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  • UPCOMING EVENTS

FIREWALKER

10/11/2019

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Picture
My name is Pennie Hunt and I am a Firewalker. 

Yes, you heard right... a Firewalker.

Here's the thing.... Everyone is a Firewalker!  We all walk through fire at some point in our lives.  These fires take many forms: divorce, health issues, loss of a job, or the death of someone you love. 

Not long ago I walked through a real fire.  I watched as a huge pile of wood crackled and burned until it fell into a layer of chunky red hot coals.

As I stood at the edge of this path of fire I wondered if I had the courage to walk through.
The answer was.....yes!

Walking through the fire that day, I realized how it related to the fires I have walked through in my life.  These are the lessons I learned.

~ You must take the first step. ~
  • If you stand at the edge of the fire yearning for the soft landing on the other side, you will either be pushed in or remain living in a place of fear.  You must take the first step to reach the other side.


~ You must take your time; walk slowly
     and experience the fire. ~
  • If you try to rush the process, believing that by running through you won’t feel the pain, hot coals will be kicked up lodging deeper into your skin. You WILL be burned.


~ You must feel the fire, but keep
     moving through. ~
  • If you stop in the fire standing still to simmer too long, the fire begins to feel normal to you. You will like the attention you receive for being there.   But, eventually others will lose interest in your burning and leave you standing in the heat.


~ You must walk through your fires alone. ~
  • You may have many people cheering you on from the sidelines as you walk through your fires, but ultimately you have to walk alone....it's your feet that must get dirty to reach the other side.


~ You must look up and forward as you
    walk. 
  • As you walk, if you continually look down at the fire fear will consume you causing you to live a life of victimization and bitterness.  You must look ahead. Only then will you walk through the fire successfully to live a life of love, peace and gratitude.


~ When you think you are done
    walking through the fire check for
    smoldering sparks. ~
  • Once you reach that soft landing on the other side and think all is well, you must check to ensure that you don’t have smoldering sparks.  Sometimes tiny pieces of hot coals stick between your toes and in the depths of your heart.  These hidden sparks may seem harmless, but when left unattended may flare up again and again --when you least expect it.


~ Say thank you and celebrate what was
​    good about walking through fire. ~
  • When you have walked through the fire, look back at what you accomplished. Honor the fire for the lessons it gave you----strength, courage, patience and love.   


~ You must believe you can. ~
  • Finally and most importantly, from the first step to the last, you MUST believe in yourself! 


Yes, I am Pennie Hunt and I am a Firewalker.

I believe if you follow these steps you will be a successful Firewalker too!

               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“We all walk through fires in life.  Believe you have the courage to walk through them and be grateful for the lessons they teach you.”    
                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
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YOUR TURN
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to think about  how strong you are and your capacity to walk through the fires of life.
​
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​
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WILL THIS MAKE ME A BETTER PERSON?

9/28/2019

2 Comments

 
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He insisted that he should buy the toy. After all, who doesn’t need a tiny dinosaur that you put in water and within 48 hours it grows to be 600 times its original size? Who wouldn’t want that?
The tears were growing in his 7 year-old-eyes and then his mother asked the magic question.
     “Will having that toy make
                            YOU a better person?”
 
WHAT???
Who is thinking of that?
It’s the best toy in the universe.
This is life and death.
He wanted it and he wanted it now.

I prepared myself for the tears to roll, the screams to begin, and a suitable tantrum to be displayed.
But, it didn’t.
He stopped. Thought a minute. And replied,
     “No, I guess not.”
 
This isn’t a story about kids, toys or tantrums.
This is a story about life lessons.
The life lessons I have learned from my daughter for the last 39 (+ 9 months) years of her sweet soul being in my world.

I add the 9 months because out of my 4 pregnancies, she was the easiest. I felt great and understood the “glow” that people refer to when you are pregnant. It was carrying her that taught me to enjoy the process and to slow down and appreciate the miracle of growing another human inside of my body.
 
I have watched her as she maneuvered being the middle child between two boys and most of the time she kept them in line.
 
I have watched how she finished college and fearlessly moved to a new state to begin a life in this big crazy world. And when she moved back, I knew it wasn’t because she wasn’t strong enough to be there.  Maybe it was because she knew I wasn’t strong enough to be without her.
 
I cried as I watched her pick the perfect wedding dress and celebrated that she had chosen the perfect man to support her life and be her husband.
 
I have felt pride when she announced she was pregnant, felt joy when she handed me her first baby, and 3 years later felt deep concern when her petite body carried twins. She powered through the discomfort, gestational diabetes, shingles, and being confined to bed. And less than 12 hours after the twins were delivered 6 weeks early by emergency cesarean, she insisted on leaving the hospital and was in the car with me driving more than two hours to be at the children’s hospital where the babies had been transported.
For her, there was no question - the determination of her wanting to be with her premature babies, overseeing their care, outweighed the pain and risk to her own health.
​Witnessing her strength through all of this was a lesson in overcoming fear.
 
I have watched how she processed the death of her younger brother and over the years has been a strong vital part of his daughter’s life.
 
I have watched her put her babies to bed and stay up late into the night to study, achieving her master’s degree and climbing the career ladder, ignoring the silliness of a glass ceiling.
 
For 39 years I have watched my beautiful daughter celebrate joyous occasions and handle tragedy. She has modeled strength, commitment, determination, and unconditional love.
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​ 
When my daughter asked my grandson if that little toy would make him a better person, he put the toy back and chose a pair of binoculars.

They hung around his neck for days as he used them to see the world in a new way.
 
It was a small question, but it wasn’t a small moment. My daughter was teaching a life lesson.
She taught it to her son. 
She taught it to me.
She taught both of us to see the world in a new way.
 
My sweet daughter, having YOU has made me a better person.
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson: 
“With every decision, action, and thought, 
​                           ask yourself,  —   
         Will this make me a better person?”
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Pennie Heart to Heart
WILL THIS MAKE ME
​A BETTER ​PERSON

YOUR TURN
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to think about what actions make you a better person -- and what actions don't.
​
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information. ​
2 Comments

I Forgive Me!

9/20/2019

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​There is a poem by
Mary Oliver that begins,                

  You do not have to be good.
  You do not have to walk on your knees
      for a hundred miles through the
     desert, repenting.
  You only have to let the soft animal of
     your body love what it loves.
  Tell me about despair, yours, and I 
     will tell you mine.
  Meanwhile the world goes on.

Forgiveness is a big word and grows to the status of huge when it is prefaced with the word, self.  Forgiving myself is easier to whisper than to accomplish.  I say whisper because I would not be so bold as to shout to the world, I FORGIVE ME!  

What confidence that would require to be so egoistic as to forgive ourselves!  However, this is the most important kind of forgiveness.

Self-forgiveness is a demanding process. We must learn to step carefully on the stones of compassion and acceptance while shame, guilt, regret and judgment swirl around us. The stones are sharp and jagged as we maneuver our way, growing stronger through the struggle; learning a little here and a little there as we come closer to the green field of forgiveness that waits for us.  

We don’t have to be proud of what we have done - and we have all done “it.”  The “it” always relates to hurting others or ourselves. Then we put ourselves in continual critic mode of how bad we are and deserving of punishment.  We chastise ourselves with ruthless determination holding ourselves to a higher standard than we do others. We replay a grander drama in our minds than the reality of “it” believing that what we did was catastrophic.  

We create a self-imposed illusion of what others think of us.  We construct ideas about ourselves from this illusion.  The perceived assessment of others about our actions creates the vulnerability of outside judgment.  At times our true fear is not our offense, but that someone will find out that we are living in shame.  

Self-forgiveness is not easy.  It is not healed instantly or permanently with the wave of a wand. 

However, we deserve to treat ourselves with the same compassion we would someone we love.  Each time you slip into the murky darkness of shame and guilt you are withholding love from yourself.  

Pull yourself back.
Make amends to those who deserve it. 
Then move forward.
Stop holding yourself as a hostage to the past.
Believe that external opinions are out of our control, none of our business and should hold no influence on our own self-acceptance.

Choose to love YOU.
See yourself through your own unconditionally loving eyes.  

