Change. Do you love it? Do you hate it?
I believe there are two types of change.
The first kind you initiate yourself.

I love to rearrange furniture and paint my walls new colors every few years. I become restless when I have lived in the same house for too long. I love the excitement of changing environments. I initiate these changes.

Some people live in the same home for 50 years and are uncomfortable if their favorite chair is moved to the other side of the room. They don’t want or like change.

At times we initiate big changes in our lives. Like a butterfly must break away from a tightly woven cocoon it created, at times we must break away and change a life circumstance that is of our own making and move to a new situation. This kind of career, relationship or personal change can be painful and hard work. Once you have changed from the feeling of being bound in a tight cocoon to an open lighter space, you will see how necessary the change was.   

Some people stay in the same job, relationship or living conditions for a lifetime. They are not happy or living up to their potential, but they are frightened of change. They will not initiate change because the unknown is uncomfortable. They will stay in a cocooned space even though they know it is stifling, unhealthy or dangerous because they are too afraid of the uncertainty that comes with change.

The second type of change is the kind that is forced into your life.

A house fire can force a relocation. Company downsizing can force a job loss. A partner may leave your relationship which initiates change for them, but forces change on you. An accident or diagnosis can force a change in health that limits physical abilities. The shocking phone call that brings devastating news of the loss of a loved one, forces an instant change to your world.

No one likes the forced change. No one expects it. No one greets it with open arms.
One thing that is certain about life is the impermanence of it. Everything that begins has an ending. A joyful event does not last forever. The most painful times will pass. Every experience ultimately vanishes from our current reality and becomes a memory.

Whether you love change or hate change, I believe the happiest, healthiest people are the ones that can accept and adapt to change. We will all enjoy happy times. We will all eventually see gray hair and wrinkles in the mirror. We will all say goodbye to loved ones. Change is the natural order of life. There is always light after darkness and darkness after light. This is the ebb and flow of living.

We will all be the initiators of change. We will all have change thrust upon us like a dark downpour of a sudden thunderstorm. We must learn to expect change. We must learn to adapt to the storms as they come and accept the sunshine when we can.
Pennie’s Life Lesson:  The happiest, healthiest people are the ones that can accept and adapt to change.  

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
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                                                Thank you!  ​
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                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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I’m a natural smiler.
 I smile all the time. 
Some people don’t. 

At 6’5” my husband’s size is intimidating. His natural serious expression adds to this intimidating appearance and can unintentionally make him appear angry, annoyed or uninterested. Recently, when I was encouraging him to SMILE, he responded with,
       “I am smiling on the inside. No one ever taught me how to smile on the outside.”

As babies, we are taught to walk by repeatedly being stood in front of open arms and encouraged to move our feet in clumsy toddler fashion until we move across the room. If we don’t succeed, we feel and are reinforced that it “feels better” to walk than to fall. 

Were you taught to smile in the same way? Were you taught how to raise the corners of your mouth to form one smile after another like putting one foot in front of the other to walk?

We aren’t taught that even the slightest lift of the corners of our mouths lessens the creases in our foreheads, removes the heaviness on our face, and allows our eyes to sparkle. 

We aren’t taught that a smile is a gift we give ourselves and the easiest gift to give to others. It is almost guaranteed that if you give one you will receive one in return. 
We aren’t taught that smiles have the power to change someone’s day, to lift a heart and to share love in a spontaneous way.

We aren’t taught that a pleasant resting face with the hint of a smile creates a welcoming persona when others see you.

We aren’t taught that a full-out smile when you meet people makes them feel important and ‘seen.”

We aren’t taught that a smile opens doors, opens opportunities and opens hearts.”
We aren’t taught that it “feels better” to smile.

I am giving you the SMILE CHALLENGE. For one week practice smiling like you do any other health routine like exercise, brushing your teeth or sleeping. Three times a day stand in front of a mirror and lift the corners of your mouth. At first, you may have to use your two index fingers to push those corners up, but I promise you they WILL move!

Try variations of how you smile. A pleasant grin. A happy beam. A full-out show-all-your-teeth smile. Then throughout the day let yourself smile. Smile at strangers as you pass them. Smile at the sunshine. Smile to and for yourself when you are alone. 
It just Feels Better to smile! 

Pennie’s Life Lesson: A smile opens doors, opens opportunities and opens hearts.​

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
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                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
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                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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When was the first time you felt like you belonged somewhere? Does the memory push you all the way back to your childhood? Your family? Elementary school?
When was the last time you felt like you didn’t belong? Was it recent? Were you embarrassed? Sad? Lonely? Afraid?

Are you part of a group, a team, a school, a club, a crew, a tribe, a family, a religion, a generation or a community? Of course you are. We are all affiliated in some way to a collection of others with a common interest or bond. Humans have a need for inclusion and connection. We fear and avoid isolation. So we join. We conform. We wear the uniform. We know the handshake, the secret knock on the door and the private password.
 
We are taught to mirror the actions and mannerisms of another person so they accept us as a reflection of themselves. We want acceptance and approval. We want to fit in. It is why as a teenager you may have tasted your first beer when you were at a party with friends. You probably hated it but kept sipping it until the taste was tolerable. You felt like you belonged. You felt like you were part of the cool kids. 
 
We mimic the actions of others because we don’t feel worthy to be accepted and included unless we do. We adapt and accept the expectations that the group has for us to be a member. 

Some of this is necessary. In kindergarten we learned how to stand in line, raise our hand, wait our turn and share in order to function in a space of civility and kindness. As we grew, we learned the basics of polite and compassionate living to be accepted as a member of our human society. 
 
For many people the need to belong is an instinct - a requirement for human survival. It can push us to act in ways that feel uncomfortable or are out of character. When we bend and mold ourselves to be such a contorted version of who we are that we don’t recognize our own reflection in the mirror, it becomes a problem. 

What if we could be ourselves? Our crazy, goofy, wild authentic self? 
What if we looked at each other not with our eyes, but with our hearts? Can you drop the expectation you hold for yourself and others and be open to the exploration of who YOU are… of who THEY are? 
 
Stand in your own light and learn to accept yourself. Find the people who will see YOU and love YOU. You may lose some people from your life who only liked you for who you were pretending to be. But when you step into your light and let yourself free to be who you really are, you will attract the people who should be standing with you. You will attract the people that love and adore the real you. You won’t have to work so hard to fit in. You will finally feel like you belong in a way you never have before.  
 
Pennie’s Life Lesson: When you allow yourself to be the authentic person you really are, you will attract the people you are meant to be with.

