home gym, do we join a gym, do we Bow Flex, CrossFit, or go straight to Insanity? And then it is time for dinner, but wait! Are we Vegetarian, Vegan, Raw, Atkins, Paleo, South Beach, Keto, or should we be in the Zone? After all that we just want to relax and watch T.V., but how do we decide between the 800+ channels, thousands of movies, and hundreds of shows available at the push of a button. Take another breath. And then… If all that doesn’t give us decision fatigue, step back and look at the big picture of life decisions: What school to attend; what degree to get; what career path to take; who to date; should we get married or stay single; should we have kids and how many; should we buy a house- which house or should we rent; what car to drive; what friends to associate with; which charity to support; which sport to like and which team to cheer for; how much money to save and how- 401K, bonds, stock, mutual funds, CD’s, banks, or under our mattress? When we accomplish all of that, where should we retire? WHEW! No wonder we live with our minds swirling so fast that we need small computers that fit in our hands to keep all of these decisions organized. And yes, we must decide which one of those smartphone computers will work the best for us! No wonder we live in a perpetual state of exhaustion. This type of nonstop decision-making creates a mental fatigue that can be more harmful to our health than physical fatigue. It wears on our nervous system and pushes our emotional well-being to the limit. STOP! What if we just stopped? Sit still. Sit quietly. Don’t make one decision. Close your eyes. Your body will breathe on its own- no decision necessary. When that breath is complete, your body will take another and another. It requires no thinking on your part. You just need to allow yourself the time to break free from the chaos that captures your mind and spins it into the cycle of what, who, why, where, and when questions. Instead of a question, give your mind a word. A word that you say with every breath. Peace. Calm. Quiet. Love. These are all words that work well. Breathe in your word. Breathe out your word. Give yourself permission to relax and restore. Give yourself a break to disengage from the decision parade. Be at peace for five minutes or an hour. You may just decide to make this part of your day. Pennie's Life Lesson: "Allow yourself to disengage from the decisions of life and breathe in the presence of being here now.” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. You may have taken a career test to see what occupation would be best for you. You may have taken a personality assessment as part of a job interview or filled out a profile on a dating site. All these tests and assessments are trying to find out one thing… What are you looking for? Do you know the answer to that simple question? It is harder than you think. A version of this question is repeated throughout your lifetime. It begins at an early age in school when you are asked, - what do you want to be when you grow up? When you register for college, you are expected to pick a school of study that will lead to your future career. Job interviews ask what you are qualified for. Salesclerks in a shopping mall might ask if they can help you. Questionnaires, people, and institutions, are always asking questions without getting to the core issue… What are you looking for? Many people wander through life - browsing, sampling, and testing the water. When asked the magic question, most people can immediately come up with a list of things they DON’T want or are NOT looking for. These answers come from past hurt and disappointments. Many of us go through our entire life searching without knowing what we are looking for. Without a map, a guide, a list of wants and needs, we will never know what we are looking for. If we don’t know what we are looking for, we will never find it. What are you looking for in a career, a lifestyle, and an income? What are you looking for in a life partner, a family, and a future? What are you looking for in retirement? Instead of following a career path because it is what your parents did or what they expect you to do, visualize what you want in life. What are you looking for? Instead of finding a partner through happenstance, you should be clear on what your definition of a perfect spouse or partner would be. What are you looking for? Instead of assuming retirement means you are old or not of value, you should be clear on your own expectations of what you have left to accomplish and enjoy in the famous golden years. Decide what you are looking for without allowing the number of candles on a birthday cake to limit your vision. We need to ask ourselves the right question – What am I looking for? Sure, there are non-negotiables that you will not settle for or allow into your life. But until you flip the mindset from what you don’t want to the positive side of what you do want you will never have a clear understanding of where you are going. We all need to know what we are looking for. Until then we continue to wander. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie's Life Lesson: If you don’t know what you are looking for, you will never find it. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. I opened the door and the assortment fell on my head. I picked them up off the floor, grabbed the step stool, and climbed up to shove them all back into the overflowing cabinet like I had done hundreds of times. As I jostled and pushed the bowls, pitchers, and pickle containers back into the black hole of plastic, it occurred to me –WHY don’t I let go of the Tupperware? Thirty years ago Tupperware parties were the acceptable girls-night-out. We all took turns hosting the gatherings where we listened to the sales pitch, ate cake, drank coffee, and shared the secrets (okay, gossip) of the day. Then we ordered the obligatory plastic items. At the time it seemed expensive, but the justification came with the durability of it, the perceived usefulness of it, the cool factor of the new products, AND the lifetime guarantee. It was virtually indestructible, but if some major mishap did occur it would be replaced. Along with this came a free add-on with every item - guilt. I am convinced it was molded into each piece during the factory creation. It was an unwritten code that you WOULD keep it forever. After all, the investment... the lifetime guarantee…and someday you will need it! What do you have in your home that you won’t let go of? What ties up the space in your heart and mind that is bound with the guilt of investment and a someday but, never-to-be-used promise or guarantee? Is your closet overflowing with clothes? Is there an unhealthy relationship in your life? Are you in a job you hate? Do you hold a victim story in your heart that you retell over and over? The Tupperware of our lives comes in all forms. We invest in all of them with time, money, and energy in the hope of a future payoff. And then there is the elusive guarantee of need –someday, of weight loss – someday, of love – someday, of a promotion – someday, and someday this victim story is going to explain why everything happens to me. Maybe it was the 700th time of having a load of hard plastic fall on my head that finally spurred me to make a change. Maybe it was the recognition that it will never wear out, so the guarantee doesn’t matter. Maybe it was the realization that I will never use it – not even someday. The 'why' doesn’t matter. Now it is packed in a box ready to be donated. My cabinet is organized, clean, and clear. My guilt is gone. I feel free! What is the Tupperware in your life? When will you let go of it? ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie's Life Lesson: We have things in our closets, hearts, and minds that we hold on to in hopes of "someday." YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. I have been called Pollyanna, Susie Sunshine, optimistic, positive, and perky throughout my life. I accept all of those as terms of endearment, when actually at times they have been said in a teasing way. I will admit to being a glass-is-full kind of girl. You know that saying, “Walk a mile in my shoes?” Well, I am asking you to, “Walk a Mile in My Smile.” I am far from perfect, and I am not perky and positive every minute of every day. I have down times, sad days and occasionally become angry. But I am asking you to join me in the upside of walking in my shoes. I will admit to having the advantage of being blessed with a high happiness set point. This means I seem to keep a fairly high stance of happiness no matter what. When I do have the occasional gloomy, sad, inner rain, my body fights to regain its natural value of happiness. But above that, I have learned to live with the habit of happiness. I have several rituals that I have used over the years to support this habit and they enable me to stay fairly true to my happiness set point. Here are just a few of these happiness enhancers that you may like to try. Begin each day with gratitude. When your eyes open in the morning, take some time to lay there and be grateful for waking another day, for the bed you slept in, for the sleep you enjoyed, and for the day ahead. As you swing your feet off the bed for that first step of the day, say “Thank” as you place one foot down and “You” as you place the other foot. As you walk throughout your day, say “Thank you” with your steps. Subconsciously your mind will begin to fill in the blank of thank you for _____. As you are driving to work or to a meeting say, “Thank you” out loud for the meeting you are about to have, for the successful outcome, and for the positive interaction you will have with those involved. When you go to bed at night, instead of lying there running through the list of things you didn't get done or should have done differently, go through a mental list of thank-yous for all the people, places, and things that enriched your day. An added bonus to this is if you have problems sleeping this will help with that too. Why would you count sheep- that you don’t even know – when you can count the people, places, and things that you love? I bet you are noticing a pattern here. Yes, I believe the secret to my glass-is-always-full outlook is appreciation. If we appreciate every step we make, every breath we take, and every interaction we have there will be little space left for negativity and anger. Even if you have little to appreciate – begin there. Appreciate that. Be grateful for that. Say thank you for that. As your appreciation grows so will your happiness. As your happiness grows the love you hold on the inside will spill to the outside and soon you will be walking miles in your own smile. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie's Life Lesson: ““As your appreciation and gratitude grow so will your happiness!” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. I fell down. I am not sure how, but my entire body fell to the ground. My knees took a hard hit followed by the rest of my body as it stretched out on the dirty concrete, sliding (less than gracefully) until I put my hands out to stop myself. My suitcase and purse fell over next to me. Lying on my belly, arms reaching forward, and my legs behind me in a childlike Slip-n-Slide position, I stopped. I was confused and stunned. There were no signs of a hole or bump, nothing that I slipped on. I just fell. By definition, a free-falling object is an object that is falling under the sole influence of gravity. That was me. One minute I was thanking the shuttle driver, handing him a tip, pushing my suitcase, and the next minute I was flat on the dirty concrete. I felt like a fish that had just been taken out of the safety of its pond and thrown floundering on the shore. I quickly got up, told the shuttle driver I was fine, and moved toward the curbside check-in. Every step I took was slow and precise. After dropping my suitcase off I found the first restroom in the