Remember...
          You do not have to be good.
          You do not have to walk on your knees
            for a hundred miles through the
            desert, repenting.
          You only have to let the soft animal of
            your body love what it loves.
          Tell me about despair, yours, and I
            will tell you mine.
          Meanwhile the world goes on.
             ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
Pennie's Life Lesson:
“When you surrender to shame and guilt you are withholding love from yourself.”    
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN
My intent in sharing this with you is to forgive yourself. Let go of past regrets, guilt, and shame.  Forgive others AND forgive yourself!​
​
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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THE POWER OF FORGIVENESS

9/14/2019

2 Comments

 
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It happened in Kmart.

It was one of those moments that I can never reproduce, but I will remember it forever as an opening point-- A moment that opened my heart, my understanding and my eyes to the power of forgiveness. 

      “I blame you for nothing, I    
       forgive you everything and I 
        will always love you.” 

He looked shocked, confused and stunned as he stopped to look at me.
      “What?” 
I repeated with a little more importance on always, 
      “I blame you for nothing, I
      forgive you everything and I 
        will always love you.”

This time the face of my grown child turned to a delicious mixture of relief, acceptance and love.  He dropped the bundle of socks, toiletries and food that he was holding in his arms into the shopping cart.
The hug was long, the tears honest and the meaning understood. 

This is how forgiveness works. 

I can easily forgive others for cutting in front of me in line, taking the parking spot I was clearly heading toward or for a snapping comment that I seem to be on the receiving end of.

I assume they are having a difficult day.  You never know what the bubble over their head is holding, what is going on in their life, or what hurt they carry.  

I am happy to report that I have successfully accomplished forgiveness with most people and circumstances in my life.

The disclaimer here is that I am a soul in progress.
My humanness allows for human emotions.
I have tried countless forgiveness methods, such as: 

 The Bury and Forget It Method;

The  If I Don’t Talk About It, It Didn't Happen Method; 

And the popular

 This Person Doesn't Deserve Forgiveness, So I Am Going  To Lock Them In A Box, Put Them On A Shelf To Occasionally Take Down And Kick Them Method. 

Forgiveness is a life lesson I continually attempt to perfect. 

The forgiveness challenge for me has been with those who have harpooned my heart in a penetrating way.  When I helped someone, cared for them and trusted them to hold my heart in friendship or love, only to have them rip it from my chest, pierce it and then hand it back to me.
Is the expectation that I won’t feel the scar?

Even more difficult is when a perceived injustice is done to someone I love. 
Is the expectation that I watch with no malice felt toward the offender?   

That day in the shopping isle the answer became a clear,YES. 

I came to understand that when you forgive, relief, acceptance and love become a two-way effort.  My heart no longer carried the heavy weight of anger, betrayal and disappointment.
I no longer had to continue the painful circle of picking the scab to feel it bleed and begin to heal, only to begin the picking again.

When I felt the relief in me that day, the lightening of my spirit, and the release of the burden of carrying all those negative emotions, I realized that forgiving is a gift to myself.  I emptied my heart of the dirty work of bitter resentment and opened more space for love.

When he heard my words and dropped his bundle into the shopping cart he also dropped his fear, shame and regrets and opened more space in his heart to love and be loved. 

By forgiving,  I am not condoning, excusing or pardoning another’s actions.  I am not saying that in every circumstance I will forget or remove all awareness of the offense in an effort to reconcile a relationship.  Some relationships are best left as a lesson in our past.  

I am suggesting we begin looking at things differently and open our vision to see that blaming, resenting and revenge do more harm to ourselves than to others.
We are all learning from our humanness.
We all make mistakes.
We all feel shame.
We all inflict hurt.
None of us can say we haven’t wronged another.  

 It’s time we start seeing the power of forgiveness.
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson: 
“Forgiveness is a gift that opens more space for love – in you and others.”
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to forgive. Let go of past hurts.  Forgive others AND forgive yourself!
​
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
2 Comments

SOMETIMES I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT YOU

9/8/2019

6 Comments

 
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Sometimes I don’t want to think about you.
I want you out of my mind.  
I want empty space.  
I want a white screen. 
I want a fresh canvas.  
I want a blank page. 

I don’t want to think about the day you were born.  That look in your eye telling me more joy and pain than I could ever imagine was ahead of me. 

I don’t want to think about your blonde baby hair and those killer brown eyes.

I don’t want to think about watching you ride your bouncy horse-- boots, chaps and hat on, swinging plastic guns and yelling, “Giddy up” as you flew across your imaginary world.

I don’t want to think about how many skateboards you went through, how we hung the broken ones on your bedroom wall like trophies and the surgical stitches that became your scars of honor. 

I don’t want to think about home runs, hockey goals and potential.

I don’t want to think about fishing, hiking and camping trips.

I don’t want to think about balloons, parties and 22 years of blowing out candles.

I don’t want to think about the drumming, the singing, the music that spilled from you – and the music left inside.

I don’t want to think about the jokes, the joys, the fights, the I’m sorrys and the I Love Yous.

I don’t want to think about the days of celebration and the long nights of worry. 

I don’t want to think about how your hugs felt. How your laugh sounded.

I don’t want to think about the phone call that ended the memory stream. 

I don’t want to think about how you leaving shattered my heart.  The strength it took to mold it back together and the unrepairable cracks left open where pain whistles through with every breath I take.

I don’t want to think about the tears, the regrets and the hurt. 

I don’t want to think about that oak box, 
the baskets of flowers
and your silent guitar.

I don’t want to think about everything that has happened since.

I don’t want to think about how many years I have ahead without you.

Sometimes I don’t want to think about you.  I don’t want the constant pain.  I don’t want the reminder of what I no longer have. I don’t want memories attaching to my every experience, my every move and my every breath.

I want empty space.  
I want a white screen. 
I want a fresh canvas. 
I want a blank page --to rewrite the story.
​
Sometimes I don’t want to think about you.…
     And then, I do. 

              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
     “Hold tightly to the people you love.          
           Someday you will only hold
​                     thoughts of them.”
J.T.
Jameson Tanner
​1-14-1985  - 9-13-2007
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
6 Comments

THE SPACE BETWEEN

8/30/2019

0 Comments

 
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Have you ever thought about the space between?

The space between the thought and saying it. 
The space between the idea and doing it. 
The space between the ring of a phone and saying hello.
The space between the moment of opportunity and the miss.

The space between is that sacred second of decision? That instant when you make a decision to do something - or not.

Hawaii has a phenomenon known as the Green Flash.  It is a blink-of-the-eye blaze of intense emerald green that occurs in the second that the sun sets on the horizon of the ocean.  The mystical space between the day and night. 

The Green Flash is just that - a flash that lasts a second, or maybe two.  It isn't visible with every sunset and because of the quickness of its presence it is easy to miss.

We are given "the space between"  many times in our days and our lives.  When missed, we feel regret, remorse and sorrow.  We fear we will never have the chance again to say the words, implement the idea, pick up the phone or grasp the opportunity. 

The space between often times is not something we can predict or create again.  We don't always get a do over, but we can hone our sense of understanding of the Green Flashes in our lives.
 Never allow closed eyes to stop you from seeing them and never allow fear to keep you from taking action.

Use the space between.
Use your sacred second to take a breath and...
Put your thoughts into words and say them out loud.
Take your idea from your mind to reality.
Answer the call.
Recognize the opportunity and jump when you see the opening.

Don't blink in that split second when the sun sets.  Open your eyes and be ready for your Green Flash.
           ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
Pennie's Life Lesson: 
 "Never allow closed eyes to stop you from seeing opportunities and never allow fear to keep you from taking action."
            ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...                 
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to watch for your sacred seconds of decision - don't miss a Green Flash in your life! 
***Since we all learn from each other, please share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.
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OH FERN

8/25/2019

2 Comments

 
​My Mom passed away on August 10th. I have been spending time with my family while we planned her funeral and took care of arrangements. I stayed away from my work and all social media during this time as I cocooned in my place of safety. (See tip of the week below.)

I appreciate your kind thoughts and condolences, as well as your patience as I process this deep loss.