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
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                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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​My grandson drew a picture with a caption that read,
 “Peace Feels Like Sitting in a Warm Chair”
At six years old, he understands his Place of Peace. It is a place where he feels safe, loved, centered and warm. His place of peace is in the safety of a chair with the sun warming his heart and looking into the magical wonders of the ocean.

At a time when the news is filled with the opposite of Peace, our children – and all of us -- need the security of knowing what Peace feels like. We need to know what Peace sounds like. We need to know what Peace looks like. We all need to know where our place of Peace is.

When I saw my grandson’s drawing, it reminded me of my meditation chair. It is growing old and tattered and with the wisdom of age. It has become softer, safer and stronger.  It has held me for years of long hours of meditations, journaling and prayers.  The spirit of these practices layer into every aging wrinkle of the chair’s fabric.  I feel a sacred sense of love and kindness every morning as I sink into its safe arms… settling into my Place of Peace.

What does Peace feel like to you? Where do you feel safe, loved, centered and warm? How often do you visit this sacred space to relax your heart and center your soul? If nothing comes to your mind, it is time to find your sacred space. It is time to find your place of Peace.

Find a place to nestle into like a baby bird nestles into a feather-lined nest. It may be a space in your home or backyard. It may be your favorite coffee shop. It may be a park or library. It may be the top of a mountain after a long hike or floating down a river in a kayak. Or it may be a beach chair with the sun on your face as you look into the wonders of the ocean. You may be one of the lucky ones who has honed the ability to close your eyes and shut out the outside noise to find your place of Peace within - anytime and anyplace.

Everyone has a different idea of Peace. It doesn’t matter where your place of Peace is. What matters is that you have one and you visit it often. It is in this quiet reflective space that you rejuvenate your ability to live in the moment you are given. To relax into the humanness you were meant to experience.  To tune into the inner calmness without the distraction of the world outside of us.

For me, I agree with the wisdom of a six-year-old, - Peace makes me feel loved, centered and warm.  Peace Feels Like Sitting in a Warm Chair.

Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Find your Place of Peace. Visit it often.” 

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
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                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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Goals. We hear about them all the time. Goals at school. Goals at work. Goals for the new year.  Goals for our finances, our love life and our status. Goals, goals, goals!

This is not a lecture on how to write a goal and stick to it. I want you to think about the goal that matters the most – your Soul Goal.  

You may already be neck-deep in your life goals. You are probably already measuring them, tracking them and think you have everything under control. Yet, are you experiencing a little gnawing inside? Is there a tiny whisper nibbling at your heart?  Has it been there for years, but you have hushed it?

That whisper is your Soul Goal. The good news is this is one goal you don’t have to write down, track or measure. You just need to listen to your heart because it is already there.

I believe the soul is the script of all we have been and all we will be. It has drama, action, comedy, heartbreak and love coded into this personal documentary. Yes, there is an intended outcome to the story. I believe the ending to your script is to successfully learn how to love yourself and others. The Soul Goal is our personal method of how we accomplish that. 

Have you always had a desire to paint, work with animals or heal? 
If we are here to learn how to love ourselves and others and your inner desire is to paint, then you learn to love yourself by painting. By painting you create art that is a gift you can share with others. In doing so you touch their hearts. You love others by creating your art.

If your inner desire is to heal, you may become a doctor, nurse, counselor or Reiki Master. You love yourself by following your inner voice and by doing this you heal and love others. You touch their hearts. You love others by healing. 
Do you see how this works? Your Soul Goal is the technique by which you reach the outcome of loving yourself and others. 

Listen to your whisper. Pay attention to the gnawing. If it is unclear what your Soul Goal is – pay attention to when you feel the most alive, happy and content. This is the criteria for your Soul Goal. This doesn’t have to be difficult. 

I am a writer and a speaker. While working through other careers in my life, the whisper and the gnawing was always there. I would attempt to incorporate snippets of my Soul Goal into my work. I would speak about my work topics and I would write heart-filled stories and give them as gifts. I knew when I was doing this I felt the most alive, happy and content.

My Soul Goal is simple. It is one line: To share my life lessons through speaking and writing.  In the process, I love myself by doing what makes me feel the most alive. I love others by reaching out my heart to touch theirs.   
  
I’m not suggesting you give up all of your other goals. School, work, family and life goals matter. I’m not suggesting you quit your job to become a starving artist.
What I am suggesting is that you listen to your heart as it whispers your Soul Goal. I am suggesting you find a way to incorporate this whisper into your life.

You don’t have to create ideas that you format into action steps and turn these into strategies and objectives. None of this is necessary. You can tiptoe into accomplishing your Soul Goal.  Take a painting class one night a week. Volunteer at an animal rescue center or a nursing home.  Whatever your whisper is calling you to do, find a place and begin.

Remember, your Soul Goal makes you feel alive, happy and content. It should be fun! It should bring you joy! It just takes loving yourself enough to do what your soul is asking you to do.

Pennie's Life Lesson: When you fulfill your Soul Goal you feel alive, happy and content.

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
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                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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Years ago when my husband and I were dating I learned a powerful lesson. He would occasionally say something like,
“I need a couple of days.”

What? I immediately took this personally and thought something was wrong. What did I do? What did I say? He must be angry at me. I would call him and stop by his house to see if he was okay, after all I must have said or done something to upset him. He would assure me I hadn’t and that it didn’t have anything to do with me or “us.”

I soon realized he was right. It didn’t have anything to do with me. It didn’t have anything to do with us. He was not angry. He was not upset. We just have different ways of recharging. He needs downtime. He needs a quiet respite to rest, relax and regenerate. He needs to do this alone.

For me, when I need recharging being alone makes it worse. I feed on the energy of being with people. Talking, laughing and companionship regenerates me, so of course when he would tell me he needed time to himself I felt pushed away. I thought there must be a problem. I took it personally.

How many times in life do we take things personally and the reality is that it has nothing to do with us? Whenever a stressful situation occurs many of us default immediately to the negative. We blame ourselves.

Let’s look at it differently. Let go of the immediate assumption and realize it isn’t always about us…it could always be something else that causes someone to be cranky, in a hurry or snap at us. It can always be another reason that someone needs time alone. It isn’t always about us.

Here is a trick to help with this self-inflicted internalization of blame and stress. Use this with your family, spouse, children and coworkers. Q-tip it! Yes, Q-tip it! Quit Taking It Personally!

As a reminder, take a couple of Q-Tips and tape them to your computer, your bathroom mirror, or your car visor. Look at them often and when something happens in life that sets off your internal blame game, remember to Q-Tip It!

