Are You in A Rut – Let’s Find Joy in the Familiar by Pennie Hunt

Are you bored with your life? Bored with your home, your job, your partner, your car, your - fill in the blank? Do things that you used to love and adore seem mundane, uninteresting, and unfulfilling?

Hmmm, maybe you need a change or maybe you need to think about this differently. Have you heard of the Law of Familiarity? This Gestalt principle suggests that we group things of similar nature together. How does this relate to being bored? Well, you have a home, job, partner, car, etc. You circle these together in a big group and call that your life.

​You get up every day in your home, kiss your partner, get in your car to leave for your job, spend 8-10 there, then get back in your car, return to your home, kiss your partner goodnight and it starts again the next day. It is your life. It is all very familiar.

Familiarity leads to comfort. Comfort leads to complacency and complacency can lead to boredom.

Now step back for a minute.
Remember when you met your partner? The butterflies in your stomach, the dates, the romance, the anticipation of your future together?

Remember when you received your job offer? You were so excited to put those years of schooling to work. Excited to have your own office. Excited to put on that suit every morning and go to your job.

Remember when you purchased your new car? That new car smell. The power of pride you felt when you drove it to show your family and friends.

Remember buying your home? It was perfect! Remember when you and your partner were given the keys and unlocked the door for the first time? Walking into home ownership was a feeling like none other!

And now…
The butterflies have long ago flown away. The dates and romance are memories and the future you hoped for has become a routine. The schedule of jobs and the kid’s school and activities form a familiar pattern – day after day.

The job has become years of deadlines, expectations, evaluations, and responsibilities. The obligations of work have taken over the space that was once filled with romance and dates with your partner. The clocking of time has stretched from 40 hours to a very familiar 50 or 60 hours a week.

You slide into that same car every morning. The seat is positioned in the perfect way that fits your back and legs. The radio stations are set where you like them. It is comfortable. But the new smell is gone.

When you come home at night and walk into your home, you automatically hang up your coat, take your shoes off, and head to your favorite chair. You turn the television on without really watching what is on the screen. You exhale, close your eyes, and rest for a few minutes.

Later, you kiss your partner goodnight, roll over on your side, go to sleep, and it starts again the next day. It is your life. It is all very familiar. It is comfortable. And it becomes a little boring. Why? Because familiarity leads to comfort. Comfort leads to complacency and complacency can lead to boredom.

So how do you change this?  The first step is to become aware of the situation. I believe after reading this you may have gained some awareness. Next, realize that when your life becomes so comfortable you will sink into complacency. You begin taking everything you have for granted. When you take things for granted you stop being grateful.

To regain a feeling of gratitude, step back into that space of remembering how much you wanted what you have now. How much you wanted the future you have now with your partner. How much you wanted the house, the car, and the job. Be grateful for all of it. Until you are grateful for what you have now, you will never have more.

Maybe you do need to change something. For example, maybe your job isn’t fulfilling your desire to advance, so exploring new opportunities could be a good thing. But remember, just because you have grouped everything that is familiar in your life into one package, that doesn’t mean everything needs to change. Not everything is boring. Comfort and familiarity can be wonderful things – never lose gratitude for what you have.  
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                                                  Pennie’s Life Lesson:
                                 Be grateful for everything in your life.
     Until you are grateful for what you have now, you will never have more.
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YOUR TURN...        
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