To honor my Mom, I am sharing with you a writing I wrote in 2013 when The Fernster was 82. She was 88 years, 2 months, and 19 days old when she passed. Looking at all the photographs from her life my amazement, respect and love for my Mom has grown to an even higher level than when I wrote this piece.

You all knew the Fernster as I brought her into your lives through my writings, sharing pictures, and videos of her. 
Please join me in celebrating the woman who brought me into this world and taught me so much about life!

Blessings,
     Pennie
Picture
​OH FERN

​I can still hear my Dad say,
“Oh, Fern,”
as she began one of her stories.

He called her Fernie Annie. 
Her nickname is The Fernster. 
Elsie Fern Tutewiler Hunt - yes, that is her name. To me she is Mom and yet, she is more than any of those names.   

Growing up I remember her as the family organizer, the child wrangler, the disciplinarian, and the choreographer of our life. 

She was a working Mom when most were home watching soap operas and creating meals from the Betty Crocker Cook Book.  She worked hard and expected the same from others.  

Thinking about the Fernster, I began to wonder who she was before me, before the years of motherhood and responsibility wrapped around her.
Picture
I looked at some pictures of her in younger days.  I saw the impish smile of a child and imagined her laugh.  I saw the hair of a young woman flow around her physical presence - self-assured, happy and carefree.  
​
I realized that stepping back from the Mom I've always loved I could look deeper to see a whole person. Years before her title of Mom, there was a woman filled with spirit, determination and dreams, eager to experience this world.    
The Fernster is almost 82 now and slowing down a bit.  Her eyesight a little less focused, her hearing and memory a little muffled, yet her spirit and spunk remain intact.   
Picture
Now I see the whole person wrapped with memories of a life lived, people loved and experiences had.  And yet, the spark of that young woman still burns with spirit, determination and enthusiasm for life ahead.   

The Fernster.
Fernie Annie.
Elsie Fern Tutewiler Hunt. 
Yes, to me she is Mom and yet, she is more than any of those names.  I value her not only as Mom, but as a whole person she is. 
I love her so -- the person she was before me and the person she is today with me.

Oh Fern, keep telling those stories. 
                     ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie's Life Lesson:
                       “Step back to see the ones you   
                             love  as a whole person!”
                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Picture
The Fernster loved to take selfies with me. This was our last one - taken July 13, 2019.
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
2 Comments

THE WISDOM OF TREES

8/10/2019

2 Comments

 
Picture
​We all have memories that include a tree. 
You may think of a childhood tree swing, climbing a tree, picking apples, or sitting under your favorite shade tree.

Have you ever thought of the life wisdom we can gain from trees?  

Trees push their roots deep into the ground, curving and curling to create a foundation of strength. Many times, intertwining with the trees next to them to form a force of commitment as if standing like a family with arms banned together for strength.

Bending with the wind, the tree demonstrates contentment and adaptability during sunshine and storms.  With the breaking of branches, they teach stamina and survival, and after every environmental pruning they return stronger and rejuvenated with life. 

Trees hold a sense of community and serving others.  Opening their space to birds, squirrels, bees and even children to build homes in their branches, the tree proudly holds firm and strong to bear the weight of sharing a place of safety with others.

At times when disease or parasites attack, the tree’s bark may buckle and boil to form a knot or malformation in the trunk.  The tree doesn’t hide or disguise this disfigurement.  Instead the visible scar is acknowledgment that it has suffered yet endured the wounds of time.  

Trees adapt to the changing seasons, turning colors and shedding leaves for the winter to create space for the new birth of spring.

Bearing fruits and nuts, it nurtures and feeds others and when a tree falls its final gift is of kindling to warm the chill of those in front of a fire or as the framework of a home.  

From trees we learn:

     *  To band with our families and build our            roots and foundations strong. 

      *  To bend with adaptability to change.

      *  To hold community and helping others             as our service.

      *  To acknowledge our scars and suffering
          as badges of life and learning.

     *  To share our gifts.  

     *   To enjoy and accept the birthing, the                shedding and the circle of life.

Yes, wisdom of life can be heard in the rustling branches of a tree. The next time you are under a shade tree or look up to see a bird happily singing as it perches on a branch, think of the lessons we learn from trees.
                    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie's Life Lesson:
        “When you are looking for the
            wisdom of life, look to a tree.”
                  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 ​YOUR TURN...
 My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to study a tree.  Connect with it.  Understand the wisdom it shares with you. 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
2 Comments

ONE PERSON CAN MAKE  A DIFFERENCE

8/3/2019

1 Comment

 
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I remember that day in 2012 walking into my first National Speakers Association (NSA) Conference with excitement and enthusiasm. That was soon crushed by fear and uncertainty. 

I had left my position as Executive Director of a healthcare organization just months before.  In that capacity, I went to conferences, spoke at them, and navigated the world of healthcare.  I knew people.  People knew me.  I knew healthcare acronyms and the lingo.  It was comfortable and fun.  I was at home in that world.

But this was different.  I felt alone.  I felt out of place and lost in a world of people I didn’t know.  I didn’t speak their language. After the second day I was ready to go home and by the end of the conference I had decided I would never attend another one.  After all, I didn’t fit in this speaker world. I left feeling unnoticed and invisible. I wasn’t one of the ‘cool kids.’ I wasn’t even close.

It took months of soul searching and self-talk to return the next year.  I did and I haven’t missed a year since.  The second year I told myself that I would just go to listen to the great speakers – more for entertainment than anything.  One year I went with the intention to learn, learn, learn.  One year I went with the goal of not thinking about me or my speaking, but to help others in any way I could.  Last year I went too soon after my car accident and spent most of the time in my hotel room in pain, crying, and just wanting to be home.

This year, my 8th conference, I finally felt at home.  Over the years, I have met people that have become one special friend at a time.  This year I knew people.  People knew me.  I have connected online with people that I was excited to spend time with.  I was included by others and I invited people to spend time with me.

Even with all of that, there was one person, one moment, that made this year different for me. Her name is Naomi Rhode.  She has been in the speaking business a long time.  She has accomplished every measure of success in NSA and won every award. She is a level above the ‘cool kids.’  

Right before the opening ceremony, she happened to be with me and said hello, introduced herself and asked what I do.  I told her the short version of my story. I told her I teach people- How to Love Your life- NO MATTER WHAT.  That I teach how to live in love and gratitude.  How I speak to honor my son who I lost in 2007.   I told her it was heart work for me.

Naomi didn’t just listen, she locked eyes with me.  In a crowd of over 1000 people, she listened with her heart.  And then, she said something I will never forget.  She held my hand, looked me in the eye and told me how what I do is so important.  That there are so many ‘lost’ people in the world and they need me.  They need my message. And to never stop. 

At that moment in a crowded ballroom I felt welcomed.  I felt important.  And for the first time, I felt like I was home.

I’ve been speaking since the time I could stand and entertain my family (yes, I am the baby), and I’ve been a speaker in some capacity at every job I have held in my life.  Now, speaking on my own, I believe I do know a thing or two about speaking.  When I met people this year who had that fear look that I had my first time I sat with them. I talked to them. I told them how I felt the first time and that it gets better. 

At this year's conference I listened with my heart. I shared from my heart.  I cried from laugher and from heart moments. And, I learned a lot!
And, I learned a lot!

But, the most important thing I learned is that one brief conversation when someone really listens and really cares can change you. 

Maybe I will never be in the cool crowd.  Maybe I will never stand on the main stage of this conference speaking about how to increase sales, improve your ROI, or the latest and greatest technology- because that is not my message. But what I know for sure is- Relationships are important. Connecting is important. What I do is important.  There are many ‘lost’ people in the world and they need me.  They need my message. And, no Naomi, I will never stop. 
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson: “It isn’t money, acceptance or accolades that constitutes doing important work.  It is how you help others and make a difference in their lives.” 
​              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to make a difference - one person at a time!    Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
     ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​



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​QUIET WITHIN

7/26/2019

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Settling into seat 8F, I pulled my jacket off and tucked it into my carry-on bag. I would not be needing that in Phoenix.

I looked forward to the sunshine and warmth ahead after the negative-number temperatures of the last week.  In went the jacket.  Out came my reading glasses, iPad, magazine, headphones.  Headphones!  Where are my headphones? 