The lesson I learned from my now husband all those years ago has saved me from many hours of needless worry. It isn’t always about me. And guess what? Now we recharge using what works for both of us. We recharge together, laughing, talking and in the quiet space of each other’s companionship.
We practice of the art of Q-Tipping It.  
​
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
                       “When the stress of life sets off your internal blame game, Q-Tip It! 
                                                           Quit Taking It Personally!”

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
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                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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I bought one ticket.
I bought the large popcorn and drink combo.
I sat in the last row. Middle seat.
I had never done this before.
 
There is something about seeing movies in a theater. The big-screen mesmerizes me. The sound swallows me. The popcorn tastes like it could be the last gourmet meal of my life – to me it’s that good. I love going to a movie theater, but I had never in my life gone alone.

There was a movie I wanted to see. The timing wasn’t right. No one wanted to see it with me, so I thought I would have to wait until it was out as a rental.

The movie chased around in my thoughts. It was about someone who had lost a child like I have. Of course, that is what drew me to it. The common thread. The curiosity. I wondered if the movie would portray my thoughts and feelings. I wondered if I would learn something I didn’t already know about grief. It followed me around pulling my heart along, not allowing me to push it away. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to see the movie.

Driving an hour to the shopping area, my whole body smiled. The entire day was mine. A day of “me” time. After a little shopping and lunch at my favorite place, the movie flashed in my mind.  I quickly looked on my phone. It was playing at a budget theater nearby and I had just enough time to make it there. But…I had never done this before -- gone to a movie alone. Is that weird? Is it weird that I am kind of afraid to do this? Is it strange that this movie has such a grasp on me, constantly taking space in my thoughts? My fear played ping-pong with the movie. 
The movie won. 

The back row wasn’t bad. It felt safe. No one could see me – or the giant bucket of popcorn I balanced on my lap. At 1:00 in the afternoon on a weekday there were 6 other people there to share my theater. None of them came alone. Except me.

I shut off my phone. Two hours went quickly. The movie was amazing. I cried. I hurt. At times I wanted to shout at the screen. There were moments I wanted to pray. I understood why I needed to see the movie. The message was for me.

I sat in my seat until the last credit rolled, the lights were bright and the workers came in to clean up any abandoned popcorn buckets.

A few things became very clear.

It was clear to me that I would not have received the message the movie brought to me if I hadn’t listened to my heart pushing me to see it.

It was clear to me that although going to a movie alone may seem like a silly fear to some, it was real to me. Walking into that theater was empowering. It was clear I had missed opportunities in my life when I allowed fear to win.

It was clear to me that I did need to see the movie. I needed to see it alone. I needed to be able to cry alone. I needed to absorb the meaning of the movie’s message - alone.

Life is magical how it manipulates us, bringing us messages we need to hear, putting us in places we need to be, pushing us to do things that we are afraid to do. All of it is done with the intent of giving us clarity.   

And yes, I ate the entire bucket of popcorn.

Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Listen when life is pulling, pushing and prodding you to do something that stirs fear. Until you walk into it, you will never fully gain understanding, clarity and strength.”

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
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                                                         All Rights Reserved
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                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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Have you heard of the Stanford marshmallow experiment? It was a study on delayed versus instant gratification. In this study, children were offered a choice between one marshmallow, that they could eat as an immediate reward, or if they waited a short period of time without eating the marshmallow they would be given a second one. The children who patiently held on to the first one enjoyed the delayed gratification of eating two marshmallows. It was an interesting observation of human behavior.

The speed of our world puts our lives on a mind-swirling treadmill. We have been trained to move fast, accomplish now and not sit still or wait for anything. We want and expect instant gratification.

We run from one event to the next, one occasion to the next and one obligation to the next.

Our kids are entrenched in going to school, participating in sports and other activities. Parents are busy keeping them occupied and maintaining their children’s schedules.

Add that to the obligations of our careers, taking care of our home and families and the expectation of volunteering. Then there are the extra things in life like trying to have fun or take care of ourselves. This spins the hamster wheel of speed and commitment faster.

This speeding through life has taught us to expect everything instantly. We send a text and then stare at our phones. We expect a response in two seconds. When we send an email if it hasn’t been answered in an hour, we become impatient. What’s wrong? Aren’t others just sitting at their computer waiting to answer us?

We are so busy that we rush through planning holidays, weddings and other events without enjoying the process. In the stress of hurried preparation, we miss the excitement and thrill of anticipation.

Then we have this thing called FOMO - fear of missing out - because we want to be everywhere doing everything with everyone all at the same time.

This speed and fear have taught us to want and expect instant gratification. It has taught us to give instant gratification. When we receive a text we stop everything to answer because that’s the way the world works. We want our food fast, our bank deposits to be instant, our communication immediate and our lives seamless.
Do you remember two short years ago when we all sheltered in place? Life seemed to slow to a standstill. At the time I believed the universe was teaching us lessons. Forcing us to slow down. Forcing us to be grateful for the moment we were in. Forcing us to learn patience and enjoy the process instead of jumping from one outcome to the next. It was an unusually quiet time.

Today I drove through traffic dodging cars controlled by intense drivers rushing to their destinations. I heard texts chime on my phone and scanned the list of emails that were delivered within the last hour. I looked at my calendar filled with appointments and obligations. The speed has returned. The fear of missing out has returned. The rush to the finish line has returned.

I will admit that as a child if I was given a marshmallow, I would have probably eaten it and not waited for the second one. Maybe I still would. But as I write this today, I believe we need to revisit the lessons we didn’t learn well enough during the quiet time.

We need to recognize that a leisurely phone call is better than a hasty text. We need to understand that very few things are so important that they should be allowed to interrupt the natural flow of our lives.

We need to appreciate that an event is over in a blink and the preparation and anticipation can be more powerful and more exciting than the event itself.
We need to slow down. The need for instant gratification has taken away the sweet luxury of enjoying life. We need to put as much joy and love into relishing the process as we do whatever the event or the experience is – even if it is just eating a marshmallow.
​
Pennies Life Lesson:
​Lessons can be forgotten quickly. Allow what you learn to seep into the very being of who you are and how you live. If you don’t, you will be taught the lesson again.

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

Who am I when I am not who I used to be?
Who am I when my world has totally changed and everything I knew is gone?
Who am I when I don’t know who I am anymore?
 
It was more than a decade ago. I was sitting in my home office looking out the window and my phone began chiming with an incoming call. It was one of my son’s friends. I was excited to hear his voice and thankful that he had kept in touch with me since my son’s passing. He asked how I was doing and then he told me he would be graduating from college soon and was working on his resume. He asked if he could use me as a reference. My heart smiled as I thanked him for thinking of me and yes, yes of course he could. Then he asked the question,
               “What should I put down as your title?” 
I pushed away from my desk and forced my chair to lean back to catch the breath that had just been sucked from my chest.  What is my title? Who am I?