airport to see if my knees were intact under my jeans and wash the dirt off my red sore hands. Minor scratches were all my body incurred, but my ego and confidence were silently damaged. I sat on the plane during my flight reliving what happened -how it happened and why it happened. I didn’t have the answers, but I knew I felt vulnerable. I thought about all the falls I have taken in life. Memories of my struggles, the setbacks, the self-inflicted pain, and the pain from uncontrollable circumstances raced through my mind as I relived the years of my life. This fall reminded me of all of them. It also reminded me of all the tears, the fears, and the lessons learned from each one. There is no such thing as a free fall. All falls come with a price. They all hurt. None of them are easy. Lessons don’t always come easily. The price of a lesson is often the pain of our falls. I am grateful that I wasn’t really injured. I know a broken wrist is common when you put your hands out to stop a fall. The way my knees hit I could have damaged them. I could have hit my head. My scuffed knees and sore hands will heal, and my confidence and ego will recover. Another lesson learned. We have all fallen in many ways. Falls happen in life. Most happen when we least expect it. We don’t see it coming. We free fall, pulled by the force of gravity landing face down in the dirt. We aren’t prepared. The best we can do is slide through it as gracefully as possible, pick ourselves up, wash our hands, and keep going. This is how we learn. It is in the falling, failing, and floundering that we move forward. Pennie’s Life Lesson: “The price of a lesson is often the pain of our falls.” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. I had just completed a deep conversation with a group of people I trusted. Trusted enough to share a personal situation in my life that I just could not wrap my head around. I told them how I had tried everything to manipulate it into a good outcome. It wasn’t working. During the lunch break as we were going through the buffet line, a woman’s voice in my ear said, “You think you are pretty dang powerful, don’t you?” I was startled as I turned to see a woman from the group that just heard my story. She saw the look on my face and then went on to say it again. “You think you are pretty dang powerful. So powerful that you can change people, change their situation, change how their story will end. Well, you don’t have that kind of power.” Before I could gather my thoughts enough to respond, she turned and walked away. The nerve of her! Who does she think she is, saying something like that and walking away, I thought as I plunked a large scoop of potato salad - that I had no intention of eating- onto my plate. Her comment was shocking. Her comment was rude. Her comment was hurtful. Her comment was 100% correct! I didn’t have the superpower that could control another person. I didn’t then and I don’t now. None of us do. Believing that we can, will only create stress and tension between people. Everyone does have one superpower that we use every moment of our lives, but we don’t always use it for the highest good. We all have an amazing, powerful ability to capture emotion – and by doing so, we can spur emotion in others. With one word, one action, or one small gesture we can stimulate happiness and joy. Our words and our actions hold a superpower of expressing contagious emotions. When we allow this power out, we can create emotions in others. Today, it seems, that many people are using this superpower in a negative way- spurring anger, hate, and fear. Then in turn the person who receives this uses their superpower to pass it on and it spreads like a wildfire burning and destroying all the joy and happiness in its path. After that buffet line smackdown, I went back to my situation and stopped trying to manipulate the outcome. I put my energy into the one thing I could control – me. I became mindful of how I was using my own superpower. I couldn’t change the path or outcome of the others I was worried about, but I did change how I reacted to it and how I interacted with them. My friend was wrong about one thing… I do believe we are all pretty darn powerful. We all have a superpower. We need to learn how easy it is to put our power in motion to create a positive effect in our lives and project that to others. Be very careful with your power. It is strong. Don’t use your superpower in a negative way. Use your power for good. Concentrate your energy on kindness, joy, and love. And soon you will see just how powerful you are! Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Use your superpower for good. Promote kindness and love, then watch how it magnifies and multiplies in your life.” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. Marion is an eccentric combination of Annie Oakley, Gloria Steinem, and Shirley Temple. Like Annie Oakley, Marion understood tough times and learned to work hard in order to become financially successful. In the 1860’s Annie, changed ideas about the abilities of women. A century later, Marion did the same. Both had the courage to prove that a woman could stand her ground in the world that men controlled. Marion, a single, teenage mom with an 8th-grade education began waitressing in a small cafe bringing tips home to provide for her infant son and mother. Over the years she gained her PhD in the ways of life eventually purchasing the cafe, bars, supper clubs, and even a construction company. Like Gloria Steinem, she was not afraid to speak up and voice her opinion -even when it was unpopular. She continues to be a strong advocate for women and doesn’t shy away from a discussion about her political views. I’ve seen Marion lock in a business deal during dinner, strongly expressing her opinion about the details of the agreement and then, just as easily changes her composure, blinks her flirty eyes, and giggles with the impish playfulness of a young Shirley Temple. Marion is a force to be