I always travel with them.  They are the noise canceling kind that block the roar of the plane engines, the voices of the passengers visiting, the cries of babies in the back, and the intercom messages from the cockpit.  I block these so that I can enjoy the time to read, sleep or meditate in the headphone secluded space of rain falling, ocean waves, or the tweeting of birds; whichever seems to be my pleasure of the moment.

With a sigh, I felt the aggression of the engines lift the plane into the sky as 9F, (who obviously had a hearing issue), began to explain to 9E, in his best not-so-quiet voice, why he was selling his home in New Jersey to move to Phoenix.

I had a hearing issue too - for this hour and forty five minute flight my headphones were happily next to my meditation chair at home.  Hummppfff!

After reading an article or two in a magazine I laid it to the side, closed my eyes and began breathing. The deep in and out rhythm my body sensed as the call to meditate.  To enjoy calm.  To go within to the space of quiet where the outer world drops away.  Where the deepest thoughts of my soul mix with the messages from the energy both in and out of my body.

​I guard this time of meditation as a mother guards her child.  This is more than just a happy place.  This is my sacred time.  My daily ritual of flowing into calm serenity to a place which is more than one foot here and one foot there, but more like all there.  All-in, as they say in Poker, to an out of this body and fully in peace space.

The engines' roar became a soothing hum which muffled the voice of 9F.  The ping of the pilot's bell seemed to whisper the message of safety that floated by my thoughts of awareness without stopping to take residency in my space of peace.  I was there!  Not here, not asleep, but there.

Almost an hour passed when my breathing returned to the shallow breath of normality.  My eyes fluttered open as my senses returned to the awareness of my surroundings. The engines below my seat continued to spin as the mechanical dropping of the landing gear engaged. 

        "And in Phoenix the homes are a STEAL
          right now, so from what I clear on my
         Jersey home, I'll  pay cash for the new
         one." 

Seat 9F had not stopped his elaboration of his relocation.

I realized that I had successfully enjoyed the flight.  I had enjoyed a time of meditation and for a brief period  blocked the outside forces of noise, chaos and distractions.  I smiled at the reminder that calm serenity can be accomplished any place.  Any time.    The noise of the outside doesn't have to detract from this.  The outer world we cannot control.  It is the Quiet Within that we search for.   It is the Quiet Within we can find... Even without headphones.
               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Pennie's Life Lesson:
"Searching for tranquility does not require a vacuum of silence. Real peace is found within - even during the distraction of life."
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to understand that no matter what chaos  you are feeling in your life YOU have the power to feel peace within.     Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
     ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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DON'T CONNECT THE DOTS

7/23/2019

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​DON’T CONNECT THE DOTS! 

Have you ever experienced a meltdown…the kind where you find yourself in a messy puddle on the floor?

 I have a concept called, "Pennie’s DOT Theory", that states:

 “Any event that happens to us, around us, or concerns us is just one tiny DOT in the grand adventure of life. If we over-think one DOT it becomes magnified and joins with other DOTs to form a mass of stress that creates imbalance and unhappiness.”

 If we blow one DOT out of proportion it can consume us, make us irrational and ultimately we end up in that messy puddle.  The problem is we over think a little DOT allowing it to become a big DOT.
Remember this-  
         D--O--T-    
       DON’T  OVER THINK the DOT!  

It happened to me.
It began with a flu shot.
Well, the flu shot is not responsible for the entire meltdown, but it is the DOT that began the snowball rolling. For three days after the shot I felt tired, drained and far from the perky, optimistic, personality I am known for. 

My fatigue turned into a colossal cold.  Another DOT.

I stopped working out, stopped meditating, stopped eating right…DOT… DOT… DOT! 

As the days continued my snowball began rolling faster. More stressful DOTs showed up.  The imbalance grew.  I broke dishes, forgot things and my blood pressure went up.  

As the DOTs continued to connect, overwhelm sets in.  I began allowing the profanities of human emotions to marinate with the DOTs…. You know the ones… words like, jealousy, resentment, anger, insecurity, and ultimately the BIG four letter word      
            - FEAR! 

Then it happened.
It doesn't matter what the “IT” was… it was just another DOT, but the most dangerous kind for me… my feelings were hurt.  The snowball aimed right for that DOT rolling around in it until every dirty bit of it was connected to the DOT party forming in my head.  It was just the DOT to heat up the snowball enough for it to come to a full stop, a complete meltdown and a DOT EXPLOSION! 

The pity party wasn't pretty.
The meltdown was ugly.
The DOT explosion was epic causing a massive heart attack.  You see, when you over-think little DOTs they join with other DOTs in the same way blood cells stick together to block your arteries.  You don’t function well and it eventually leads to a heart attack.  

Thank goodness DOT heart attacks don’t send you to the hospital.  Yet, they have the power to do just as much damage.  Accumulating and over-thinking DOTs stifles your happiness.  Fear takes over attacking your heart and breaking down its protective covering until an explosive meltdown occurs. A crack is formed and your heart is scared in hidden ways.  

Finally, I stepped back from the dirty puddle I was sitting in and realized I had broken my own DOT rules.  By over thinking every little DOT I had given them the power to become huge in my mind.  I allowed them to connect one, by one, stripping me of my calm, my contentment and my happiness. They blinded me and I couldn't see around them.

I carried the huge DOT mass around like a collection of boulders in a backpack.  Only as I dropped the backpack did they tumble out before me and I could see the tiny pebbles each of them really were.
Just tiny DOTs in the grand adventure of life! 
                   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Any event that happens to us, around us, or concerns us is just one tiny DOT in the grand adventure of life.
        Don’t Over-Think the DOTs!"
YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to simplify your concerns and the way you handle experiences in your life - good and bad!   Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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I WANT YOU TO GO FISHING!

7/12/2019

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Before he said hello, I blurted out,
"Do you have any coffee over there?”

This was our code for – I need to talk, can I come over?

I drove the 6 blocks to his office. He was sitting at his desk, happily surrounded by pictures of his fishing adventures.

These coffee conversations began with the same ritual.
First, he would show me the photo of his most recent “biggest catch.”
The fish always looked huge in the photo.
Once he told me how he had mastered the perfect angle and focus of his camera to make it look larger than life.

I oooed and awwwed and called him the mighty fisherman.

Next came the pouring of the coffee.
It was thick, strong and served in a cup from his mismatched office collection.
No cream.
No sugar.
No asking if it was too strong.
It was the expectation that it was to be enjoyed- as is.

Finally, with the ritual complete, he would sit back with his cup, his hair framing his face, and with a familiar silence stare at me.

His eyes locking on mine without words said,
--What do you need to talk about it?

This was a scene we played out many times. The problem of the day was hashed out with laughter, at times tears, but consistently with his calm and clarifying wisdom. I walked away feeling stronger, smarter, and grateful for having him in my life.
His name was Dan.

One day during a work meeting, Dan was exceptionally quiet. Not his quipping, sharp witted, entertaining self. While chatting during the morning break, Dan mentioned that he had a headache that wouldn’t go away.

Soon the black moleskin calendar that he carried in his chest pocket, once filled with meetings, appointments, and deadlines, began to mean very little.

Painfully I watched my mentor, colleague, coffee mate, father, brother, teacher, friend slow down with the ending of life.

I would call his wife to arrange a visit and drive to his home to talk.
Our talks were shorter now with fewer words.
No fish photos, no ooing, no aweing, no…. ritual.

One sunny day we walked slowly to his front yard patio. Silently we sat with the sun on our faces, listening to the birds and looking at the sky.

His wife brought us coffee.
Like Dan, the coffee was thinner, weaker and held in a smaller container than I was used to.

Breaking the silence, he said,
“Are you happy?"

Before I could respond his weakened voice followed ,
“You need to go fishing!”

I started chattering on about how, yes, I was happy and all was going well with me. I told him I wish I could slow down and enjoy the sun more like I was doing with him right now.

He said,
"Oh, I don't know if you need to slow down like me, but I want you to relax. I want you to have fun.”

And adamantly ended with,
“I want you to go fishing!"

Again, I began talking about how I had fished as a little girl and had taken my kids fishing when they were young, but really didn’t think it was something I would do now.