I had worked another year after my son passed, but it never felt right. I felt disconnected. I had been through the most horrific time of my life and knew I needed to use my experiences to help others. It had been a few months since I had resigned from my executive position and I was not yet sure how my plan to be a speaker and writer would fall into place. I had given myself a year to figure out what my new work would look like. I knew what my title used to be. I knew who I used to be. But sitting in that moment, I was not sure who I was now.

I quietly paused on the phone while my mind held on to the bar of a trapeze that swung between the old me and the new me on the other side- afraid I might fall if I let go. Finally, I answered by telling him to state that I was the former Executive Director of the organization that I led for many years. When we said goodbye, he was satisfied with that. I wasn’t.

I knew I wanted to write and speak. I knew I was going to help people. I believed that all I had been through in my life was training for this new work. I didn’t know how it would play out, but I knew it would. For a long time I lived in the comfortable stability of what used to be. I used to be an Executive Director. Anything else didn’t feel real. 

Then I began visualizing my new life, my new work and my new title. I practiced saying, I am a speaker and a writer. It took me a while to let go of that trapeze bar, swing freely in the untethered gap and begin creating who I was going to be on the other side.

After many speaking events and a lot of writing, I felt confident enough to own the title of Speaker/Writer. I was at an event when someone asked me what I did for work when I realized it was more than speaking and writing. I answered with, “I help people Love Their Life- NO MATTER WHAT!”

“Tell me more,” they said. 
​This opened a long conversation about how I do this. It allowed me to explain my speaking, books, blog, newspaper columns and my personal reason for doing the work I do. It was at that moment that I realized exactly who I am. I had created my mission, my work and my new life.

At some point we all find ourselves at a tipping point in life. When careers change, when death, divorce or retirement happens you may start asking the same questions that I did.
Who am I when I am not who I used to be? Who am I when my world has totally changed and everything I knew is gone? Who am I when I don’t know who I am anymore?

There are new answers. There can be a new you. Let go of the past and spend some time in the open space to allow opportunities and creativity to grow. You can change what you do, how you do it and who you are at any point in your life. You may not create the circumstance that leads to the questions, but you can create the answers.

Pennie’s Life Lesson: You can change who you are, what you do and how you do it.
                                          Be brave enough to begin again.

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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     "I'll try to make myself as small as possible,"  she said as she pulled her arms close to her body and settled into the middle seat between me and the man sleeping by the window.
 
When I fly, I have learned to take the aisle seat when I can. It allows me to exit quickly when the plane lands and to have one side free, giving the perception of more space. At times I enjoy the window seat, but I really hate the dreaded middle seat. That is the space that sandwiches you in with no room to lean, stretch, or relax. A flight in the middle seat can be agony.
 
When my new seatmate made her comment, I laughed and responded with some fluffy chit-chat about how the middle seat is a tough one to sit in.
 
The plane took off.
I put my earphones on.
Pretzels were delivered. 
 
The comment floated in my head… I'll try to make myself as small as possible.
 
I thought about how many times I had done that in life. How often I had made myself small to allow room for others to have the space they need, to be comfortable, to spread their wings, to shine in the spotlight even if it was at the expense of my own comfort.
 
An honorable thing to do, right?
 
Well, yes, it can be at the right moment, for the right reason. The problem is it can become a habit. If you constantly pull back into the shadow of others you are not allowing your soul to shine. The beauty of YOU is hidden. The gifts you were brought here to share will never be known. I believe we are here to stretch our souls. To learn. To teach. To love. 

We cannot do this with our arms pulled in forcing our bodies to contort into a small version of our real selves. We cannot do this if we sit in silence or speak in whispers without shouting our message to the world. We cannot do this if we huddle into smallness without standing tall, reaching our arms up and claiming the space and spotlight we deserve.
 
We are all worthy of a space large enough to hold us. Large enough to hold our ideas, our desires, our hopes, our needs, our ambition and our successes. Large enough to hold our message, our love and our light. Everyone deserves a seat on this trip through life. Don’t bind yourself into a partial version of who you really are. Don't make yourself small to make someone else seem big.
 
Stand tall. 
Put those arms up.
Speak your message.
Celebrate who and what you love.
Honor your successes by creating more.
Allow your soul to shine in the spotlight of life.
Only then will you gift the world with the real you.
The YOU that you were sent here to be.
The YOU that was sent here to be shared.
Only then will the real YOU be loved.
                              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie's Life Lesson: Don't make yourself small to make someone else seem big.
​                              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
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​The server began clearing the dishes from our table and said,
    “Would you like to order dessert or                       are you satisfied?”

This comment made me push back from the table and sit up straight. It wasn’t uncommon to be asked if you would like dessert after a restaurant meal. I’m used to hearing,
       “Would you like dessert?”
       “Did you save room for dessert?”
       “Can I tempt you with a sweet treat?”
And so many other ways I’ve been asked that question,
But…
It was the way she asked it that caused me to pause. Am I satisfied? I had to rethink my plan. Many times, when I go out for a nice dinner, I automatically order dessert. Sometimes I am completely stuffed by the time I have made my way through an appetizer, salad, the main meal….and of course, dessert is part of the ritual of dining out. Being satisfied with what I had consumed so far had never played into the mindless response of ordering dessert. I always want dessert! The way she asked the question forced me to differentiate my want from my need; my contentment from my greed; my hunger from my desire.

The truth was I was full. My hunger had been (by definition) satisfied. The way she posed the question humbled me. I had just enjoyed a lovely meal. The quality and quantity was more than many people in our world have to eat in a day. I was embarrassed to ask for more.  

This experience happened years ago, and yet, I have never forgotten that server. I have never forgotten the question. I have never forgotten the lesson.

How many times in life do we automatically want more? We want a nicer car, a bigger home, a larger paycheck. We want more attention, more friends, more love, and more happiness. When did we become so unfulfilled with where we are? Why have we learned this behavior of never being content with what we have? 

Satisfaction comes from knowing when our belly is full, our thirst is quenched, and our life needs are met. The reality is, we can only drive one car at a time. We can only occupy one home at a time. And, no matter how much money we have, we can only eat one burger at a time. Satisfaction comes from knowing when enough is enough.  
                                                   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Be satisfied with where you are right now, with what you have right now, with the breath you are taking right now. Satisfaction comes from knowing when enough is enough.”
                                       ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

We talk about love all the time. We love this thing and we love that person. Yet, how often do you really THINK about love? Most people spend more time deciding what to have for dinner than thinking about love. Shouldn’t this intense feeling of deep affection rally more than an occasional thought?

