It was just a $3 journal.
I divided the pages into quarters marked by post-it notes. I wanted my year of writing to fit into one tidy book. A book of love.
After writing a brief introduction of what the book was, I began the first entry.
January 1- Today I love you because…….
The next day I picked up the special book and wrote
January 2nd- Today I love you because…
Then January 3rd; the 4th; and so it continued. The book became a friend that I looked forward to holding. A personal documentation of my love for him.
March 31st and I removed the first post-it note. The days paraded forward and my words filled the lines. Some days a sentence. Some days 2 pages. And I watched him. I watched what he did. How he moved. How he smelled. How he talked. I began delighting in finding new ways I loved him.
June 30th, Today I love you because….. and another marker removed.
September 30th and the last post-it note was peeled away. My enthusiasm grew. I was really doing it! I could see the end in sight. I could visualize his face when I handed him this gift and feel what it would mean to him.
For a year I wrote. December 31, 2014 was a mix of excitement to be done and a feeling of loss for not having tomorrow to pen why I loved him.
“Well, here it is – the end of a year of writing why I love you. What seemed like a challenge at first, became a joy that I am sad to see end.
I began this project to show you how much I love and adore you…as a gift to YOU. What I didn’t expect was that it turned out to be a gift to me too! I found this journal stacked in my office – purchased years ago and tucked away with other journals I buy and save for just the right time. I had no idea a $3 purchase would become so important. As the title says, ‘All Things Grow With Love,’ filling this daily in my own writing and my own words has made my love for you grow!
The gift intended for you became a gift of love to me. Every day as I watched you, searching for the moments, the reasons, the actions that make me love you, opened my heart to join yours in ways I never expected. The reasons became simple and complicated, old reasons and discovered reasons, logical and crazy fun reasons!
I learned that the way you brush my cheek makes me feel cherished. I learned that a big tough 6’5” man that can be brought to his knees by a tiny furball of a dog is more sensitive than anyone I have ever known. I learned that you surprise me every day with your wisdom, logic and humor. I learned that when you hold my hand you give me strength and power. I learned that you show me love in flowers and rings, but also in cleaning the kitchen and loving our grand babies. I learned that on one day- yes, there was one day, when I was challenged to find a loving thought due to frustration, anger or disappointment – I can’t even remember why – but even that one day I found a reason to write why I love you. I learned that no matter what happens, where we are or circumstance we find ourselves that “Us Together” will find a way to work through it. I learned that I’m not perfect and you’re not perfect, but the perfection of love creates a space for patience, understanding and acceptance. I learned that your quirks can make me laugh and your tenderness can bring me to tears. I learned that the little boy inside of you still lives with his insecurities, his fears, his joys and his sorrows and at times his tantrums, but this little boy needs love and shares love. I learned that I love you for more reasons than a one year journal can hold. I realized after this year that every moment you give me reasons to love you more and I only hope I can reach that level of success by touching your heart the way you touch mine.
Yes, what began as a gift to you ended as a gift to me. With every moment, day, week and month that I watched you I fell in love with you over and over again. As the title says, “All Things Grow With Love,” --my love for you has grown.
I closed the book. My daily companion would now be placed in the hands of the man I love. I wrapped it in white tissue paper and carefully tied the glittery gold bow around it.
A bit confused by the unexpected gift, he opened the cover and read the introduction. Flipping pages he read through January before he looked up.
No words were needed.
I knew what it meant to him.
I knew what it meant to me.
The gift that in his words, had made him feel more loved than anything else in his life, now sits on his night stand. Every night before he goes to sleep, he reads the entry for that day and he is given a daily reminder of why I love him. He reads it out loud to me and I remember how I felt when I wrote it.
It was just a $3 journal that became my friend for a year.
It was just a $3 journal that became a lifetime treasure.
Yes, All Things DO Grow With Love!
Pennie's Life Lesson: "Don't wait to tell someone how you love them. Tell them every day!"
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