His piercing eyes stopped my chatter.

I have learned life lessons in many ways; through experience, through suffering, through joy, but this time it was sitting on a patio with the sun on my face through the locking of eyes.

Silently his determined eyes told me
Wake up! This isn’t about baiting a hook or holding a fishing pole. This is about finding what you love...coming alive with joy…. Being happy… this is about Living!

The stare down continued until the communication of the moment was solidified.
He knew.
I knew.
I got it!
​I understood.

He loved fishing. Fishing was his worship, the river was the sanctuary for his soul. Fishing was where he found joy, peace, and contentment.
That is what he wanted for me.

I never forgot the lesson.
And the amazing part is…. I found it!

When I write, when I speak and look in the eyes of someone touched by my words and when I help people I am fishing.

I feel it! I feel the contentment. I feel the peace. I feel the joy. I have found what I love to do… and I am doing it!
Yes, Dan, I am fishing!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Find the river in life that brings you joy, peace and contentment. Swim in it, splash in it and fish in it!”
Picture
YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to think about what would bring you this kind of passion and joy.  What is your fishing?
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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LET THEM DANCE

7/6/2019

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Picture
​She is a four year old, blonde, blue eyed student of life.  

The evening sunset was long gone and dinner had settled in our bellies.  Just as most of us sat down to relax, she jumped in the middle of the room to demonstrate the dance moves she was learning in ballet class.  She kicked off her worn pink western boots and transformed from a chatty whirlwind of activity into a seriously composed tiny dancer.  

Her voice whispered,
     “Tap, point, tap, point,” 
as she awkwardly rotated through her toe points and pirouettes.  

After several methodical demonstrations of her talent, the group began clapping.  Her irritation was obvious when she loudly stated,
       “No!  I am still doing it!”  

The clapping hushed immediately as the understanding was clear  -- she was not done yet!

How often in life do we interrupt someone else’s dance? 
We are so rushed, busy and preoccupied that we don’t notice their dance or take the time to let the moment unfold.

When we see a fellow soul loving life, enjoying the moment and singing their heart song, we should hold the space of delight with them.  We should let it last for them (and for ourselves) as long as it can.  We should stretch it into as much absolute pleasure as possible.  

She may be a four year old learning her way, but for that space in time she was a teacher of life.  The lesson was clear; the meaning was firm. We need to recognize another’s dance, whatever form it takes and celebrate it as much as we do our own.  Allow it to last until the music of their heart stops and the dance is complete.
Don’t interrupt.  Let them dance.
                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
     “Every soul has a dance to dance.
             Celebrate everyone’s heart dance.” 
                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie Heart to Heart
 LET THE DANCE!
YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to applaud everyone's dance.  Let them dance for as long as they want.  Be in the moment of JOY with them!  
Let them dance! ​
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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USE YOUR WORDS!

6/29/2019

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Picture
 USE YOUR WORDS!

The toddler was obviously distraught as he cried and thrashed his arms. 
His mom, calmly said,
      “I don’t know what is wrong. 
        Tell me what is wrong.
        Use your words.”

This scene echoed in my mind.  It wasn’t the frustration of a two year old that impacted me.  It was the wisdom of the mom to encourage him by saying,
       “Use your words.”

How often do we need to be told to – Use Your Words?

How often do we allow anger, fear, impatience, disappointment to bring us to the point of tears and outbursts?  We don’t express what is at the core of the problem.  We don’t share our experience out loud with others allowing our vulnerability to be shared.
  Use your words!

How often do we see others in the adult version of the toddler’s meltdown and push them away without encouraging them to share their feelings?

  Use your words!
How often do we see something we agree with or enjoy on social media and find it easy just to click an automated button that expresses “like” for us without taking the time to write how much we loved it and how it touched our heart—and why?

  Use your words!
How often do we pass strangers in our day’s journey without acknowledging their space in the world… not a “Hi,” “Hello,” or “Have a wonderful day?”

  Use your words!
How often do we pass the opportunity without telling the ones closest to us that we love and appreciate them and just assume they must know?

  Use your words!
From the moment a baby is born we begin talking to them and telling them we love them. When they are able to say their first word we are filled with pride and joy. We are given voices to interact on the most human level with others.

Use your words to acknowledge others.  Don’t look at the ground as you walk.  Look at the faces of those walking with you.  Use your words to express kindness.

Use your words to express where your fear and hurt is coming from.  Don’t lash out with a violent thrashing temper when you are frustrated or angry.  

Use your words to tell people how you feel.  If you love them, say it!
Don’t assume others know how you feel. Don’t sit behind a screen tapping an automated “LIKE” button allowing a machine to express your thoughts.  Take the time to use your words!

Say them, speak them and write them down. 
Use Your WORDS!
                    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Don’t allow anger to explode or fear to silence you. Use your words to express your feelings!”
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie Heart to Heart
USE YOUR WORDS
YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to communicate your feelings.  Allowing them to fester inside will only cause an explosion at some point. 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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WASH YOUR HANDS OF IT!

6/21/2019

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How often do you wash your hands?
Most people wash their hands after gardening, before cooking, after using the restroom, and after shaking hands with someone who has a cold. 
We’ve been trained to use soap and water, and create friction by rubbing our hands together for as long as it takes to hum the happy birthday song in order to remove all of life’s nasty germs.
I would like to share with you one of my nontraditional reason to wash your hands.

How often to do come home from work completely stressed?
Have you ever returned from grocery shopping or running errands feeling exhausted?
Do you drive to work mentally overloaded with family issues and home responsibilities?

This all happens because we absorb negative energy. For me, I feel the energy of other’s so deeply that it bogs me down to the point of feeling overwhelmed and at times physically ill. 
So, I have created a ritual to address this issue.  You have heard the phrase, ‘wash your hands of it.’  Do this literally and intentionally.  Stand over the sink, use soap and water, create friction by rubbing our hands together, and visualize washing off all of the stress, exhaustion, responsibilities and negative energy you have absorbed. Choose your own theme or fight song to hum or sing if that helps. Create your own ritual.

When you come home stressed from work create a habit of washing your hands.  Add this to your routine of changing from your work clothes to your comfy home clothes.  James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, calls this habit stacking.  His idea is that by adding a new task to something you already do it is easier for it to become a habit.  What ever your after work routine is add washing your hands to it. Wash your hands of it!  Clean your hands and your mind of your work responsibilities before you engage with your family, friends and home life.

After grocery shopping or being in large groups, if you feel exhausted from picking up all the negative energy from other people --Wash your hands of it! While you are humming your personal fight song, visualize all that dirty negative energy going down the drain. 
When you arrive to work in the morning, if your mental backpack is overflowing with family issues and home responsibilities -- Wash your hands of it! Suds up those hands and intentionally allow the soap to cleanse and temporarily distance yourself from all of it, before you sit down to your desk or workstation.
There are so many times and situations you can use this technique to wash away negative energy.  You may be surprised how such a simple ritual can clear your mind and energize your body.  Remember – Wash your hands of it!
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~~ 
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
           “Wash your hands of it!
           Visualize stress, fear, anger, and
​              hurt going down the drain!” 
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to take control of the negative energy you pick up.  You can 'wash your hands of it!'
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
0 Comments

The Charlie Hunt 3 Strike Rule

6/15/2019

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My Dad had a rule of giving businesses and people three chances. 

He felt that anyone can have a day when things just don’t go right and shouldn’t be judged on one interaction or experience.  So he would allow three times to get it right. 

He wouldn’t discount a restaurant if he had a bad meal the first time he visited, or complain if a sales clerk didn’t treat him kindly, or judge a person by on misguided choice. 

He would give them a second chance. 

And a third. 

But, if on the third chance they were still inadequate or unkind he would feel confident that he gave them enough of his time to show their potential before he decided they would not be a part of his life.

My Dad passed away in 2005.  Now when I have an unpleasant experience I try to remember the Charlie Hunt 3 Strikes Rule before I immediately form an opinion. 

The second or third pitch just might be a home run!    