What is love?
What does it mean to love and be loved?
Who do you love and what makes you love them?
Who loves you and what makes them love YOU?
How do you show love through actions, words, expressions, and service?
Are you showing it in a way that makes that person FEEL loved?
What makes YOU feel loved?
How do you feel when you GIVE love?
 
When you begin thinking about Love and asking these questions, your ability to express love and feel love will increase. That only makes sense, right?
Take some time to study your habits of love. Study the way you love the ones closest to you and how they love you. Study how you show love to the clerk at the grocery store or the co-workers you interact with all day. Study how you treat yourself. Are you loving to yourself?

It is easy to create a habit of nonchalant loving without ever thinking about LOVE. Maybe it is time to begin nurturing the way you love. Once you have answered the questions above and studied your love habits, it is time to take action. What act of love can you do first thing in the morning? Make coffee for your spouse or put notes in your children’s backpacks. Smile at other drivers on your way to work and allow that car to move in line in front of you. Buy the people behind you coffee in the drive-through. At work compliment coworkers. Send someone a note in the mail, just to say you are thinking of them. Be joyful when you pick your children up from school. Tell your wife or husband that you missed him/her and thought of him/her during the day. Call your parents. And never, NEVER go to bed or hang up the phone without saying, I LOVE YOU!

All of those suggestions sound like acts of kindness. Loving kindness. It takes a while to create a new habit, but you can do it. February is the month of love, but it is time to THINK about love every day. As the song goes,

“What the world needs now is love, sweet love
It's the only thing that there's just too little of
What the world needs now is love, sweet love
No not just for some, but for everyone.” - Jackie DeShannon

Begin today. Tell others that you love them. Show others that you love them. Start planning LOVE into your day. Don’t forget to love yourself in the process!
                                            ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Do you ever THINK about LOVE?  Maybe it is time to begin!”
                                            ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

I send Love Notes.
Some say, “Thank You.”
Some say, “I’m Thinking of You.”
Some say, “I Am Grateful To Have Met You.”
And, some just say, “Hi.”
They all say, “I Love You.”

You see, I'm a conversationalist; A communicator.
I love to talk.
I love to write.
I love words and the way they somersault out of my mouth and into the hearts of those who receive them. I love to give pieces of myself to others by sending a gift that carries with it my heart thoughts.

Life may be too easy for us today. We simply type a note through our emails or texting and it is magically in the hands of the receiver within seconds.

I remember the magic of writing a letter to my Grandmother asking for my favorite peanut butter cookie recipe and waiting in anticipation for the postal service to deliver her response.

I remember waiting two weeks for a letter from my sister with the much-awaited pictures of my newborn nephew and then hurriedly writing her back to say, “Send more!  Send more!”
I have saved boxes full of the love notes.
I have letters my dad wrote to my mom when they were dating.
I have letters my grandmother wrote to her mom when she was pregnant with my dad. 

I have a bundle of memories tied with a ribbon from one of my best friends when we were exchanging letters weekly the year before she passed.
I have a postcard my dad wrote to me when I was four and he was away on temporary leave with the Air Force.
I have the first Mother’s Day cards my children gave me with their tiny crayon scribbles and the last note my son ever wrote to me.
I have 20 years of Valentine cards from my husband that hold personal thoughts and moments of love.
I have scraps of paper that my mom wrote notes on after a visit and hid for me to find later.
I have notes and letters from people who have read my column or heard me speak and take the time to share their lives and thoughts with me.

Today we have immediacy and instant gratification. But there is magic in holding a note created with love; Tracing the swirl of the handwriting with your finger; Seeing the smudges of the ink or noticing the faint smell of the perfume or cologne of the sender; knowing the message has traveled across the country or even across town to arrive in your hand. 

When I put pen to paper, I spill my thoughts and emotions with the intent of someone else holding them. My love and my energy travel with my words. From my hand to their hand, I want them to hold the gift of me. The gift of love.

Heart-to-heart communication cannot be generated by a machine. This is personal. 
I send Love Notes. They all say, I Love You.
                                                    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson: 
“Take the time to write a love note to someone you care about– make it personal.”
​                                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

Growing up I wanted to be a teacher. I got married right out of high school. I had babies young. 
My life moved forward, and years went by. I always wondered… what if I would have gone to college?
Would I be a teacher? What if I went back to school now, could I still be a teacher? My self-talk would push back with, “well, I can’t do that now.”

I always wanted to be a writer and publish a book. I had a busy job, a busy life and thought no one would be interested in my words and thoughts. I could visualize the cover with my name running across the bottom as the author and thought… what if I would have begun writing when I was younger. Once again that voice in my head said, “well, I can’t do that now.”

What are your 'what if's' and 'can’t do's' in life? Do you allow yourself to believe that a golden opportunity has passed, and you will never be able to accomplish it now? Do you live in a space of wondering ‘what if I would have’ and telling yourself you can’t do it now?

What if instead of living in regret for something you didn’t do or accomplish, you switch your self-talk and began daydreaming, fantasizing, and imagining what you could do? What if you tried?

When I was what many would believe to be middle-aged, I began thinking what if I could. I found information about scholarships, loans, and colleges. My self-talk became, “what if I could.” One day when my courage rose to a confident level, I went to my local community college and signed up for a class. It happened to be creative writing. One class to test my ability and self-confidence. I loved it! I could do it! And I was pretty good at it.

That one class turned into the next semester with a few classes and soon I found myself working towards a degree at the same college my two oldest children were attending. Was it easy? No. But with every step forward I became more determined, and my children were right there cheering for me as I marched across the stage and received my diploma.

I walked off the stage into a busy work life believing there were not enough hours in my day to write. My inner voice kept telling me, I can’t do that. Then I wrote my first blog and hit publish. After five years of writing, my first book was published. I didn’t know that with every weekly blog, I was taking one more step toward my dream. I didn’t know that my writings would fold together to create that book cover with my name across the bottom as the author. I didn’t know that with every word I wrote I was telling myself, ‘What if I could?’
​
Looking at my life I did become a teacher of sorts by sharing my tips and techniques through my writing. It would not have happened if I kept believing that voice in my head telling me that I can’t do that.

I ask you again, what are your ‘what if’s’ and ‘can’t do’s’ in life? I am asking you to change that to, “what if I could.” Take that first step and then the next.  I know you CAN do it!
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
             “Don’t allow your own self talk to tell you that you can’t do something.
​                                        Change it to, What if I could?”

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

I came back from my walk frustrated.
   “I forgot to wear my pedometer,
     so I’m not getting credit for my steps!”
My husband heard my grumbling and responded with,
   “It doesn’t have to be counted by a pedometer.
      Your body knows and gives you credit for it.”

