LET ME LIVE UNTIL I DIE
LET ME LIVE UNTIL I DIE
The taxi ride was uncomfortable. Heat pushed on my chest. From the driver’s window the dry wind blew in my face with relentless force. The driver, looking at me in his rear view mirror, asked me why I was in town and what I do for a living.
I quickly gave him my elevator speech. Struggling to send my words through the hot wind I ended with,
"I teach people how to Love Their Life-
NO MATTER WHAT!"
As I delivered the words to him, the smell of smoke from the last passenger filled my nose, a crack in the vinyl seat pushed through my jeans and I realized the situation tested my own mantra.
I wasn't loving my life right now!
He became extremely interested and told me how his aging mom was very unhappy.
Then he hit me with the question that turned the heat of the day into a quiet background of minor distraction.
"Can YOU teach my mom how to
live until she dies?"
Could I teach myself that?
What would it take to REALLY live every day I have?
How could I age into the person I hope to be at 80, 85, 90 and beyond?
How could "I" live ... really live until I die?
I created a wish list... a request....a prayer...
LET ME LIVE UNTIL I DIE
Please let me age with grace and primp with glory. Let me move with ease, bend to my toes and reach for the sky. Let me wear shiny lipstick and curl my hair. Let my nails be manicured and my eyes shine. Let me wear colorful dresses that swirl when I walk and red high heels that click as I step.
Please let me be hold a fearless spirit and see adventure as rejuvenating. Let me be the one who wants to skydive at 80 and ride a Harley at 90. Let me feel the wind of possibility twirl around me never allowing the words, "I can't" to cross my determination.
Please let me giggle in girlish delight and blush when I flirt. Let me dance with boys at 90 and dance alone in the kitchen. Let me drop tears from happiness and lift spirits with contagious laughter. Let me be spontaneous with kind encouragement for others.
Please let me use the lessons of my childhood. Let me swing in the wind and slide every slide. Let me remember that please and thank you are words of kindness. Let me forgive those who have hurt, harmed or rejected me as easily as I forgive the waitress for my lukewarm coffee or the person who pushes in front of me in line -- when I move too slowly. Let me be grateful for the hands that hold mine and the gifts I am given. Let me be reminded to share my toys in the sandbox and share love with my family, friends and the world.
Please let my mind remember the memories. The people who touched me, the experiences I had, the love I gave and the love I was given. Embed in my mind these visions as colorful oil painted masterpieces that never fade. Let my mind not be so cluttered with details of despair that it fogs the joys of my years. Allow clarity of every amazing moment I've experienced so that I re-feel them intensely and cherish them deeply.
Please let me breathe every moment. See every sunrise. Hear every song. Dance every dance. Be kissed by every snowflake and stomp in every rain puddle. Let me joy in the joyous and sing with the song birds. Let me hold tiny hands and hug every heart. Let me marvel in every moment of magnificence, no matter how simple and no matter how grand. Let me run the race to the end, laugh until the credits roll, and love until my heart is stretched and pushing through my chest.
Please let me press deeper into peace with every wrinkle and spiral closer to my soul with every year. Let me be patient in the process of living and accepting of the unimaginable purity of love that waits on the other side. Let me see the un-seeable as it surrounds me. Let me joyfully anticipate the unknown ahead as the known I believe it will be. Let me live with sweet peacefulness in my spirit and my soul.
Please, oh please, let me live until I die.
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Cherish every moment.
Live, REALLY live until you die.”
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My life is on hold, I live every day same as the next. My plan step 1 will ensue on May 22, 2016. I want to be whole. I want to be happy! It only takes the small things. I want to be full of joy!! But I am somewhere between heart ache and moving on. I'll be ok.,,, time heals
10/20/2015 12:28:01 pm
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There is a certain magic about where I live both physically and spiritually – on the crossroads of Spirit and Brave.
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