Pennie’s Life Lesson:
      "Don't judge on the first experience
                          or the second  
  - the third pitch just might be a home run." 
​YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to   remember that everyone can have a bad day, an off moment, a slip in judgment.  What if you gave them three changes, before you judged them?
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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REMEMBER TO REMEMBER

6/7/2019

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Picture
Why do we hold certain space markers in time so close to our hearts?

The stars on the calendar that designate special days and moments are there to encourage us to remember to remember.

My husband and I just celebrated our wedding anniversary.  As the day approached we planned a celebration dinner.  Throughout the anticipation and planning of the celebration we talked about what we were doing in this space of time years ago as we designed our wedding. 

We talked about how he proposed, the preparation and the ceremony.

But more importantly I was reminded of the feelings of that space in time.

I could FEEL the excitement again. I could sense the bouquet in my hands and the smell of the lilies. I once again was holding my son's arm as he walked me through the grass to ceremony site.  I could hear the ocean as the waves crashed to the rocks just steps from our vows.  I could feel the commitment as my husband stated, in front of our family, why he loved me. I could see the joy in the faces of the ones who joined us as we cheered with champagne, ate and danced.

I once again felt gratitude for the joining of us. 

It was more than just saying "Happy Anniversary."

The most important part of this exercise is this— We are here to have joy.

By remembering not just with your mind, but through re-feeling the joy and bringing it out of the memory space and into your emotions here and now the joy will flow through you again. The more joy you can remember, the more joy you will live in, and the more joy you will make. 

How can you use this daily?  Remember that every moment is a future memory. Fill every day with joy worthy of a star on the calendar.

The next time one of your special days marked with a star come up on your calendar Remember to Remember - not just the day, but also the feelings, the sights, the sounds and the smells.
Re-feel the experience.                                         
                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~    
Pennie's Life Lesson- "Remember to Remember not just a memory,
but to re-feel the joy the memories hold."
                   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Pennie Heart to Heart
REMEMBER TO REMEMBER

YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to remember those special days in life - not just the date, but the way it FELT!
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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WHAT DO YOU ATTRIBUTE YOUR SUCCESS TO?

6/2/2019

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Picture
Recently, I heard a question that made me ponder:

 “What do you 
attribute your place in life, your success, to?”

Of course I thought of defining moments in my life, graduations, marriage, and the birth of my children.
But this was asked in a deeper sense than that. It is one of those questions that should be given careful thought.

For me the answer came swiftly. 

I was raised in a military family.  When the word “ORDERS” was mentioned around my house it meant we would be moving. I remember waiting for my Dad to come home from work and running to see if he was carrying the yellow envelope; the one that held the name of the location of our next home. 

He would walk in, cocooned in his military green uniform and black shiny boots, whistling and smiling as if he held the secret to the universe in his hand.

Once the location was revealed my small bare feet would jump on his shiny boots. He would dance me around the kitchen while the family chattered about dates and logistics of the move. 

My Mom, a tiny powerhouse of a woman, was a working mom at a time when most moms weren’t.  With every new set of orders she orchestrated movers, house sales, school transfers, 3 unhappy children and travel. She was tough, strong and not afraid to stand up for what she believed in. 

For me, dancing with my Dad was the only fun part.  Orders meant leaving friends and starting over. I thought for sure that this was child abuse. I remember cleaning out my desk at school; walking to the school office with my Mom to fill out separation paperwork; and saying goodbye to teachers and classmates.

 I can still breathe the smell of the manila paper and packing boxes the movers used to wrap our belongs before loading them into the moving van.

I can still feel the place in my stomach where fear boiled as I walked into a new school, met new teachers and filled a new desk.
Yes, I was certain this was child abuse.

It taught me a valuable lesson--- make friends on the playground or stand alone.

I attribute the place I hold in life and any success I have to this lesson.

I may not have a best friend who has held my hand from preschool to midlife. I may not have a house to visit where I was raised with a wall chalked with my height measurements as I grew. 

But, I learned that some lessons come wrapped in pain and discomfort.
I learned how to accept change with a whistle and a smile.
I learned how to be tough, strong and not afraid to stand up for what I believe in.
I learned how to talk and communicate.
I learned how to tell my story.
I learned that relationships are important.
I learned friend building. 

Now here is the question for you to ponder: 

 “What do YOU attribute your place in life, your success, to?”
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie's Life Lesson:
    "Make friends on the playground
                   or stand alone."
               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~                     
​YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to remember those moments in life where you learned a defining lesson...one that added to your success in life. Is there someone you need to thank for that lesson? 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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IT’S ONLY OATMEAL

5/22/2019

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Picture
I remember the clock.
It looked like oak.
It wasn’t.
It was supposed to be a reminder of the time. Time to get up, time to eat, time to watch a favorite tv show, or time to go to bed.

But for my Dad, it was a count down.
A countdown of every hour, minute, and second that he continued to live. He would sit in his lazy boy starring at the clock as it ticked away what life he had remaining.

When you are dying and know you are dying big things seem small and small things seem big. He was grateful for a clean sheet on his chair and the way he felt after a shower - a small thing. But the process of standing, shuffling to the bathroom, and maneuvering his oxygen tube around him as he sat on the shower stool seemed big.

One day we were waiting for the doctor to arrive. A car ride to the doctor’s office had become more than he could handle. For the doctor to stop on his way home to check on him was a small effort, but big for my dad. The clock ticked.
My dad watched the clock.
I watched my dad.
​My mom watched me.

The doctor opened the door and brought the fresh air of the outside in with him disrupting the stuffy stagnant smell that stillness, fear, and illness creates. He also brought a smile, compassion, and hope.
After listening to my dad’s lungs and heart, checking blood pressure, and asking the routine questions, my dad said he had something he was worried about.

With weak shaking hands my dad reached to unbutton his pajama top. The doctor helped him. Pointing to his chest my dad located a crusty scabby looking circle. Between the sound of the tube sucking oxygen, my dad explained that he didn’t know what the sore was, and it had just appeared quickly. He was concerned.

The doctor reached for the nearby reading light pulling it over my dad’s chest. My mom stood on one side of my dad’s chair and I stood next to the doctor. All three of us leaned in to scrutinize the mysterious growth.
What was it?
A new complication brought on by this disease?
Something more dangerous?
We all held our breath.
 
The doctor hmmmm’d and said,
      “This is interesting.
       It looks like.... it looks like.....”
 
Then the doctor put his thumb and middle finger together and flicked the mysterious mass as if it was a bug. It flew across my dad’s chest.
     “It looks like oatmeal.”  The doctor said.
 
For the first time in many weeks, laughter erupted.
My mom clapped her hands together.  I wiped tears away as I held my stomach to stop the ache that comes from deep belly laughs.  The doctor let his laughter roar and the oxygen machine was spastically trying to keep up with the strain of my dad’s sudden need for more as he struggled to laugh.

It was just oatmeal.
A small innocent dribble of oatmeal from my dad’s breakfast that had crusted to form a mysterious mass- a big mysterious mass.

Sometimes big things seem small and small things seem big and it may just be oatmeal.
            ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“During the most intense, trying times of life big things seem small and small things seem big.”
​             ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...                  
I shared this with you  to encourage you to think about how you see events in your life.  Are they big or small?  Important or simple? 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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THREE WORDS

5/11/2019

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Picture
​Can you describe yourself in three words?
How do you see yourself?
How do you believe others see you?
 
When I was asked these questions I thought of words like Mom, Grandmother, wife, speaker, writer, but I wanted better words.
wanted words with more grandeur.
I wanted words that carried with them not just a superficial description of looks or my job(s) in life, but a feeling, a purpose and a mission.

After weeks of rolling this idea through every wrinkle of my mind and struggling to create a short list of three, I decided I wasn't the most reliable person to ask.

I wanted to know how I was doing and if others would give me a passing grade or if I needed to study harder and practice more in order to be described in the way I hoped.

So, I sent out this email:

Hello,
I am working on a project and wonder if you would take a second to help me out. It is easy - all I need you to do is send me a few adjectives that you'd think of to honestly describe me. You can send me three or twenty or as many you wish to share, but make it easy for you. No, this isn't one of the silly email "forwards" -- I really am working on a project.
Thank you so much in advance for doing this!
Pennie

This is not an exercise for the faint of spirit. As I hit the send button, bubbles over my head began filling with words I wouldn't like.
What if the responses were negative?
What if they were less than flattering?
What if no one responded; what would that mean?