He was right. Just because a little tech device wasn’t calculating my steps and chiming when I hit 10,000 didn’t mean it didn’t happen. Every step we take, every move we make, every word we speak, counts – even if no one sees us do it, hears our words, or charts our progress. It counts!
It made me think of how this relates in so many ways to our lives. How many times do you tell yourself stories like these?

• If no one sees me eat a donut, then the calories don’t count. Wrong. Your body counts them.
• If I am speeding or texting it is ok as long as there isn’t a police officer in sight. Wrong. Accidents happen when you speed or are distracted and then the police will arrive. Practice safe driving!
• I don’t have to show up for school or work today. I will just study and get my project done so it doesn’t matter if I was there. Wrong. It does matter. Other’s notice if you don’t ‘show up’ for them. ALWAYS, ALWAYS, show up!
• I don’t have to answer a phone call from my friend, I’ll catch them later. Wrong. Friendship is a two-way effort. When a friend reaches out to you, accept their hand. Hold it in good times and in bad. Cheer for their good news. Cry together when it isn’t. Respond when they call and if you haven’t heard from them in a while, reach out to them. We all need to feel cared about. It counts.
• If I think negative thoughts, it’s ok as long as I don’t say them out loud. Wrong. Thinking negative thoughts is just as damaging as saying them out loud. All that negative self-talk counts.
• I don’t have to tell someone I love them - they should know. Wrong again. Don’t ever miss an opportunity to tell someone you love them. Life is precious and brief. There will come a time when it was your last chance to tell them. Don’t miss it! It counts.
• I’m busy so I can rush by people and not take the time to acknowledge them, thank them, or be kind. Wrong! Showing kindness and gratitude makes a difference. You put out energy with every action. By projecting kindness and gratitude, you put positive energy out into the world to be felt and mirrored back to you. What you project you can expect. It all counts! 
• And yes, every time you take a walk, jog, or workout, your body and your health reflect it- even if you don’t have a device clicking away steps to prove you did it. It counts!

Pennie’s Life Lesson: Every step we take, every move we make, every word we speak counts – even if no one sees us do it, hears our words, or charts our progress. Everything we do counts!

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

​We are experiencing a cold winter with wild winds and heavy amounts of snow. It has gone past the winter wonderland stage with me and slid right into feeling like frigid isolation.

The combination of the letdown after the holidays and the cold winter weather typically opens to a kind of quiet, slow, sad time for me. January has never been my favorite month.

Except for January of 1985. That is the year I was gifted with my son, Jameson Tanner, - J.T., as he preferred. 

That January I relished the cold winter that kept me bound to my home and my baby. I remember the delicious days of holding him bundled in my arms, rocking for hours in the same chair I had rocked my other babies. I would sip hot tea and stare at his tiny face, in awe of the miracle I had been given, knowing it would be the last time I would step into the arena of motherhood.

As the wind and snow whirled outside, I hoped the moments of grace and innocence would be frozen in that rocking chair. I hoped the winter of 1985 would last forever. It didn’t.

The calendar pages turned, and Jan. 14, 2022, is J.T.’s 37 birthday - and it is the 15th January I will have celebrated without him. Since his passing, I have learned to count. In the beginning, it was the weeks since he left, then months, and years. I count holidays. I count how many of his friends have married. I count how many babies have been born and how many people have passed. I count events he has missed. The number is always followed with, “since J.T. passed.”

This cold January wind reminded me of two years ago when I was thinking of his 35th birthday. I was talking to him as I often do. I tell him about what he has missed, how I miss him, and how I need to feel his hugs and hear his voice. Over the years, I believe, I have received messages from him in magical ways. These come in the form of smoke alarms and electronics going off, finding guitar picks in odd places, license plates, and music. He was a musician, so music was large in his life. He loved the Beatles, the Eagles, punk, and hard rock. If there were drums or a guitar in it, he loved it. During the time of his passing, he was in a Bob Dylan phase, so of course, we played a Bob Dylan song at his funeral.

I talked to him as I prepared the contribution to his daughter’s college fund that I make every year in honor of his birthday. As I wrote out the check, I was missing him terribly. I told him how beautiful his daughter is and thanked him for giving us this lovely soul to remember him by. After tucking the donation letter into an envelope, I grabbed a package I needed to mail and headed to the post office. The line was long. I waited with unusual patience. It gave me time to think about him.

When it was my turn, I chatted with the clerk as she weighed the package. I put my credit card in the machine and saw the envelope in my purse. I said,
   “Oh, and this letter is all stamped and ready,” as I handed it to her.
Just then music began playing. The clerk said,   
   “Well, that is good timing, we are all done, and someone is trying to call you.”
 
I looked at her confused. That wasn’t my phone. It wasn’t the normal ring. I looked in the side pocket of my purse and my phone was not in its usual spot. Then I realized the music WAS coming from my purse. I dug deeper to the bottom where I found my phone playing a song from iTunes- Bob Dylan’s, “Don’t Think Twice, It’s All Right.”

I thanked the clerk, silenced my phone, and ran out into the winter cold to my car. I never listen to iTunes. The phone was at the bottom of my purse and spontaneously began playing just as I handed the clerk the donation letter for J.T.’s daughter. 

I guess the clerk was right. Someone was trying to call me. J.T. was sending his approval. It was one of his perfectly-timed messages. Suddenly, the winter didn’t seem so bad. Suddenly, I felt warm and surrounded by one of his glorious hugs.

This week as I celebrate his 37th birthday, I will be watching and listening for one of his messages. When it arrives, once again, I will believe.
                                     ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie's Life Lesson: If you watch and listen, messages will come. I believe.
​                                       ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

Recently it was pointed out to me that I am not 28 anymore. This message came in two ways. One from my body as I bent over during a Yoga pose and thought to myself, “Whose knees are those?”

Later, as I was questioning out loud how my knees have changed, a friend pointed out that my age number no longer begins with a 2.

When did that happen?  For that matter, how did I rush through 3, 4, and 5?  My friend’s point was, why would I expect to have 28-year-old knees when I wasn’t 28 anymore. She added that I should stop being critical and accept myself and my body for the beauty it holds, even if my number now begins with a 5…ok 6.  

Whoa! That set off some major pondering in my head. Accept myself? Accept myself?

The first thing I had to do was contemplate what my perception of me at this age and space in my life should be. What was I willing to accept? 

I will admit to being someone who over the years has had a difficult time with the perception of perfection. I have been the overachiever who wanted to be perfect.

The perfect daughter.
The perfect mom.
The perfect wife.
The perfect friend.