noticed. Marion is my mother-in-law. I delight in listening to the stories of her younger years when purchasing property was done with a handshake and over-bearing men were no match for her. She tells of how she has made money, lost money, felt success and experienced desperate times. It was during one of these stories that I heard her make this profound comment, “I never really looked at my glass as half full or half empty. I always thought my glass was filling up!” That statement should be on T-shirts, coffee mugs, and tattoos! That is not just optimistic – that is living a life of expectation. A life of adventure. A life of anticipation-- of learning from whatever waits around the next corner. What if we could all see life that way? The next time you believe you are having a bad day or living through a challenging time think of it as your life just filling up. Filling up with experiences to learn from. Allow your cup to fill with all life has to offer- the good and the challenging. I hope for Marion, for me, and for everyone that our cup of life continues to fill until that very last drip tickles the rim and runs down the side. And when that happens, we all wink, giggle, and with an impish smile know that our life was full! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie’s Life Lesson- “Your glass is not half empty or half full – it is always filling!” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. Those brown eyes. I will never forget those brown eyes looking at me. He was sitting in his truck as I told him I loved him, said goodbye, and walked away. It was the last time. We were at a gas station, my car parked in front of his truck as we both filled our tanks. I paid for his gas. It was the last time. We met for breakfast that morning. IHOP was busy as we slid into our booth. I don’t remember what spurred it, but I remember the conversation. Every. Word. Of. It. I told him how I believe we are all energy, and we shouldn’t look at people for how tall or short they are, what their weight is, or how smart they are. We should look at them for their energy. What the energy of their soul looks like. I had a scrap of paper in my purse that I took out and drew a star. “This is what I think I look like,” I said as I added sparkly dots to the star because I like jewelry and sparkly things. Then the game began. On the edge of the morning newspaper, we drew people as they entered the restaurant. Not their face or body, but the way we thought their energy looked. Pancakes arrived and the paper was pushed away, but the conversation continued. “You know, I believe our energy never dies,” I said, thinking about my dad who had passed just two years before. I pinched my thumb and finger together, leaving a whisper of space between the two. “I believe grandpa is still here. I believe there is only this much space between where he is and us.” His eyes looked intently at me as I patted the seat of my booth and explained that I believe he is right here next to me all the time. “The energy of grandpa is always close to us and we can talk to him and be with him whenever we want to. “I said. “Do you really believe that?” he asked. “Absolutely! I think grandpa is in a magical place that we can’t even understand… but we will someday.” He was enthralled by this conversation. I was thrilled that he was interested in my beliefs and my way of seeing life, death, and everything in between. When the pancakes were gone and the waiting area was bustling with energy-filled people, we decided we should let someone else have our booth. As we walked out, I said, “I need to get gas in my car, if you follow me, I will fill your tank too.” “Are you sure?” he said with one of his huge smiles. I watched him in my rear-view mirror as he drummed his steering wheel and bounced to the music he was listening to. The vision of the energy that was the soul of my son struck me as a shining light bigger than I could draw on a piece of paper. I never felt more connected to him than I did in that moment. Our tummies, our tanks, and our hearts were full. We hugged. A deep hug that neither of us wanted to let go of. Then he got in his truck. I walked to my car and got in looking back at his eyes still looking at me. It was the last time. I often think of memories of my son and the trail always takes me to the last time I saw him, the last time I touched him, and the last time I heard his voice. I knew the value of that moment was life-changing at the time, but I didn’t know the profound memory that it would become. It has been 14 years. Every year I write about him on his birthday and the anniversary of his relocation to heaven. I will always talk about him, write about him, and remember him – over and over again. It will never be the last time. Pennie’s Life Lesson: “The true value of the moment is in the memory it becomes." ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. Have you experienced an event that seemed like an amazing coincidence? One that you couldn't shake from your mind and you believed there was more to it than mere chance? I believe that when occurrences happen without a direct trail of cause and effect and yet make a profound impact of significant connection that there is more to it than chance, happenstance, or accidental association. Carl Jung studied these meaningful coincidences and coined the term “synchronicity.” I watch for these moments in my life and recently one of my readers shared her experience. She wrote: " . . . I totally believe in signs and such. Went to my local Goodwill and there was a Pennie Hunt "Good Enough" coffee mug, right there calling to me and reminding me that I AM Good Enough. Thank You for being, well, you and sharing your story and message. . ." She went on to explain that she took the mug home and interpreted it as a very positive sign during a challenging time in her life. My Good Enough mugs are peppered across the country and some have even traveled across oceans. The idea that this person was a