But there it was, heading through the mysteries of the Internet and landing smack in the middle of 100 computer screens!

I sent it to close friends and to acquaintances.
I sent it to family members.
I sent it to people who see me daily and ones who hadn't seen me in 10 years.
I sent it to those who I was confident would say glowing things and I sent it to those who I feared might not.
From young adolescent friends of my son to legislators, they held my life image at their computer keyboards.
​
 I waited.

The first response came in minutes, others came weeks later. They came in clusters of pings to my computer and in single messages late in the night. They came in short emails with just three words.  They came in lists of adjectives depicting my impression on them with long elaborations of why they chose the words they did. 

The fear of what would be given me as the mirror of myself became a life opening experience.

I was humbled by the response as an ultimate washing of appreciation and love came through in the words given to me. Some made me laugh.
Some made me cry.
Some made me cry more.
Only three people asked me why I wanted to know.  It didn’t seem to matter.
They just responded.

I created a spread sheet to track the words. Repeated words were given a tally mark.
The spreadsheet grew with a list of 197 words.

Very quickly 13 words began creating a pattern of repetition.   The top three winners were
     Caring, Thoughtful, and Kind.
These were followed closely with     Compassionate, Honest, and Loving.

What a lesson I had learned!
These are simple words, but I realize these are my words of grandeur; my words of feeling, purpose and mission.
These are my words to live by.

Now, I have a standard to uphold.
This is how others see me and I don’t want to let them down.
                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie's Life Lesson:
When you create a standard of compassion, kindness and love to live your life by- you will receive compassion, kindness and love from others. 
              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
​YOUR TURN...                  
 I shared this with you  to encourage you to think about how you see yourself AND how others see you.  Is it the vision you want?
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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OH, FERN!

5/10/2019

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In honor of Mother's Day, I am sharing this "Pennies From The Past" about my Mom.
I wrote this in 2013 when The Fernster was 82.
And now, at almost 88, my amazement, respect and love for my Mom grows with each year. 
Happy Mother's Day to The Fernster! ​
PicturePennie and The Fernster May 2019.
I can still hear my Dad say, “Oh, Fern,”
as she began one of her stories.

He called her Fernie Annie. 
Her nickname is The Fernster. 
Elsie Fern Tutewiler Hunt – yes, that is her name. To me she is Mom and yet, she is more than any of those names.   

Growing up I remember her as the family organizer, the child wrangler, the disciplinarian, and the choreographer of our life. 

She was a working Mom when most were home watching soap operas and creating meals from the Betty Crocker Cook Book.  She worked hard and expected the same from others.  

Thinking about the Fernster, I began to wonder who she was before me, before the years of motherhood and responsibility wrapped around her.

I looked at some pictures of her in younger days.  I saw the impish smile of a child and imagined her laugh.  I saw the hair of a young woman flow around her physical presence – self-assured, happy and carefree. 

I realized that stepping back from the Mom I've always loved I could look deeper to see a whole person. Years before her title of Mom, there was a woman filled with spirit, determination and dreams, eager to experience this world.    

The Fernster is almost 82 now and slowing down a bit.  Her eyesight a little less focused, her hearing and memory a little muffled, yet her spirit and spunk remain intact.  

Now I see the whole person wrapped with memories of a life lived, people loved and experiences had.  And yet, the spark of that young woman still burns with spirit, determination and enthusiasm for life ahead.  

The Fernster.
Fernie Annie.
Elsie Fern Tutewiler Hunt.
​Yes, to me she is Mom and yet, she is more than any of those names.  I value her not only as Mom, but as a whole person she is. 
I love her so -- the person she was before me and the person she is today with me.

Oh Fern, keep telling those stories. 

                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie's Life Lesson:
         “Step back to see the ones you   
            love  as a whole person!”
                 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to help you see all the people in your life as much more than who they are now to you... look at all of their titles, their life experiences, their hopes and dreams.  See them as  the 'whole' person they are!
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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SECRETS YOUR MOM NEVER TELLS YOU --ABOUT BEING A MOM

5/4/2019

1 Comment

 
Picture
At 19 I jumped in the front seat of the craziest, scariest most exhilarating roller coaster ride of my life. BAM!  I Became AMom!

 I was mature, smart and ready to take on the world.  (Weren’t we all at 19?) Little did I know that being a mom would be the most rewarding, life changing, ride I would ever jump into.
And jump I did, not once but four times. 

Everyone watched me do it.
And no one warned me about what was ahead –  the ups, the downs, the jerks, the curves and the whiplashing shocks.
My own mother didn’t even hold up the“CAUTION PROCEED WITH CARE”sign!
She never told me the BAM of Being A Mom was a life jolt. She never told me the secrets.
 
She never told me that being a mom opens your heart to a love that you could never imagine.  The birthing and cutting of a physical umbilical cord that attaches you human-to-human in no way cuts the invisible golden cords that attach you heart-to-heart. Their body may birth to the world an independent being, but a piece of this new soul is forever kept inside and connected toyou.

She never told me that being a mom makes you vulnerable in a way you have NEVER been before.  You open yourself to being dropped to your knees by your child’s tears, broken hearts and disappointments.
Their pain is your pain.

She never told me that being a mom means you will never sleep again.  Well, never the same way you slept prior to the BAM.  You may be prepared for the first months of sleep deprivation caused by night diaper changes and bottles that will soon pass.
What you aren’t ready for is the rest of your life sleeping with one ear half open to hear their cries from a nightmare, moans from a fever and footsteps as your teenager sneaks in the house passed curfew.
What you don’t know is long after they have grown and moved out of your home you will sleep with a part of your heart open hoping they are safe, happy and loved.
You will never sleep fully again.  

She never told me that being a mom is a 24 hour, 7 day a week, forever occupation.
No vacation days,
             no sick leave and
                            no quitting! 
Once you accept the position you are locked in heart, mind and soul – FOR LIFE!
**She never even whispered that it is a job you will love with all of your heart – and some days you won’t.  On those days, you will peak at their sleeping faces and then wrap yourself in a cocoon of guilt and shame for allowing yourself to hate the job you love.

She never told me that being a mom brings you trophy words like Pride, Joy and Happiness that you can hang on your wall in an expression of motherhood.
It also brings you words like Anger, Hurt and Exhaustion that, in an attempt to hide your fear of inadequacy, you swallow and tuck in your belly hiding them so no one sees.

She never told me that being a mom makes you strong enough to endure the unthinkable.
You take on the risk of being told the baby you carry no longer has a heartbeat and you must be strong enough to walk out of the hospital carrying an empty blanket.
You take on the risk of birthing, nurturing and loving your child for years and then receiving the phone call that they are gone.  In both cases holding tightly to the golden cords that now reach to your angel child.

She never told me that being a mom makes you understand that you will be joyous when your daughter is grown and has children of her own.  You will watch through tears and laughter as she learns for herself, the unspoken secrets of being a mom.

Looking back I would tell that naïve, 19 year old girl, who thought she knew it all,
to jump.
Jump with all the love, anticipation and joy she has because through all the ups and downs being a mom is the most amazing ride she will ever be on.
​And through it all she will learn the unspoken code of never saying out loud the secret lessons of Being A Mom.
                   ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Mom’s are the gentle holders of our hearts.                     Hold theirs in return.” 
                  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~                  
​YOUR TURN...                  
My intent in sharing this with you is to encourage you to understand the ultimate love that goes in to being  a MOM!  Love yours today!!! 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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THE OTHER SIDE OF THE TABLE

4/28/2019

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Picture
Years ago I heard a story about an executive who was called into the human resources department and invited to find success elsewhere.

The executive commented,

      “I have been on your side of the table and      fired many people in my career.  What I   
     have learned is that there are two sides to
     the table…. Today it is my turn to be on
     the other side.” 

There are many tables in life.
We often forget there are two sides to each table.  During our happiest experiences do we realize that at the exact same time it could be one of those moments of desperation for someone else?
 