All my life I have held a perception of what my perfect weight should be, what I should and shouldn't eat, how much I should work out, what I should be doing for others… the list could go on and on.   

Take a minute and visualize the Perception of Perfection you hold for yourself. 

Do you have it? If you are like me it is an over-exaggerated, unattainable Perception of Perfection fueled by our own self-talk and the world we live in. The media tells us minute-by-minute how we should look, dress, and feel. We buy into this and continually believe we are not good enough. Is this realistic?
   

My pondering has brought me to a place of honesty with myself. I have eased up on my expectation of being the perfect anything. What I have come to realize is that we are who we are and that is enough and in our own way we are all perfect. Does that mean we can’t improve? No. Life is a continuum of self-improvement. The lessons we learn in the process is the reason we are in this life. It is the continual self-doubt, self-criticism, and self-shaming that sets us up for failure and unhappiness.
My new mantra is this: Pennie’s Perception of Perfection = Honesty, Health, and Happiness. I may not be the same size I was and have the stamina I had at 28, but I look and feel pretty good. I am healthy and I love my life. And guess what? My age number does start with 5… ok, 6 (dang it) and those are my knees.
Now take out your paper and pen and write the Perception of Perfection that fits you. 

Pennie's Life Lesson:
 “Our personal Perception of Perfection should be based on Honesty, Health, and Happiness.

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2022 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

Growing up I never lived close to extended family. I was fortunate if I saw my grandparents once a year. My grandmother passed when I was 25. This means I saw her about 25 times in my life, and yet she made a massive impact on me. She knew how to take small amounts of time and create memories that matter.

How many times a year do you see a loved one? Let’s use a mother or grandmother, for example. If they live far away, that number may be small. Now think about how old that person is - let’s use the age of 79. The average life expectancy in the US for a female in 2021 is 82.65 years. If you only visit them once a year, then you may only see that special person 2.5 more times.
Even if they are much younger than our estimate, we never know how much time they will be here – or how much time we will be here.

Looking at it this way, time becomes more important. Every time together becomes more important. How you use the time together becomes more important. It made me think about how I use time. How I waste time. How I allow time to slip away.
At the end of every year, we all say things like. How did that year go so fast? How can it be New Year already? Time flies!

Well, here we are. Looking right into 2022. Where did 2021 go?

Ten years ago, I gave up on New Year’s Resolutions. They never worked for me… or maybe I never worked intently on them. So, I began picking a word for my year. A word I could concentrate on to guide my year. A concept I would ponder and pay attention to for an entire year.
​For 2022 I have chosen the word, TIME.

I want to be intentional about how I use my precious hours, minutes, and days. I want to pay attention when I go down a rabbit hole on the internet and come out of it two hours later. I want to limit my scrolling time- scrolling screens of other people’s lives while taking time away from my own.

I want to pay attention to sleeping enough hours. I want to pay attention to allowing myself priority time to paint, sew, read, bake, sit in the sun, walk in the snow, enjoy a cup of coffee, and do all the things I love to do.

I want to pay attention to my relationships. Who I spend time with. Why I spend time with them. Am I spending the most time with the people most important to my heart? If not, I want to change that.

I found a definition of time that reads: time can be defined as the ongoing and continuous sequence of events that occur in succession, from the past through the present to the future. Time is used to quantify, measure, or compare the duration of events.

That is what I want to do. I want to be mindful of my past, present, and future. I want to measure the duration of my events and prioritize my time spent on them by the importance they bring to my life. I want to treat each visit with a loved one like the precious time it is, because we don’t know how many more visits we will have. I want to make even small amounts of time a memory that matters.
My word for 2022 is Time.  

Pennie’s Life Lesson: Make every moment of time a memory that matters.  

​Every year I make name card holders for the grandchildren’s Christmas table. It makes dinner special as they find their assigned seat and giggle over what is holding their name.
 
A few years ago, I had a grand idea of using snowman ball ornaments on top of three candy canes and the loop of the candy cane would hold the name card. My grandson, Riley, is always so excited about holiday decorations, so I asked him if he would like to help me make them. 
 
After a visit to Hobby Lobby in search of small candy canes, scouring the lights and decorations, and a stop for lunch, we went home to create!
 
We found the photo on the Internet of a similar idea and started unwrapping candy canes. I thought it would be awesome. Riley was skeptical.
 
It didn’t take long to realize that Elmer’s glue on candy canes creates something like peppermint slime. Who knew candy canes and glue don’t mix! My mind quickly began thinking of what I had in the house to improvise and save this disaster. What will look like a snowman? What will not melt with glue? What will make me look a little less like a loser in the eyes of my grandson?

Well, when all else fails, bring out the marshmallows! Big, GIANT marshmallows! I thought it would be awesome! Riley, who by now had eaten enough candy canes to have rosy cheeks and watery eyes from a little too much peppermint, was still skeptical. 
 
By the end of the afternoon, we had used toothpicks and glue to attach the bodies, stood them on a base of red and green felt, given them ribbon scarves, and added buttons. It wasn’t until I broke a toothpick in half and pushed arms in the first little puffy man that I saw Riley smile. 
“Now, that is CUTE!” he said.
We had snowmen! 
​
Once again, I had received a lesson in acceptance. My idea of the perfect card holder failed. It took a little flexibility to improvise a new concept. They were not perfect. But by the time Christmas dinner was ready the marshmallows were hard as stone. The snowmen stood strong with the name tags sitting in front of their fat bellies. My grandchildren laughed and compared who had the funniest snowman.
 
Since then, I have made gnomes out of old makeup containers, painted pinecones, and this year will be small shiny red and green bells that will be shaken and rang to the point of irritation to all the adults. What I have learned is to be flexible. Flexible with my expectations. Flexible with my creativity. And Flexible with the outcome. Peppermint slime and marshmallow snowmen taught me a huge lesson. Card holders, like the entire holiday, don’t have to be perfect. If there is laughter, if there is joy, and if there is love, there is success. 
 Pennie's Life Lesson:
                         Holidays don’t have to be perfect. 
                 Flexibility in the process may turn out to be the best part of all. ​

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

"Relax and allow the process of life to occur." 

When I said that to a friend of mine, I felt the intensity of her response ripple up her back forcing her to stretch upright and lean forward.

"Relax and allow life to occur? What about work, my kids, my husband? We have basketball games on the weekends, ballet practice after school, I volunteer on Wednesday night, my husband is out of town for work this week, and my in-laws arrive for a visit this Sunday. I have gifts to buy and wrap, cookies to bake, and my tree isn’t even decorated. Relax? The next thing you are going to tell me is to sit with my legs crossed and just be. Are you crazy?"