follower of my work, found herself struggling in life, and came across one of my mugs with the message that she IS Good Enough at just the time that she needed to hear it - is lovely synchronicity! Yes, I did wonder who was giving my mug to the Goodwill, but even that has a magical synchronicity to it. Obviously, someone had passed on the mug without knowing it was at just the perfect time for it to become available to the person who needed to hear the message of hope. There was no intentional cause-and-effect in motion, yet it was a trail of simultaneous events with no discernible connection, and the outcome was significantly and meaningfully related. I know there are those out there who will bring out their calculators to argue statistics and probability theorems of how this mug traveled to her community and ended up on the shelf at her local Goodwill. I feel compassion for them and honor their beliefs, but I see a magic of life that they are missing. I believe that our outer world will lie before us what our inner self requires. When this realization is adopted, our job is to listen and pay attention. Pay attention to the magical, meaningful coincidences that become the serendipitous synchronicity that brings life to life. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Watch for meaningful coincidences that relay messages of significant connection – Synchronicity!” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. As I was unloading my groceries, I talked into the speaker of my phone spilling out all the errands, work, and obligations that had filled my day. Pulling out a box of tissues from a shopping bag, I realized I had purchased the wrong kind. “Oh good grief, I ranted. These aren’t right. These aren’t the cooling lotion kind we like. This is just great!” My ranting was interrupted with the voice on the other end of my phone conversation saying, “Well, if that’s the worst thing that happened to you today, I’d say it was a pretty good day!” The understanding of that comment stopped my rant mid-sentence. I have had days that the worst thing that happened was devastating. I have had days when my life changed in an instant and my normal never returned. Most of our days are not that horrible. Most of the things we get upset about are not worth ranting about. Yet, we all do this. We allow small things to build into bigger issues than they are. They steal our serenity and suck our joy- because we allow them to. I know the warning signs in myself. When I back myself into a corner of overwhelming commitments there comes a moment when I crack. If I am overtired. If I am hungry. If all of these are combined, I can fly into a rant about something as simple as buying the wrong tissues. Occasionally we need to treat ourselves with the same care as we would treat someone we love. If I am overtired, I need rest. If I am hungry, I need to be nourished. Most importantly I need to know my limits of what I can handle in my life and keep commitments within reasonable and doable limits. When the days of unchangeable tragedy hit, allow yourself to let go. These days are worthy of ranting, crying, and screaming. But when you catch yourself flying into anger over small events pull yourself back. Compare what is happening now to those tragic days in your past. Compare what is happening to the reality of the whole picture of your life. Look at your day. Is what you are upset about the worst thing that happened in your day? Is it that bad? Ask yourself this question, “Is this the worst thing that happened in my day,” and then evaluate if it is a catastrophe or if your mind is giving it more importance than it deserves. Come to a point of realizing - if that’s the worst thing that happened to me today, I’d say it was a pretty good day! You may be embarrassed that you allowed it to control you in a bad way – especially when you know the struggles you have lived through in the past and the struggles others are living through now. Concentrate on what is good about your day and not the little problems that are not important. You may just laugh at yourself for being upset about such a small issue. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Remember this, if that’s the worst thing that happened to you today, I’d say it was a pretty good day!” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. This is the way the conversation went... “Who orders the pizza?” “Well, she calls and orders it.” “No, I mean who decides what kind of pizza to order?” “We always have sausage.” “Does she like sausage?” “Sure, I guess.” “But you are not sure. Maybe she is conceding to you. Maybe she is resenting it. Maybe she hates sausage pizza.” He pondered this the rest of the afternoon. That evening during dinner, my husband asked me an unusual question. “What kind of pizza do you like?” He had never asked me before. I had to think about it. It took me a while to answer. I had picked sausage off the pizza for so long I didn’t remember what kind of pizza I really did like. I began questioning myself. If I could order any kind of pizza, what would I choose for ME? I don’t think this is an uncommon scenario. Many times it is easier to concede and let another person have what they want. We do it out of love for them – we want them to be happy. We do it out of avoidance- we don’t want to argue. We do it because it really doesn’t matter that much to us. We do it because we have done it for so long it becomes a habit. – A dangerous habit. On the other side, it is easy not to notice that someone is always giving in to our needs. That their needs are not being met. That resentment may be building under the facade of agreement. Maybe it is just pizza. Maybe it is pizza, ice cream, what movie to go to, where to have dinner, where to vacation, which car to buy... This could go on and on and the layering of conceding to another’s wants and desires can create an issue much, much larger than a pizza. What is the “pizza” in your life - in your relationships? Are there issues you need to talk about? When we begin paying attention to this kind of give and take.... or give and give situation, it becomes obvious that there are solutions. Simple solutions. My husband and I now order two pizzas. One sausage for him. One chicken and pineapple for me. Yes, I LOVE chicken and pineapple on my pizza. Preferably with extra sauce and extra cheese. The solution was so easy. Now we both get what we want. There is no conceding. There is no resentment. There is compromise. There is cooperation. There is respect for both of our needs and wants. And there are always leftovers for lunch the next day. Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Pay attention to “give and take” vs “give and give” situations in life. Don’t be afraid to order your own pizza!” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. I was terrified. My toes curled around the end of the diving board. I closed my eyes so I couldn’t see the deep water below. The board was small, but I felt as if I was on a 30-foot-high Olympic diving platform. My swimming instructor held a long pole with a net on the end blocking my escape route off the board. It was clear. I had no choice but to jump. I froze in fear. This is the memory of my childhood swimming lessons. I hated them. On Friday nights I would sneak into the linen closet to find a feather pillow to sleep on. I knew my allergic reaction to the feathers would create a stuffy nose and cold-like symptoms by morning. When I woke up, I would plead with my mom that I couldn’t attend the weekly Saturday swimming lesson because obviously I had a cold and felt terrible. I love water. I have enjoyed a life of water skiing and boating. I love streams, rivers, lakes, and oceans. The thought of soaking in a warm bath brings joy to my heart. I swim with my children and challenge my grandchildren to beat me in a race across a pool. I have experienced the energy of a pod of spinner dolphins’ race around me in the ocean. The sound of water features fills my home with peace. Water calms me and cocoons me in contentment… and yes, I love to swim. I didn’t learn to swim in swimming lessons. I learned to swim by putting a towel around my shoulders and riding my bicycle to the community pool and jumping in. I learned to swim by jumping off the side of a boat so that I could slide my feet into skis and skim across a lake filled with water that looked like glass. I love swimming, but my fear almost kept me from ever doing it. That swimming instructor believed that standing me on a diving board and waving a pole at me would somehow force my learning. What it did was force me into a space of fear. A space that blocked me from doing what I wanted to do. It didn’t work for me and in fact, almost separated me from one of my lifelong pleasures. The lesson I learned from this is to find another way. If something doesn’t feel right to you- if something causes more pain than pleasure- find another way. Be creative. It is our nature to move away from pain and move towards pleasure. That feather pillow helped me move away from a swimming instructor's painful teaching technique that didn’t fit with my way of learning. I wanted to be in the water. I wanted to swim. Learning by fear was not my way. My way was through the fun and enjoyment of water. I found another way. Has this happened in your life? Has fear kept you from trying, learning, or doing something you know you would love? Can you find another way to work around the fear? Don’t allow fear to win. Find your own way. Jump over the fear and into the water. Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Don’t allow fear to keep you from doing what you love to do. Find another way.” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. It is the time of year when the excitement of a new school season is approaching. New clothes and shoes are purchased. Backpacks are filled with supplies. Butterflies tickle young tummies as children wonder about which friends will be in their classroom and who their teacher will be. It has been many, MANY, years since I have been in school, but I do remember all of this. School memories can fill your heart with nostalgia and wistful thoughts of experiences, successes, and a few failures. Do you remember in school when your assignments were returned to you after the teacher made corrections with a red pen? Those red checkmarks, circles, and comments cut right to your heart as if a neon sign was flashing “FAILURE!” Could this be where we learned the concept of judging? We have been conditioned to point out what is unacceptable, wrong, or incomplete. We all have a mental red pen that constantly searches and rates everything within our focus. We judge others on their clothes, income, status, and even the behavior of their children. We judge restaurants by how good the food is, how clean the floor is and how immediate the service is. We judge the weather by the temperature, wind speed, and humidity. And the mental red pen does double duty when we judge ourselves. The number on the scale is too high; there are too many gray hairs; accomplishments are not grand enough; on and on and on. What if we stepped back from the mental red pen? Stop the checkmarks, circles, and comments and adopt the phrase, “Isn’t that interesting?” The next time you see a girl with blue hair, tattoos, and piercings or want to thrash yourself for the two pounds you gained on vacation, step back, take a breath, and say, “Isn’t that interesting?” This is not saying you condone everything you see and every action you or others make. It is just the calm acknowledgment of observation. Not good. Not bad. Not negative. Not hateful. The phrase, “Isn’t that interesting?” may become a buffer between you and confrontation. It may become a kinder frame for self-talk instead of the negative chatter we are used to hearing. It may become a new perspective into non-judgment of others. The mental red pen can become the means for feedback and not failure. Can you live one day without judging yourself or others? Try it. You will notice just how often you do engage that mental red pen of acceptability or failure. After you complete one day, try for two, then three. You may just step back from this exercise and say, “Isn’t that interesting?” ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie’s Life Lesson: "Put down your mental red pen. Instead of judging yourself and others say, “Isn’t that interesting.” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. I snuck away with my Grandson, Dylan, for an afternoon of feeding the ducks in the park, picnicking, and a little shopping. After the ducks were fed and our tummies were full we moved on to shopping. My shopping cart spilled over with the arms and legs of a three-year-old. As I maneuvered through the aisle, I asked him, “What should we buy for you today? Maybe a shirt, a book, a……” My list was interrupted when he said, “I have everything I want.” My cart came to a stop as I looked at his sweet face. I couldn't hide my smile at his remarkable comment. “You have everything you want?” He may have been three, but he knew from the expression on my face that he must have given the million-dollar answer. He flashed his killer smile and said, “Yeah, I do! I have EVERYTHING I want! ” I proceeded to tell him how lucky he was that he was so happy and had everything he wants. He smiled bigger, sat up taller, and was very proud that yes, he must be lucky! I have to say it stunned me. What little person (or big person for that matter) can say they have everything they want? I was still pondering this as we paid for his new football. My idea – not his. Later, we stopped by my house to feed my dog, Yogee. Yogee was much more interested in dancing around the floor with Dylan than eating. After about the third time I told Yogee to go eat her food Dylan looked at me and said, "Maybe she just isn't hungry." Again, I stopped to breathe in what he just said. I sat down and watched as Yogee’s tiny feet continued the happy dance as she circled around him. As every inch of her body wriggled and smiled, I realized – she, too, in this moment of time had everything she wanted. We took Yogee to the back yard and this time it was Dylan’s turn to do the happy dance. He ran to my garden box. He circled it, hands clapping and sang, "Oh, this garden is BEAUTIFUL!!!" That was it! Three strikes to my heart! Lessons learned! At 3 years old, he could see the beauty in a garden and understood that "he" wasn't hungry for anything. -- He had everything he wants! This tiny boy had just demonstrated to me the simplicity of life. That as long as we are loved we do have everything we want. That sometimes we don’t hunger for anything - we just need to dance. And if we look we can find beauty in our own back yard. I learned that right now, in this moment, I do have everything I want! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie’s Life Lesson: "When we are surrounded by love we don’t hunger for anything -- we have everything we want." YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. What questions do you have that you wish you had the answers to? What questions do you have that will forever be unanswered? Are there some you hope to have answered in the future? What questions do you NOT want to know the answers to? Are you afraid to know the truth? Are they best left alone? I have all these scenarios. The ones that I may never learn the answers to are tangled with regret of never asking them when I had the opportunity. I will never know how my grandmother felt when her baby was stillborn or her grown son was taken in a truck accident. I will never be able to ask my dad what it felt like to win his high school track meets or if he got down on one knee when he proposed to my mom. When these questions began flooding my mind my grandparents and dad had already passed. In her last years, my mom’s dementia kept her from answering or she would answer with a creatively imagined story that was far from the truth. I regret not asking when the answers were crisp and available. So many questions will remain forever unanswered. The ones I don’t want the answers to are tucked in a place I don’t visit often. I don’t want to know the exact day I will leave this Earth. I don’t want to know when my loved ones will leave. And I certainly don’t want or need to know how the departures will occur. My biggest list may be the questions I hope to have answered in the future. Why are we here? What is our purpose? Why is there pain and suffering? Why do loved ones die young? Why isn’t happiness universally and equally experienced? Why are all the best-tasting foods bad for us and filled with calories? Why are we given such deep connections with dogs, but only allowed to have them for such a short time? Why do mosquitoes bite and cause such irritation? Why does time go so fast? Why do some people have luck and others seem to tumble in a circle of misfortune? Will peace ever be the natural order? Will the world ever be a community of mutual contentment? I had this writing almost finished when I shared with my daughter and son-in-law what I was writing about. My daughter left the room, returning with a book they had just purchased for me titled, “My Mother’s Life- Mom I Want to Know Everything About You.” It is filled with 200 questions and the space to write the answer. I plan to answer every one of them. When they purchased the book, they had no idea I was writing on this topic. This is the serendipitous magic of life. We can hope that there will come a time and space where all answers are given. But for now, ask the questions. And, if you are the one holding the answers share your truth with others who want or need to know. Don't be responsible for leaving a trail of unanswered questions. Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Ask the questions when you have the opportunity. Don’t be responsible for leaving a trail of unanswered questions." YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. So much has happened in our world in the last couple of years. Currently, we are struggling with the stories of devastation and loss due to illness, fires, tornados, hurricanes, drought, buildings collapsing, and destructive choices that humans make that hurt others. I do not have the words or understanding of why these things occur. Because of my own past experiences, I do have empathy for the grief and sadness these tragedies induce. It is easy to become so overwhelmed by the news reports and the shock of all this sadness that we miss the beauty life holds. I try to find the good in my day. I look for things I can be grateful for. I search for moments. Moments of joy. Moments of happiness. Moments of gratitude. These golden glimpses of love are, at times, easy to miss. What was your golden moment of the day? That moment when just for an instant life is quiet and the spectacular happens. Can you think of one? Magnificent Moments occur all the time -- right in front of us. They happen when we least expect it in soft miniature ways and grand glorious ways. They happen as bold aggressive attention grabbers and as mystical whispers. Watch for the best moment of your day. That moment when grace brushes by you. That moment when just for an instant life is quiet and YOUR spectacular happens. That is your Magnificent Moment of the day! It may be the unexpected bonus at work; the call from a friend you haven’t heard from in months; or the crisp perfume of morning as you water your garden in the early hours of dawn. It may be the breath of a baby as they lay sleeping on your shoulder; the excitement of your dog’s greeting when you walk in the door; or the sun as it ripples diamonds across the ocean. You see, Magnificent Moments are everywhere and given to everyone. When we are children we live in the time and space of Magnificent Moments where everything seems magical. As we age we are blinded by commitments and responsibilities. We hurry through time and space tripping and stumbling right over the magic. Begin watching for your Magnificent Moment of the day. Catch that one moment when magic moves you to a place of still; a place of awe; a place of wonder. When spectacular happens stop to breathe it in. Savor it and at the end of the day remember how delicious it tasted. We must all be mindful of the sadness and devastation in life. We will all have our turn when it touches us in deep and personal ways. We must all help others when we can. At the same time, nurture yourself by searching for the magnificence of life. When you are on the lookout you will begin to notice that you are surrounded by golden moments. The challenge will become choosing the one that is the most magnificent! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Be aware of and grateful for Magnificent Moments.” YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. There is a poem by *Mary Oliver that begins, "You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on." Forgiveness is a big word and grows to the status of huge when it is prefaced with the word, self. Forgiving myself is easier to whisper than to accomplish. I say whisper because I would not be so bold as to shout to the world, I FORGIVE ME! What confidence that would require to be so egoistic as to forgive ourselves! However, this is the most important kind of forgiveness. Self-forgiveness is a demanding process. We must learn to step carefully on the stones of compassion and acceptance while shame, guilt, regret, and judgment swirl around us. The stones are sharp and jagged as we maneuver our way, growing stronger through the struggle; learning a little here and a little there as we come closer to the green field of forgiveness that waits for us. We don’t have to be proud of what we have done – and we have all done “it.” The “it” always relates to hurting others or ourselves. Then we put ourselves in a continual critic mode of how bad we are and deserving of punishment. We chastise ourselves with ruthless determination holding ourselves to a higher standard than we do others. We replay a grander drama in our minds than the reality of “it”, believing that what we did was catastrophic. We create a self-imposed illusion of what others think of us. We construct ideas about ourselves from this illusion. The perceived assessment of others about our actions creates the vulnerability of outside judgment. At times our true fear is not our offense, but that someone will find out that we are living in shame. Self-forgiveness is not easy. It is not healed instantly or permanently with the wave of a wand. However, we deserve to treat ourselves with the same compassion we would someone we love. Each time you slip into the murky darkness of shame and guilt you are withholding love from yourself. Pull yourself back. Make amends to those who deserve it. Then move forward. Stop holding yourself as a hostage to the past. Believe that external opinions are out of our control, none of our business, and should hold no influence on our own self-acceptance. Choose to love YOU. See yourself through your own unconditionally loving eyes. Remember these words from Mary Oliver… "You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on." Pennie’s Life Lesson: “When you surrender to shame and guilt you are withholding love from yourself.” *Poem quote From Wild Geese by Mary Oliver YOUR TURN...
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below. And please feel free to email me at: PennieHunt@gmail.com. Thank you! ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ All Rights Reserved Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt. Feel free to forward and share this post. Please keep the entire message intact, including contact, logo, and copyright information. |
AuthorThere is a certain magic about where I live both physically and spiritually – on the crossroads of Spirit and Brave. Archives
April 2024
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