A young couple I know brought a baby girl into the world a year ago. They were ecstatic to add the curly headed beauty to their family.
They were on the right side of the table.

Unfortunately, their sweet baby lived less than a month and they were forced to the other side of the table in the most devastating way. 

Happily, this week my young friends rejoiced at the birth of a baby girl who shares the same curly black hair as her sister before her.
I join their friends and family surrounding them with love and well wishes.

At the same time a longtime friend of mine passed away due to cancer.
I join her friends and family clinging to the circle of support and love which surrounds them.

I received emails and phone calls from one family sharing joyous news, while at the same time I received the most devastating messages of grief and sadness from the other.

The table stood large before me as I saw the experiences of both sides.

Pain and grief on one side.
Joy and gratitude on the other.

How often do we forget that while we sit on one side of the table that there is always someone on the other side?

My young friends today hold their new daughter marveling at her perfection while the soreness of missing their first daughter lives in their hearts.
They know what it’s like to be on both sides of the table.  

The ebb and flow, the natural order, the balance of good verses bad is part of our daily lives.
It takes the ebb to feel the flow.
It takes the bad to know the good.
It takes a backdrop of the darkness of night to see the sunrise in the morning.

Be sensitive.
Be grateful.
Be aware.

We never know when it will be our turn to sit at the other side of the table.

Pennie’s Life Lesson ~
“There's always two sides to the table.  Be grateful when you sit on the sunny side and strong when you find yourself on the shadowed side.”   

                       *************
Special thanks to Ms. Amara Beatrix Mitchell for allowing me to use her beauty shot in this post! 
                        *************
YOUR TURN...         
 I shared this with you  to encourage you look at both sides of events in life- we will all be on both sides. 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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BUSY

4/21/2019

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Picture
“How are you?” –
​   “Oh, I’m so BUSY!”

“Hello there, how ya  
     doin?” –
“I am swamped, I’m too BUSY!” 

“What are you up too, want to …..
 "No, no, no, I can’t I have too much going on- I’m too BUSY!”

 “I’m busy” has become our response to any greeting.

Busy has become our natural state.
Busy has become a thing- a noun – like a dark shadow that circles our lives.
 
Do you see what we are doing to ourselves?  When did we begin equating being busy with success?
Maybe it began as an attempt to seem important by verbally listing the engagements, meetings and commitments we have on our to-do-list…and ending with a sigh.  Always a sigh.  

At some point we began believing our own self talk.  After all, our mind and brain will believe our own voice more than any other voice.  And we were very convincing.

We began to believe that we had to have a list to keep up with everyone else.  We had to be busy! 

We began to believe that the level of busy-ness was the measure of our own self-worth.  So the list became longer.  We foolishly became filled with distracting details of our activities.  The exchanged expression of ALL we have to do became expected.  And exhausting.

But, we didn’t stop there.  We began adding things to our lives.
Remember being busy = success!

Yes, life moves fast. New age electronics have increased this speed at an astounding pace.  It is frightening to ponder.   We all have work, families, responsibilities and commitments.  Do we have to make ourselves even more overwhelmed with the continual documenting of our busy-ness to everyone we interact with?
Secretly we just want to scream!

What if we began answering greetings with, 

      “I’m well, I’m happy and I am thrilled to  
       see you today!” 

What if we greeted others with,

     “What is making you happy today?” 

And then, shut up and smile.

Possibly, just possibly, the response may be more engaging than the level of overloaded activities filling the pack on their back.
They may just share a joyful story or expression of happiness.  The way greetings are meant to be.

Here is mine to you:
     “Hello there, how are you?
      What brings you joy today?”

And your response is???
               ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
“Stop telling yourself and others how busy you are.  Instead speak of the joy and happiness that fills your life!” 
​              ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
YOUR TURN...         
 I shared this with you  to encourage you think about how many times you tell others how busy you are. 
Share your thoughts and experiences relating to this post in a comment below.  And please feel free to email me  at:
                PennieHunt@gmail.com. 
                          Thank you!  
                ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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WHO IS YOUR BACKSEAT DRIVER?

4/13/2019

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Picture
Are you letting stories that you repeat over and over again define who you are?  Do you allow them to drive your life?  If you don’t know what I mean read:
WHO IS CHAUFFEURING YOUR LIFE?

Maybe you have your stories under control but have another problem… other PEOPLE who want to (or you allow to) chauffeur your life.  You know, that back seat driver that is always telling you where your life should go at every turn.  As you read that, did someone immediately come to mind?  Did you see their face and hear their voice? If so, you know what I am talking about.

Humans need human contact to survive.  People need people.  We need time. We need touch.  We need connection.

What we don’t need is to feel like we are powerless or controlled.  We don’t need to feel like our emotions and happiness are totally dependent on pleasing someone else.  We don’t need to feel like our actions are being controlled by the demands of another person.

I do have a caveat here -- I am not talking about a mutually loving relationship where there is reciprocity of respect, kindness and love.  It is healthy when we give of our self and do acts of love and kindness for others and in return receive feelings of love and self-satisfaction.

I am talking about the sponges that soak up all of our good intentions and acts of kindness without returning any level of thoughtfulness.  Oh, occasionally they may throw a sweet gesture your way, but for the most part, they hold an expectation that you will always be there, always support them and always give, give, give.

We believe the control is created by the other person, but the reality is – WE create the situation by giving away our control.  We allow the back seat driver to steer our life and control our actions.  Let me say that again- WE create the situation by giving away our control.

By doing this we give away our happiness. We cheapen our value by letting others push our buttons. We feel tied like a puppet with no way to cut the strings.  And yet, we are the only ones who can.

It is even possible that the other person is not aware of this situation, but it has been going on for so long that it has become a habit that holds no consequences or responsibility on their side.  After all, they are in the cushy seat, the comfortable place, the receiving end.

We must create boundaries. 
Boundaries around what we will or won’t do. 
Boundaries around our self-inflicted guilt when we believe we are responsible for the other person. 
Boundaries around our hearts as a protection from the invisible force of expectation we feel from the other person. 
And boundaries around our minds that have been trained to create the illusion of obligation to this person.

Isn’t it time to put the brakes on?
If you are always giving family members or friends money to get them back on their feet, but never see them grow up and take control of their own life --Stop writing checks expecting this to change.

If someone is always late, wait an appropriate 10-15 minutes and then leave- they obviously feel their time is more important than yours. Don’t cheapen your value.

If you are the one who tries to make everything perfect for others in hopes of making them happy, but it is never enough-- it probably never will be enough and they will probably never be happy… and while doing this, neither will you.

If you are under obligation to continually take care of or give to a person, evaluate if the obligation is real or is it just your perception that you “owe” someone your time and talent.  Evaluate the situation for codependency.  Are you getting something from being a martyr?  Even if you feel like you are being used and taken advantage of, have you become dependent on being needed?

If you are continually trying to stop giving your resources of time, finances, energy and control of your emotions and life to someone else, but only break free for short periods of time. Then you slip back into the old pattern again of one-way giving.  Chart how long you have been doing this pattern. Where has it gotten you?

If you are following a life path because someone told you it was the road you should take, but you hate the scenery, you feel lost, or you know in your heart it isn’t the way you should be going, it is never too late to stop, make a U-turn and let your soul’s GPS recalculate to guide you on YOUR path.  There isn’t time to be controlled by a backseat driver. Be your own navigator on this road of life.
Take control of your own steering wheel.
                  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Pennie’s Life Lesson:
    “Take control of your own thoughts,
                      time and talent. 
         Don’t allow a back seat driver to
​                     steer your life.”
                    ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
Pennie Heart to Heart
WHO IS YOUR BACKSEAT DRIVER?
           All Rights Reserved
                 Copyright © 2013-2019 Pennie Hunt
         This was written and produced by Pennie Hunt.
Feel free to forward and share this post.  Please keep the entire message intact, including  contact, logo, and copyright information.​
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    Author

    There is a certain magic about where I live both physically and spiritually – on the crossroads of Spirit and Brave. 

    It seems appropriate that my writings be found under the sign that locates my life.  I wish for all of you the ability to live in your Spirit to experience a life filled with love and gratitude and be Brave in the learning of your life lessons. 

    Enjoy!
            Pennie

     

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