I could see she was desperately trying to control the pace and rhythm of her busy life. By doing this the scope of her world was overwhelming her.

I know the symptoms of overwhelm because I see them often and I have felt them many times. The symptoms are typically similar - the tired, drawn look with heavy under-eye circles from skimping on sleep; the extra 10, ok, 15 lbs that are always trying to be lost, yet increase due to eating on the run; the endless checking of emails, texts, and phone calls; the continual list-making of tasks and responsibilities required to get through the day and the week; and the quick defensiveness of why all of it is necessary and important. This causes life to be crazy and out of control. 

Sitting with legs crossed is not necessarily the answer, although the “just being” part is close.

This continual out-of-breath pace that life forces us to run is counter to what we are meant to do. When we are out of breath, we cannot allow life to occur, let alone relax to a place of enjoyment.

Breathing is important, but remember the only breath that is significant is this one; the one we are taking right now. The last one is over and the next one has yet to fill our lungs. And it won't unless we successfully inhale and exhale the current one. You see, you can't take more than one breath at a time and the only important one is the one you are breathing right now.

If you use this concept in life you will learn to slow down and experience one event at a time. View each event and experience as a breath. Just as you will begin to focus on the breath you are taking, you will also begin to concentrate on the event you are experiencing. . . not the ones on your list for tomorrow or the responsibilities you have to others. It is this breath right now, this experience right now that is important.

Life will unfold. Maybe not in the vision of perfection that you hope, but it doesn’t have to be. You may be surprised to find that you CAN relax and allow life to occur.
 
Pennie's Life Lesson:
                      "When you focus on the moment you are in, 
                               you can relax and allow life to occur."​

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

Today I donated my old Christmas tree.  For three years I have wanted a new tree. I had become annoyed with the amount of glitter and white artificial snow that fell from it. I would find it all over the house well past Valentine’s Day. I had become frustrated that I could never fit it back into the tree box the way it came out. The days that I put it up or took it down became days of dread that left me looking and feeling like a glitter-covered wrestler that had lost the match. For three years when the stores clearanced all holiday items after Christmas, I looked for a new tree. One that was easy to assemble. One without glitter or snow. One that I felt was beautiful enough to take over the role of center-of-attention for my holiday season. For three years I failed.
​
This year I didn’t wait for a clearance sale. This year I began searching the ads right after Halloween. I visited stores. I took photos of trees I thought I would like. I studied assembly options, light lumens, and branch counts.  Then I found her. The perfect 7’ 6”, 800 light, 4,335 branched tipped queen of my future holidays.
She sits in my living room all aglow displaying shiny blue ornaments and family memories. The decorations sparkle enough that I do not miss the glittered snow branches of my old tree. I am in love with her.  

I saw photos of her that first year where she reigned like a queen surrounded by beautiful packages and shiny ribbon. I saw photos of her with new babies and toddlers laying under her in awe of the magic held in sparkly lights and holiday secrets.  

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​

You planned for a year. You sent out invitations, ordered a cake and said “Yes” to the dress. The day comes and it is spectacular.  It is the fairy tale wedding of the year. Even the honeymoon was perfect. And then, you came home to a new life with a partner and Now What? Now, things like laundry, negotiating finances, and toothpaste in the sink become reality and you are not adapting well.
You didn’t plan past the wedding cake. 

You brought home one or two, maybe more, sweet-smelling bundles from the hospital. You bathed them, fed them, and nurtured them through talking, taking their first step and all the steps after that right until they walked across the stage- cap and gown on, tassel dangling and your pride beaming. You help them pack their car, you make sandwiches for the road, and tuck cash in their hand. The door closes on your child as they drive off to a new life leaving you in an empty nest and Now What? Your purpose has just driven away and what will you do now?
You didn’t plan past parenting. 

The turkey is bought, or jellybean baskets are filled, or the tree is up, and presents are wrapped- whichever holiday it is, you have prepared for the fun, food, and family. The house is filled with laughter and joy. The day after comes and Now What? The house is quiet and empty. Your heart sinks from sudden loneliness. Your festive holiday adrenaline is drained and has puddled on the floor.
You didn’t plan past the holiday. 

The dreaded school reunion is 6 months away, so you work out, diet, lose those 30 pounds, and fit into that little black dress. The day after comes and Now What?  You sleep in because working out is overrated, a cheeseburger and fries sound good for lunch- after all you haven’t had them in 6 months and so it goes. Soon the little black dress is tucked in the back of your closet with the other too small clothes.
You didn’t plan past the reunion. 

It happened.  Rehab. A little too much drinking, pills, gambling, or whatever your addictive vice is. You can do the 30-60-90 days. You do the counseling, the group sharing, the journaling, and inner work. The day comes when you finish. Your mind is clear, your body cleansed, and the world looks bright and possible again. And Now What? You return to the old life, the old friends, the old habits, and you are pulled further and further away from the protection of rehab and fall into the familiar arms of your vice.  
You didn’t plan past 30-60-90 days.

This is how we do life. We look at the gold ring. We reach for it. We get it. And then what? We don’t plan the next step. We don’t plan the next goal or the maintenance of our accomplishment. Without planning past we will suffer from the slow slide back into the darkness of depression, or relapse into old habits and routines. Planning past should become as much a part of your process as your steps to success.
Plan past the wedding cake – visualize and talk about how your shared life will be. 
Plan past parenting. Do not curl into a tight ball of depression disappearing into your empty nest. Look at it as a new adventure, time for YOU to fill this newfound space with the experiences YOU want to pursue. 

Plan past the holiday, so that after the presents are gone, the tree is put away and leftovers are eaten you have scheduled what is next on your calendar to fill the quiet. 

Plan past the reunion. Don’t lose weight for a specific moment in time. Get in shape for yourself, your health, your longevity. You will look and feel great for every event… not just one reunion. 

Plan past a program. The 30-60-90-day programs might work for the time you are there, but you need a life program. One that doesn’t end when you walk out of a facility. One that is engrained in your belief system 100%.... then it becomes YOUR program. Your way of life. Your success! 

Be proactive. Look at your life in long-term successes.  Short-term goals are great steppingstones, but to be successful in life you must not look at a goal as the finale. Always be prepared and have a vision for what comes next. Only then will you walk a life-path of achievement knowing that each successful step you take creates a trail of confidence behind you and a road of determination ahead of you. 

Pennie’s Life Lesson: “Don’t stop when you reach a goal. Plan past the achievement. Have a vision for what comes next.”  

YOUR TURN...        
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
 PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                                                Thank you!  ​
                                      ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                                         All Rights Reserved
                                          Copyright © 2013-2021 Pennie Hunt
                             This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​